Life As We Know It
by Oliviet
Summary: When tragedy strikes taking the lives of Hodgins and Angela, Booth and Brennan are forced to raise their child as their own. But before they can be deemed fit parents they have to figure out how to get along with each other again. Roughly based on the movie.
1. My Ghost

**AN: I do not own "Life As We Know It" or the dialogue from "Daredevil in the Mold" or the songs from each chapter or the books quoted or even Bones; sad, but true. This was written before 6x22/6x23 aired. Didn't know that Michael was going to be a boy yet. Enjoy!**

_Lovers come and lovers go. Once they lived but now they're ghosts. _

_Walking the streets we used to know like shadows._

"Brennan, I'd like you to meet your goddaughter, Katherine Temperance."

"She's beautiful, Ange," Brennan commented taking the newborn into her arms. Hodgins cleared his throat. "And Hodgins too, of course."

The infant in her arms undoubtedly had Angela's facial structure, but the thin layer of brown hair atop her head already had a slight curl to it, suggesting that she had inherited Hodgins' mess of curls. Holding her drew a sharp pang to Brennan's chest, reminding her of how much she had come to want a baby of her own. Rearing a child would certainly be an adventure; one she was beginning to think that she would never get to take.

"Is he really going to stand out there, the whole time that you're in here?" Angela asked, eyeing Booth from the doorway.

"Yes, he refuses to be in the same room with me," Brennan sighed.

"That's ridiculous. You're Booth and Brennan. You two can't hate each other."

"I don't see what significance our names have to do with our likeability towards each other."

"What she means," Hodgins started, "is that you and Booth have always been really close and for something like this to happen is…really out of character."

She responded with a sigh, merely looking down to admire her goddaughter.

"You realize we made him the godfather, right? You two are going to have to relearn how to be in the same room at some point," Angela pointed out. "Can't you guys just hug and make up?"

"It's not that simple, Ange," Brennan replied thinking back to the awful fight she and Booth had had months ago.

"Sweetie, it's been three months since you two had this fight and you still won't tell me what happened. What the hell did you guys say to each other?"

Brennan handed Katherine over to Hodgins, before slumping down next to Angela on the hospital bed. Then she thought back again to her fight with Booth and began to tell her friends everything that had happened.

_He was sitting at the bar surrounded by empty shot glasses and larger ones that she assumed had contained whiskey at some point. She walked over to him and said the first thing that came into her mind, "Are you drunk?"_

_Booth shook his head, barely looking at her. "Relatively. Relatively I'm drunk, meaning I'm drunker than usual, but no I am not a drunk."_

"_You sound…something." She wasn't exactly sure what she had meant by that. But then again she wasn't exactly sure how he sounded. Booth looked down at his drink, but said nothing so she just dove right into the subject. "Hannah called me."_

_He let out a frustrated sigh. "No, just…I really…I don't want to talk about that, okay? I'm just I'm over it, I'm over it. I'm done."_

"_So, what happens next?"_

"_What happens next? We…you like evidence, right Bones? Well here's the evidence. The evidence is that there is something wrong here. Now I…I fell in love with a woman and had a kid. She doesn't want to marry me. Well and, and then the next woman well she's…"_

"_Me," Brennan finished softly, knowing all too well where this was headed._

_He still wouldn't look at her. "Yeah and now… I mean what is it with women…they just don't want what I'm offering here."_

"_Booth –"_

"_No, just…you know what? Drink. Drink. I'm just going to –" he stopped midsentence, taking a shot. Brennan took one as well, hoping it would calm her nerves. "I'm just mad. I'm just really mad at all of you. I'm just mad. Okay so, you wanna know how this is going to work? Okay so, this is how this is going to work. Me and you are partners. That's what we do. We're partners, all right? And I love that. I think that's great. And uh, we're good people, who catch bad people, all right? And, and, and we argue, we go back and forth, we're partners. And sometimes, after we solve a case, we come here and we celebrate." _

_He raised his glass to emphasize his point. "That's what we do; we celebrate. So as far as I can see, that is what happens next. Are you okay with that?" He finally turned to look at her, holding her gaze. "Great because you know if you are, I'll tell you what, you stay here and you have a drink with me. All right, ah maybe we have a little small talk, chit-chat, and if you're not well…you can leave. There's the door. And ah, tomorrow I'll find you a new FBI guy." He took another drink. _

"_Those are my only choices?"_

"_Yeah. Those are your only choices."_

_She stared at him for a long moment, waiting to see if he'd go off on another tangent. When he didn't, she sighed. She really wished he had more to add. _

"_You're kidding, right?" Brennan finally asked._

"_What?" he cocked his head at her. _

"_I'm sitting right here. You know how I feel about you. I know how you feel about me…or at least how you used to."_

"_Bones –"_

"_You're clearly miserable. And I… well I haven't been all that happy lately either and –"_

"_No, we are not doing this right now," Booth said, shaking his head. _

"_Well, I don't like either of the options you just presented me with."_

"_You either want to be my partner or you don't. There's no in between."_

"_I want to be more than your partner."_

_Saying it out loud, telling him…it was freeing. Ever since her breakdown in his car a month ago, Brennan had refrained from bringing it up. She couldn't stand the pitiful look Booth had given her that night. The look that had said "you're too late, sorry; it's never going to happen now." But Hannah was out of the picture now, and Brennan wasn't about to let him think that she was just another woman who had broken his heart. She wouldn't let him give her that look ever again. _

"_I can't," Booth said, softly._

"_Can't or won't?"_

"_Bones, you and I…our time has come and gone."_

"_How can you say that? You woke up from a coma and thought that I was your wife. You know that I hate psychology, but feelings like that… they just don't go away."_

"_It's been over a year since that happened. A lot can happen in a year."_

"_Then maybe you should find me a new FBI agent," Brennan said staring into the empty shot glass between her hands. _

"_Seriously? It's either all or nothing with you?"_

"_I need to move on. I can't do that if I have to work with you every day."_

_Booth turned to look at her. She felt his eyes on her, but refused to remove her gaze from the shot glass. _

"_You can't leave me too," he told her._

"_Hannah didn't leave you. You broke up with her. You're to blame for her leaving, just like you are for me leaving now."_

_Brennan got up from her chair and started to leave, when Booth grabbed her wrist._

"_I can't start anything with you right now because I don't want you to be my rebound."_

"_Hannah was your rebound."_

"_From what, Bones? It's not like we had an actual relationship."_

"_She was your attempt at moving on…from me."_

"_Attempt? I'd say that I moved on."_

"_Yeah? And how did that work out for you?"_

_Booth instantly retracted like she had slapped him and Brennan immediately clamped her hand over her mouth._

"_I'm sorry. I didn't mean it like –" she said in a rush._

"_Yes, you did. Why is it so hard for you to accept that I was happy with her; that I actually loved her? I never took you to be the jealous type, Bones."_

"_I –"_

"_And you know what? You told me to move on; said that you weren't right for me."_

"_I also told you that I regretted doing that."_

"_That doesn't matter, because at the time –"_

"_So what do you want me to say, Booth?"_

"_I don't want you to say anything. Either sit here and have a drink with me, accepting the fact that we are partners and nothing more, or leave and expect a new partner on Monday. Those are your only options." _

_Brennan inhaled a shaky breath as she felt tears pooling in her eyes. "Fine. It's been a great six years, Agent Booth. I'm sorry it had to end on such…awful terms."_

_She heard him calling her name as she left The Founding Fathers, but she chose to ignore it, hoping that if she could get away without looking back, the pain wouldn't be quite as overwhelming. _

"Oh sweetie," Angela whispered, pulling Brennan into a hug. "Why would he do that to you? I mean, I thought that our new FBI guy, what's his name again, George?"

"Greg," Brennan corrected.

"Right, Greg. I thought that he was just temporary until you and Booth stopped fighting. I didn't realize that he was the result of your break up."

"We were never together, Ange. We didn't 'break up.' We just…stopped being friends."

"Do you want us to make someone else the godfather?" Hodgins asked.

"No, you guys don't have to do that. Booth was right; our time has come and gone. We missed it. It's not like it would have worked out anyway, I mean have you met us? We couldn't be more different."

"And that's what made you two so great!" Angela exclaimed.

"Angie," Hodgins warned.

"Really you guys, it's fine. I'm going to leave now so Booth can come meet Katherine."

"You shouldn't have to do that," Angela told her.

"Please, you guys, don't be too hard on him. What happened was equally my fault if not more so. I'm the one who left him. I've become just another person that he cared about who has walked out of his life."

She stood surveying the new family for a moment before bidding her goodbyes and heading out of the room. Booth was sitting on a bench just outside of the doorway.

"You can go in now," Brennan told him softly.

"Thanks," Booth muttered, making no effort to move off the bench.

"Right. See you around."

"Yeah."

She couldn't believe that this was what their conversations had turned into; what their _relationship_ had turned into. If only she hadn't been so scared of commitment that night, none of this would have happened. No one would know who Hannah Burley is and she and Booth would still be partners, if not more. That single moment that night outside of Sweet's office had become her biggest regret. Funny thing is, she knew it would be the moment she pulled away from his kiss.

(Insert line break here.)

It had been over a month since they'd last seen or spoken to each other. And the last time had been the exchanging of minimal words as they took turns visiting their new goddaughter at the hospital. Today they were both set to attend Michelle's graduation party, and Brennan dreaded the moment when they would inevitably be forced to make small talk.

She was standing by the food table, holding Katie for Angela while she cut herself a piece of cake, when she saw him walk in. Instinctively, their eyes found each others from across the room.

"Shit," she mumbled.

"Hey, watch your language around my kid," Angela scolded.

"Booth is coming this way."

"Shit."

"How's my favorite girl doing today?" Booth asked as he approached them.

Brennan shot him a look of confusion which he immediately caught on to. "I was talking to Katie," he clarified with a small laugh.

Brennan blushed as Angela took Katie back into her arms.

"Are you having a good day, Miss Katie?" Angela cooed. The infant just stared back at her mother with her big brown eyes. "I'll take that as a yes."

"Good food?" Booth asked, gesturing to the assortment spread out on the table.

Angela nodded. "Haven't tried the cake yet, but it looks delicious. Now, if you'll excuse me, this little one needs her diaper changed."

Brennan shot her a look, begging her not to leave her alone with Booth.

"Sorry," Angela mouthed in response, leaving the two ex-partners alone in the room.

"So…how've you been?" Booth asked sheepishly.

"Fine. And you?"

"Fine."

They stood there awkwardly avoiding each others gaze like they had never been as close as they were just mere months ago.

Finally, Booth spoke up. "Do uh, do you want to talk about what happened at the Founding Fathers?"

"What is there to talk about? You don't want anything more and I do, so I'm trying to move on. Case closed."

"Bones, that's…that's not fair."

"What I'm saying isn't fair?" Brennan practically laughed. "So it's fair that when you wanted to move on, you could go off and find Hannah, but now that _I_ want to move on, I'm not allowed to?"

"That's not what I meant, and you know it," Booth said crossing his arms over his chest.

"Maybe not, but you're basically saying that you're allowed to fight for us, and I can't."

"Right, right, and you fought really hard, Bones. You gave up after what, like 15 minutes?"

"I gave up because you refused to change your outlook on the situation! And it's not like you fought very hard for me either."

"You're wrong! That night outside of Sweet's office –"

"Yes, but after that –"

"I thought that's what you wanted. For me to just drop it."

"I never said that."

"Yes, you did! You told me to move on and find someone who wouldn't hurt me like you would."

Her gaze dropped to the floor. "I was scared."

"Really? You're going to use that excuse on me now? You were scared. Don't you think I was scared too? You know what Brennan, I was terrified! We'd been partners and friends for _five years _and I really didn't want to screw that up. But like Sweets and I said, I'm the gambler; I take risks. So I took a risk, and look where it's gotten us."

"Your invitation to start a relationship didn't get us here, your denial of one did."

He let out a frustrated sigh. "I think it's about time that you grow up and just accept it don't you think?"

"Accept what, Booth?"

"Your abandonment. Just because no one wanted you as a kid, doesn't mean you can take out your pain on everyone else. You have serious trust issues, Brennan, and I think that it's high time you come to terms with them."

"What the hell? Where did _that_ come from?" Brennan asked, trying to hide the hurt in her voice.

"You clearly don't trust me anymore. You don't trust your family after what they did to you, and now somehow, I ended up in that same category. And I just think that it's time that you move on from it all."

Brennan's hands curled into fists. "You have no idea what you're talking about. You don't have the right to say anything like that!"

"Like hell I don't!"

"You know what you can just go to hell!" she yelled as she slapped him across the face.

"Too late. I'm already there!"

Booth's hand came up to rub his jaw as he watched her storm out of the room in a huff. Had he gone too far? Probably. Had he ruined whatever was left of their relationship? Definitely. Did he care? Not at this point. Booth was just tired of her, of their fighting, of everything. He knew he was going to regret this decision later, but right now he was simply satisfied.

**AN: So leave a review maybe? **


	2. The Story of Us

_Now I'm standing alone in a crowded room and we're not speaking._

_And I'm dying to know if it's killing you like it's killing me yeah._

_I don't know what to say, since the twist of fate when it all broke down._

_The story of us is a lot like a tragedy now. Next chapter._

_One year later._

"Come on Katie sweetie, let mommy put you in your pretty new dress. People will be here soon," Angela pleaded with her daughter.

"Only one and she's already a tomboy," Hodgins laughed entering the nursery to join his family.

"She is going to wear this dress to this party whether she wants to or not."

"Ah come on, Ange, it's her birthday. Let the girl wear what she wants."

"Jack, she's one. If I let her choose, she'll opt for no clothes at all. Our daughter is not starting her life out as a stripper."

Hodgins laughed again, ruffling his daughter's mop of curls. "You're not going to be a stripper are you, Katie? You're going to be a scientist like your dad."

"Or an artist," Angela put in, surveying the child's closet for another dress.

"All right compromise," Hodgins suggested. "You can be whatever you want to be as long as you keep your clothes on."

This time, it was Angela's turn to laugh. "Deal." She walked over to Katie with a blue sundress to replace the ruffled pink one. Katie let her dress her in this one.

"Guess she doesn't want to be a princess," Hodgins shrugged. "Which may or may not be a good thing."

"I blame Brennan," Angela said with a smile. "She keeps criticizing the Disney Princesses every time she watches a movie with us. Guess I can't blame her with everything the girl's been through, but still her parents were around for her childhood. That should mean something, shouldn't it?"

"With Brennan, I never know. Speaking of, isn't today going to be the first time she and Booth are in the same room together since well…you know?"

"Yes," she responded, as she began brushing Katie's short hair. "But they've both assured me that they can handle it. And they better because I threatened both of them to behave for this party or else."

"Again, I emphasize the point that she is one. She's not going to remember her first birthday party."

"Maybe not, but I will. And I will not spend my day mediating between them."

Hodgins sighed. "Want me to assign that job to Cam and Sweets?"

"You shouldn't have to, but if push comes to shove, then yes."

Hodgins nodded, taking Katie into his arms.

"You know I love our life right now, but some days I feel like I would give anything to just go back to the days when they were happy together. I hate seeing them fight and I hate seeing Brennan so sad all of the time."

"Oh I know," Hodgins agreed, using his free hand to rub his wife's back. "Those were good days. But you know? So are these. And in my opinion, with the history that those two have, they can't hate each other forever."

"I really hope so because this George guy is really starting to get on my nerves."

"Greg, honey his name is Greg."

"Oh whatever."

"You'd think that after a year, you'd know his name."

"I also thought that after a year Brennan and Booth would be a couple. See how wrong I can be?"

Hodgins was about to respond when the doorbell rang. "Oh look party's starting!"

"Uh-huh, way to avoid the question." Angela turned off the light in the nursery, praying that today would go off without a hitch, especially one involving Booth and Brennan.

(Insert line break here.)

He was early; he knew that. But he'd overestimated the amount of time it would take him to buy his goddaughter a birthday present. He'd rationalized that since he was the godfather it was okay for him to show up early. Thinking that made him feel like Brennan and he immediately worried that she too would be there early, leaving the two of them awkwardly alone while Angela and Hodgins finished setting up.

When he pulled into the driveway, he was relieved that her car was nowhere in sight. And then he saw a car he didn't recognize and began to fear that in their year apart she had purchased a new car. She certainly had the money for it.

As soon as Hodgins opened the door, Booth blurted, "Please tell me you got a new car."

"Uh yeah, we did. Angie's been complaining about my classic car's ability to function with a car seat."

"Oh thank God," Booth sighed with relief, pushing past him into the house.

"May I ask what that was about?" Hodgins asked, following him into the kitchen.

"I thought maybe Brennan had gotten a new car."

"You realize she _is_ coming today right?" Hodgins asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Yeah, but so are a ton of other people. As long as we're not the first two people here, I can avoid her."

"You're not even going to talk to her?"

"Nope." Booth took down a glass from the cabinet and filled it with the lemonade Angela had set aside for the party.

"Booth, she's your best friend."

_Best friend_? What was he? Nine? She was just his partner…whom he told everything to…who told everything to him…who he had been in love with…who broke his heart…No! He couldn't go back to that place. Brennan had pushed him away to protect him from her and for the first time he could see why.

"Was. Past tense."

"Booth! That's for the party!" Angela exclaimed walking into the kitchen holding Katie and gesturing toward the lemonade in his hand.

"Well, I'm here for the party," Booth replied taking a sip. "And I'm here to see my favorite girl; it's her birthday after all."

Katie giggled at that.

"And you promise that you won't be fighting with Brennan?" Angela pressed.

"Don't even plan on talking to her," he shrugged.

"Seriously? Not even a hello?"

"Do you want us to fight or not?"

"No! I just…I want everything to go back to normal. Is that too much to ask for?"

"Actually it is –"

"All right, all right. Enough," Hodgins interrupted. "Today is about Katie, can we please keep it that way? I know I'm guilty of bringing your guys' relationship into this as well, but if we can stop talking about it now _before_ Brennan gets here, that would be ideal."

"Don't have to tell me twice," Booth said reaching to take Katie from Angela. "Let's go look at all of the pretty decorations outside shall we?"

Hodgins turned to Angela and whispered, "I still think we should have had separate parties for them."

"Will you relax? Everything's going to be fine."

"You realize that now that you've said that, everything is going to go to hell, right?"

"Jack…" Angela warned.

"I'm just saying," Hodgins replied holding his hands up in defense.

"Well if everything goes to hell, I'll just blame you," she smirked, heading out back to join Booth and Katie.

"I knew I was digging a hole with that one."

(Insert line break here.)

He was the first thing Brennan saw when she stepped into Angela and Hodgins' backyard. He was talking to Cam and Sweets next to a table lined with pink-frosted-cupcakes and glitter confetti. He looked…_happy_ and she had to admit that made her angry. Why does he get to be happy after everything that's happened when the only thing Brennan felt these days was lonely?

"Brennan!"

She turned to find Angela standing behind her with her hands on her hips.

"You look upset. Why are you upset?" Brennan asked.

"I saw you looking at him."

"What am I not allowed to look at him now?"

"No, that's not it. I just think that if looking at him makes you so sad, you should avoid it," Angela replied, moving to embrace her friend.

"I'm not sad, Angela. We've been through this."

"Yeah, yeah, tell me that all you want, but I won't believe you. I _know_ you Temperance Brennan. Therefore I _know_ that he makes you sad."

Brennan sighed turning her gaze back to Booth and the others. "It's been a year. I should be over this by now; over him."

"And like I said a year ago, you guys are 'Booth and Brennan.' It can't ever be over between you two."

"But it is. Before anything ever really started. But never mind that, where's Katie?"

"With my father. Which is…around here somewhere."

"I had no idea Katie had so many friends," Brennan mused, observing the throng of people mulling about the yard.

"Yeah a lot of them are from daycare," Angela laughed. "But to be completely honest, I would have preferred it just to have been the team."

"Please don't tell me that you invited all of these other people just so Booth and I could avoid each other."

"Don't be silly, we invited these people for Katie. They're her friends!"

"Uh-huh," Brennan said skeptically. "I may not know a whole lot about child development, but I do know that at the age of one –"

"All right fine," Angela cut her off. "We invited all of these people so you two could avoid each other. Are you happy now?"

"Not necessarily…"

"Oh Bren," Angela sighed. "Come on, let's go find your goddaughter."

(Insert line break here)

He was talking with Cam and Sweets when he saw her enter the party. She was growing her hair back out and her bangs had long since disappeared. She looked like the girl he had fallen in with again. Booth watched her as she looked in his direction and only held her gaze for a second before laughing at whatever joke Sweets had been telling.

"Oh did you like that Agent Booth?" Sweets asked. "I've got another one…"

"No, it's okay Sweets one is good enough for me."

"You see her, don't you?" Cam asked raising an eyebrow.

"See who?" Booth asked trying to sound oblivious.

"Doctor Brennan," Sweets replied. "She just got here and now she's talking to Angela."

"Well good, let her talk to Angela."

"You know, it might actually be beneficial to both of you if you were to go talk to her," Sweets suggested.

"Can't do that. Angela made me promise we wouldn't fight. If I go over to talk to her, we'll end up in a fight."

"You don't know that," Cam stated. "I'm sure you two are plenty capable of having a civil conversation."

"You'd think that, wouldn't you?" Booth mumbled.

He thought back to the last "civil" conversation he'd had with her. It had been at Michelle's graduation party. What had started out as small talk had turned into a full out yelling match.

_You don't have the right to say anything like that!_

_Like hell I don't! _

_You know what you can just go to hell!_

_Too late. I'm already there!_

Booth shuddered at just the thought of it. He'd never seen her get that pissed before; never heard her talk like that before. And to think that _he_ was the one who had caused it? At the time it had been intentional; he was trying to get a rise out of her so she would stop blaming him for everything and just go away. But now…no, he would not be talking to Brennan today. The last thing he needed was for her to slap him again.

"Agent Booth, do you know what I think?" Sweets started.

"Yeah, I do. And I don't care," Booth cut him off.

"Seeley, he's just trying to help," Cam put in.

"Yeah, I get that, Camille. But I'm sick and tired of everyone trying to help us. Get over it; it's over. Isn't there anyone at this party who knows how to mind their own God-damned business?" He walked away from them with that, intent on finding Katie. That child certainly wouldn't care about his past relationships.

Of course as luck would have it, when he did finally locate his goddaughter, she was in Brennan's arms.

"Did you want her?" Brennan asked before he could get away.

"Now isn't really the best time to discuss that," Booth said trying to leave.

Confusion etched across her face, "I was talking about Katie."

"Oh!" Booth blushed, embarrassed. "Well yeah I came looking for her, but she's in good hands so I can just –"

"You can take her. I've had her for a while anyway."

"You sure?"

Brennan nodded handing Katie over to him. "What did you think I meant by 'do you want her?'?"

"It's not important."

"Did you honestly think I was making a reference to Hannah? After all this time?"

"Seriously, can we not do this right here?"

"Do what, Booth? It's not like there is anything left of our friendship to wreck."

"We promised Angela we wouldn't fight, okay? So just…forget it."

Booth started to walk away when a comment from Brennan stopped him. "What happened to us, Booth? We used to be so happy."

"I guess some people are just meant to fall in love with each other but are not meant to be together." And before she had a chance to respond, Booth and Katie left the room leaving Brennan all alone.

(Insert line break here.)

"Oh man, what a day," Angela sighed, slumping down in her seat in the car.

"No kidding. It was nice of Michelle to volunteer to watch Katie while we checked back in at the lab," Hodgins commented from his place in the driver's seat.

"Hey, she's a poor college kid now. She needs the cash."

"Ah man, I remember being a poor college kid…"

"Jack, you're from a family of billionaires."

"Well yeah, but they wouldn't let me touch the money until I had earned a degree. I mean they paid my tuition and everything, but for food and stuff, I was on my own."

"Oh you poor thing," Angela laughed.

"Hey, your dad is a rock star. You're loaded too."

She laughed again and turned to look out the window. "Look at the sky over there. Looks like it's about to storm."

"Oh great," Hodgins mumbled as rain began pelting the front of the car. "We'll never get Katie to sleep if there's thunder keeping her up all night. You know she hates storms."

"I'm sure she'll tire eventually. She is one now; old enough to sleep through the night. Babe, you should probably turn on your headlights, it is really coming down out there."

"Right, headlights. And those would be where?"

"You seriously haven't figured that out yet?" Angela asked with a smirk.

"Well…no," Hodgins confessed, playing with various buttons on the dashboard.

"It's on the other side," she told him, trying to point to the button's location.

"Over here?"

"Yes," she said turning her eyes back to the road. "Oh my God, Jack, watch out!"

**AN: I'm the kind of person who checks their e-mail every hour looking for reviews. Just in case you were wondering…**


	3. Bell, Book, and Candle

_White horses on a troubled sea. Your smile will flash through time._

_Up ahead a blackbird's wing, your hair will come to mind._

_Every night I see your face when I have to pray._

_I need a bell, book, and candle to keep your ghost away. _

* * *

They say you always remember where you were the moment a tragedy happens. Brennan had been in third period Chemistry when Russ had called to tell her that their parents hadn't come back yet and about how he doubted that they ever would. She had been standing in the driveway of their old house as she watched her older brother apologize over and over and rant about not being able to take care of a teenager as he got in his car and left her completely alone. On 9/11 she was fresh out of grad school, sitting in her new apartment watching the news story play out on the TV, when her boss had called her informing her that she was to go to New York and help with the identification effort. And today she was driving to the Jeffersonian thinking about how she needed to go to the store to buy bread when she received the phone call that would change her life forever.

When her cell phone started ringing, she assumed it was Greg complaining about how she wasn't at the lab yet. "Listen Greg, traffic is terrible this morning. I'll get there, when I get there."

"Dr. Brennan?" came the timid response from the other end.

"Oh, I'm sorry. I thought…yes, this is she."

"This is Dr. Ramirez calling from Memorial Hospital. Are you able to come over here right now?"

"I'm actually running late for work. What is this in regard to?"

"Angela Montenegro and Jack Hodgins."

Brennan's heart stopped and she nearly slammed on her brakes. "I uh…I'll be right there."

* * *

Booth's heart was pounding so fast by the time he got to the hospital that he thought he could hear his own blood rushing through his veins. The doctor on the phone hadn't told him much, just that something had happened to Angela and Hodgins and that he needed to get to the hospital ASAP. He tried to tell himself to calm down. Maybe it was nothing serious; Katie just needed a sitter for a while or something. But oh God, what if something had happened to Katie?

He pushed through the emergency room doors at the same time as a brunette woman. He looked over at her, noticing that it was Brennan. Okay, if they were both here, something had to be really wrong…

"Brennan," Booth called, getting her attention.

Her eyes immediately found his. "Do you know what happened?"

Booth shook his head.

"Excuse me," a man in a white lab coat approached them. "Agent Booth? Dr. Brennan?"

"Yes," the two said in unison. They threw each other a look of confusion, as though it was the first time they had ever been in sync.

"I'm Dr. Ramirez; I spoke with you on the phone."

"What happened? Are they okay? How's Katie?" Brennan asked in a rush.

"You two may want to sit down."

They looked at each other again before sitting next to each other on the waiting room chairs.

"Your friends were in a car accident. It was raining and they were driving down a two-lane road. Witnesses said that their car started to swerve into the other lane, hydroplaning, right in front of a semi. They were killed on impact."

"Oh my God," Booth breathed, putting a hand over his mouth and looking over at Brennan. Her face was completely white and she looked like she was going to be sick.

"And Katie?" Brennan whispered.

"Their daughter was with a sitter. She's been placed with a temporary foster family for the night."

"No," Brennan said forcibly. "No foster families. I can take her."

"I'm sorry, Dr. Brennan, but it's protocol. You can pick her up in the morning."

"Screw protocol!"

"Brennan," Booth said softly, placing a hand on her shoulder. She turned around to glare at him, or so he thought. Instead she collapsed against him, wrapping her arms around his torso, and burying her face into his chest. His first instinct was to push her away, but he knew now wasn't the time to be angry with her. So he wrapped his arms around her as well, pulling her closer. Booth rested his chin on top of her head, his tears falling into her hair as hers drenched his shirt.

"I'm sorry for your loss," Dr. Ramirez said quietly, excusing himself from the situation.

It was like time had stopped. All Booth could think about was how yesterday he had yelled at Angela and Hodgins to mind their own business when it came to him and the woman currently in his arms. About how many times yesterday he'd repeated that he wasn't going to talk to Brennan because he'd promised Angela that they wouldn't fight during the party. And now, suddenly, after everything, they were gone.

"One night in foster care, she'll be fine," Booth finally said.

He felt her nod against his chest, but she made no move to move away from him.

"Want me to call Greg for you and tell him you're not coming in?"

"No…I…I'll go in."

"You can't be serious."

"We're still in the middle of a case. This doesn't…fuck. Hodgins wasn't done with –" Brennan drew in a shaky breath unable to finish. She closed her eyes and stepped back out of Booth's embrace.

"Hey, forget about the case."

"Angela hadn't even finished the facial reconstruction. Without them, I don't know who this person is. Without them…" she buried her face in her hands as a fresh wave of tears overcame her.

Booth began rubbing small circles onto her back. "Don't worry about that okay? You're an amazing anthropologist, Bren. You'll solve the case after we all adjust to this…change."

"I need…I need an artist, and a botanist, and an entomologist…I need _them_."

"Hey you know what? I'll call Greg all right? And then you and I can go tell Cam and Sweets and…everybody else. How does that sound?"

"Like my best friend and her husband just died."

* * *

Brennan pulled up to social services the next morning after a night of zero sleep. She felt completely drained and was in no mood to try and convince a social worker that her living conditions were ideal for Katie. She cringed immediately after stepping into the building. It looked just like all of the others; the D.C. office was no different than those she had been in and out of as a teen.

She spotted a young boy sitting outside of one of the offices clutching a backpack to his chest. The image hit a little too close to home for her. A backpack and a small suitcase had once contained everything that she owned. Brennan glanced at the boy again. He kind of looked like Sweets. Hopefully he'd be lucky like Sweets and get adopted. She hadn't been that lucky; no one had wanted her.

Brennan shook off the awful feelings from her past and located the correct office. She walked into Katie's case worker's office and found Booth already sitting there.

"What are you doing here?" Brennan asked, bitterly.

"She's my goddaughter too you know."

She sighed and sat down in the chair next to him.

Booth looked over at her. He sensed her uneasiness. "Is it hard for you to be here?"

"I'm fine," she replied, keeping her gaze focused on the empty desk in front of them.

"It's okay, you can talk to me you know. I know what you've been through."

"You've lost your right to know things like that."

"Brennan –"

"Sorry I'm late!" exclaimed a petite redhead entering the office. "I'm Mindy Johnson, Katie's case worker."

She hauled a stack of paperwork onto her desk and began ruffling through the files. Brennan let out a long sigh, remembering her constant frustration with her social workers' ability to organize.

"Ah here it is. So, our lawyers took a look at Jack and Angela's will. They left their entire estate to their daughter, and their daughter to the two of you," Mindy explained.

"Wait a second," Booth started. "The two of us? As in together?"

"That's correct," Mindy replied.

"So what does that mean?" Brennan asked. "In terms of where Katie is going to live."

"Well, I would suggest that the two of you move into the Hodgins' estate since it technically belongs to Katie –"

"We're not married," Booth corrected quickly. "We're not even a couple."

"The last time I checked, we didn't even like each other," Brennan mumbled.

"Wait, you two aren't together?" Mindy asked, confused. She began ruffling through the pile of paperwork in front of her.

"That's not a problem, is it?" Brennan wanted to know. "Can I still take Katie home?"

"Well, Agent Booth does have rights to her now as well –"

"You don't want her, do you?" Brennan asked, looking at him.

"Hey, I care about that little girl just as much as you do. Of course I want to help take care of her," Booth protested.

"And you can, but she will be living with me."

"Since when do you know anything about raising a kid? I'm the parent here!"

"That little girl is the only thing I have left of my best friend; you are not taking her away from me."

"No one said I'm taking her anywhere. I just –"

"Perhaps you two could _temporarily _move into the Hodgins' estate," Mindy interrupted. "Just so Katie can get used to you and you can work out a permanent living arrangement."

"And if we can't work anything out?" Booth asked.

"Well, I will be continuing to check in on you to make sure the safety of the child remains in tact."

Brennan scoffed at that. Right, social workers were all about the "safety of the child." Where the hell were they when she was being abused by her foster parents then?

"Do you have a problem with that, Dr. Brennan?" Mindy wanted to know.

"Well, I –"

"She has a history with social workers," Booth cut her off. "It's nothing personal."

Brennan glared at him, angered.

"Booth," she growled through gritted teeth.

"What kind of history?" Mindy asked intrigued, leaning forward onto her desk.

"I do believe that is none of your business, Ms. Johnson," Brennan replied in a huff, crossing her arms over her chest.

"Actually it is. If this will affect Katie…"

"I was in foster care, okay? Can we please just take our goddaughter home now?"

She _hated_ sharing that kind of information with complete strangers; hell she hated sharing it with _anyone_. She had trusted Booth with this precious information and he had betrayed that trust by sharing it with this woman standing in between her and Katie. It just proved to show how fucked up their relationship had become.

"Will the two of you be residing at the Hodgins' estate then?" Mindy asked, tapping her pen.

Booth and Brennan turned to look at each other. They sighed, and then nodded.

"Excellent. If I could just get you to fill out some paperwork, you can take her home."

Brennan took the pen the woman handed her and stared down at the form in front of her. This was really happening. Angela and Hodgins were really gone and she was moving in with _Booth_ to raise their friends' daughter together. This one, she never saw coming.

* * *

She hadn't cried this much at his funeral. When he had faked his death and Sweets had neglected to tell anyone, she didn't even shed a tear at his fucking funeral. At the time he thought it was because she knew she didn't have any real reason to be sad, but then she had slapped him. And then he learned that she really thought he was dead. It was something that had secretly bothered him for years. Back then, they had meant everything to each other…or so he thought. Booth had always chalked it up to the fact that Brennan tried to compartmentalize everything. But at this particular funeral, she was crying more than the baby she was clutching to her chest like a teddy bear.

He took the seat next to her without saying a word. Cam, Michelle, and Sweets approached them and sat on either side of the ex-partners, also in silence. Behind them sat the row of squinterns, all at a loss now that their partner in crime, Dr. Hodgins, was no longer with them.

"I am so sorry, Cherie," Caroline whispered to Brennan as she took her seat next to Sweets.

Brennan gave her a half smile and then turned her attention to Angela's father, who was taking a seat on the other side of Michelle.

"Sir, about Katie," Brennan started.

"Don't worry about it, Doc. I'm on the road too much to care for a kid. Just don't plan on cutting her out of my life!"

"Oh we won't! We won't…"

She looked down at Katie and the baby smiled back up at her. She had no idea that her parents were dead; no idea that she would never see them again. Booth knew Brennan knew that feeling all too well. He tried to take her hand in his, but she shrugged him off. He sighed and turned to listen as the pastor began the ceremony. She was the same one who had almost married them that first time before Angela learned that she was still married to…that other guy. He and Brennan thought it would be appropriate for her to perform the eulogy.

After the service, Angela's father offered to take Katie off of their hands for a while and Brennan reluctantly complied. The remainder of the Jeffersonian team, Caroline included, stood around the fresh graves.

"This just isn't right," Brennan mumbled. "It's not…"

She choked on a sob and actually allowed Booth to put his arm around her.

"They were so young," Caroline commented. "Still had their lives left to live."

"I'm just glad that you offered to watch Katie," Cam said quietly, rubbing Michelle on the back.

"Me too," she agreed.

Booth looked around at his circle of friends. It felt so empty without Angela and Hodgins there with him. He already missed her contagious smile and laugh as well as his crazy conspiracy theories. It was hard to believe that they were really gone.

Greg…no George…wait Greg…well whatever his name was approached the group.

"This where the party is?" he joked, trying to lighten the mood.

His humor though was obviously lost on Brennan. "I would hardly call this a 'party,' Agent Thompson," she spat, her tone as cold as ice.

"Ah come on Bone Lady, I was just trying to lighten the mood," Greg? Yeah. Greg said, flashing her a smile.

"Do _not_ call me that," she said through gritted teeth.

Booth couldn't help but smile to himself. It didn't seem like all that long ago that she was telling him 'don't call me Bones.' God, what he wouldn't give to go back to that time of his life, to that time of _their lives_.

"Look, now really isn't the time to be harassing Dr. Brennan," Caroline scolded. "You've paid your respect, now go get on with your day."

"Caroline!" Booth exclaimed, holding up his free arm.

"I am a very opinionated person, Booth. Surely you haven't forgotten that."

"Hey it's okay, I can take a hint. I know how you science types like to stick together," Greg said, slowly backing away.

"Squints," Booth heard Brennan say under her breath barely loud enough for even him to hear it.

So he spoke up for her. "They're called squints. Or at least, that's what I used to call them before I really knew them. If you had actually taken the time to get to know your _team_, you'd realize that these people are so much more than 'you science types.' And you'd know that Angela and Hodgins were two of the most big-hearted people you will ever meet. You'd know how much they meant to all of these people. And you'd know better than to use ill-timed sarcastic humor around Dr. Brennan."

"And who are you exactly?" Greg asked, sizing him up.

"Special Agent Seeley Booth. Perhaps you've heard of me?"

Greg's eyes widened at that. "My condolences," he mumbled before quickly walking away.

Booth turned to smile at Brennan, but he was only met with tired eyes. "I can fight my own battles, Booth. You should know that by now." She shrugged out from under his arm. "Excuse me."

He stared at her retreating back in disbelief. The crisp autumn wind gathered up her hair as she walked. Booth smiled to himself, enjoying the fact that it was longer again.

"This is rough on her," Sweets concluded.

"This is rough on all of us," Wendell put in.

"Seeley, you can't be her hero anymore," Cam told him. "You did exactly what I told you not to do: you told her that you loved her and then decided that you didn't mean it."

"I've been so mad at her this past year and then this happens, and I can't even remember what I was mad at her about," Booth said shaking his head. "I just feel like I need to be her hero again, like she needs that stability back in her life."

"She doesn't need saving," Sweets stated. "What she needs is a friend. Her best friend just died and she's probably feeling pretty alone right now."

Booth looked in the direction Brenan had retreated to. She was attempting to take Katie back from the child's grandfather.

"She's lost everyone she's ever really trusted," Sweets continued.

"Hey, I'm still here," Booth protested.

"Yeah but so are her father and brother. Sure they came back, but they left her, just like you did. And you don't see her talking to them on a daily basis now do you?"

"A couple of days ago you weren't even planning on talking to her on Katie's birthday," Cam pointed out. "And now that she's hurting, you suddenly want to be her best friend again? Newsflash, Seeley, she's been hurting ever since you brought back Hannah from Afghanistan. And I think I speak for Angela when I say, you've been treating her like crap for two years. You can't just give her a hug and pretend that none of that ever happened."

Booth scrubbed a hand over his face. "But she…how did I treat her like crap _before_ our falling out? I thought that year was fine."

"You should probably talk to her about that, not us," Cam told him.

"Not that it's any of my business, because it really isn't, but I have quite excellent hearing," Daisy started.

"That's true. She does," Sweets agreed, nodding.

Daisy smiled at him before continuing. "And when we were in Maluku, her room was right next to mine. And I'm pretty sure I heard her calling out your name in her sleep a couple of times. And seeing as how you had a girlfriend over in Afghanistan I doubt you were missing her as much as she was missing you."

"You're right, it's really none of your business," Booth huffed. But he was secretly dying to know _how_ she had said his name. His mind began to swim with the audio of Brennan calling out his name in ecstasy; a sound he hadn't imagined in years.

"I think what all of these people here are trying to say," Caroline started, "is that it's about damn time you and Dr. Brennan get your acts together and apologize already so you can start making precious little children of you own."

"Feeling puckish today are we?" Booth asked drily, touching a hand to his lips. Anytime he heard Caroline use the word puckish he immediately thought of the feeling of Brennan's lips against his. He couldn't figure out why that mistletoe moment still affected him so much, but it did. "Look, I'll try to talk to her, _really_ talk to her, all right? But you all know how stubborn the two of us are, so I can't promise you anything."

"That's all we ask," Sweets said. "If you two plan on raising Katie together, you two really should get along."

Oh crap. He had completely forgotten about that. He was moving in with Brennan and Katie _tomorrow_. They had both agreed to keep their apartments, just in case, but still. This was a big step. And Sweets was definitely right, they needed to start getting along and fast. He looked back over at Brennan to find her treating Katie to the "joys of spatial disorientation." And for a split second he remembered what it was exactly that had made him fall in love.

* * *

**AN: Reviews are the key to my soul...or heart...whatever. **


	4. Little Lion Man

_But it was not your fault but mine._

_And it was your heart on the line._

_I really fucked it up this time._

_Didn't I, my dear? Didn't I, my dear?_

* * *

A suitcase and a duffle bag. It was all she had traveled with in foster care and it was all she had packed to move today. She was sure that their new living arrangement wouldn't last long and she'd be back in the comfort of her own apartment in no time.

Brennan stood outside of Hodgin's house trying to will herself to go inside. She knew the moment she entered that house she would be flooded with memories, accompanied by pain. She couldn't handle anymore pain right now; she just wanted her friends back. Taking a deep breath, she finally managed to open the front door. She was greeted by Booth who immediately put a finger to his lips when he saw her.

"I just got Katie down for her nap," Booth explained softly.

Brennan nodded and quietly closed the door behind her.

"That all you brought?" Booth asked, gesturing to her luggage.

"It's all I need," Brennan shrugged. "When you travel as often as I do, you learn to pack light."

"This isn't a vacation, Bren, it's our life."

Brennan crossed her arms over her chest. "I still don't see why this was necessary. Our apartments would have sufficed."

"We're doing this for Katie. It'll be easier on her this way."

"She's one. She won't remember ever living here. And if you're implying it will be easier on her to not have to go back and forth between our apartments, look at Parker; he turned out fine."

"They left Katie _everything_ and they left her to us, so basically they left _us_ everything. It's Angela's sick way of pushing us together from beyond the grave. Besides, this place is way nicer than my apartment…and yours."

Brennan sighed, drawing her duffle bag higher up on her shoulder.

"It just doesn't feel right being here," she confessed, catching a glimpse of a framed photo of the couple from a few years ago. Her chest constricted with pain recalling the day the photo had been taken. The Jeffersonian had hosted a company picnic and the whole team had been in attendance. In fact, her favorite photo of her and Booth and been taken on that same day. And currently that photo was stashed in the back of her closet…

"I know…I know it doesn't feel like our home yet, but that's because our stuff isn't here and theirs is."

"_Our home_?" Brennan repeated. "You're actually considering permanently living here…with me?"

"Well, like I said it's a hell of a lot nicer than my place. And we can't sell it because it belongs to Katie and not us."

"But you'd actually want to live here _with me_? We don't get along, Booth."

"We used to."

Brennan looked him directly in the eyes for the first time in what seemed like years. That old spark of theirs danced behind his amber orbs. She felt her chest constrict with pain again, but this time for entirely different reasons.

"Oh! I got you something, sort of like a housewarming present," Booth said, scurrying into the kitchen.

"Booth, you didn't have to –" Brennan started after him, leaving her luggage in the middle of the foyer.

He reappeared brandishing a large bouquet of daffodils. Brennan gasped as she took them from him and brought them up to her nose to inhale their scent.

"You remembered," she whispered, feeling a blush color her cheeks. "Thank you."

"I thought they might make the place feel homier," Booth shrugged. "So which guest bedroom do you want?"

"It doesn't matter to me," she replied, aimlessly fingering one of the petals. "But I'd prefer the one closer to Katie's room."

"So then it _does_ matter to you."

Brennan laughed lightly. "Yeah I guess it does."

"I know this is going to be hard, but we can do this, Brennan. And someday, everything is actually going to be okay again."

"I hope you're right, Booth. I really do."

* * *

It was around one in the morning when Booth got up to use the bathroom. On his way back to bed, he noticed Brennan standing outside of Katie's room, watching her sleep.

"Is this why you wanted the room closer to her?" Booth asked, coming up behind her.

She startled at the sound of his voice, not expecting him to be up.

"Do you think she knows?" Brennan asked instead of answering him.

"That her parents are gone?"

She nodded without taking her gaze off of the child.

"Probably. But I bet she just thinks that we're watching her. She doesn't know they're never coming back."

"I thought Russ was just watching me. I failed to believe that they were really gone. And then Russ left me too…that's when I knew. That's when I knew that nobody cared about me."

Booth was taken aback by her openness. In the past, it would have been a standard comment in this situation. But with their current tension and issues, he was very surprised that she had so willingly opened up like that. Her past was a very sensitive subject for her.

"Hey, people care about you –"

She didn't let him finish. "I want Katie to know that she has people who care about her. Even though her parents are…I just don't ever want her to know what it's like to feel completely alone."

He wanted to hug her, but he was afraid she would just reject his comfort like she had at the funeral.

"We'll make sure she knows," he said softly.

Brennan turned around and nearly ran into him, not realizing he was so close to her.

"Well I'm going back to bed," she said, side-stepping around him.

He knew he should've left well enough alone, but he just couldn't help himself. "When was the last time that you felt completely alone?"

"Booth…" she trailed off, running a hand through her hair.

"I'm serious. When you were in foster care? College? What?"

"It's late. I'm not getting into this with you right now."

"What is there to get into? It's a simple question."

"It's not that simple. And the fact that you can't see that…you know I had really thought that things had gone back to normal today, but now I realize that nothing's changed."

Booth grabbed her by the arm and dragged her away from Katie's room. He was afraid that their arguing was going to wake her. Brennan pushed him off of her in a manner that he found more aggressive than she needed to be.

"Nothing's changed?" he spat. "_Everything's _changed. Angela and Hodgins are _dead_. They're dead and they left their daughter to us. So here we are, living in _their_ house, raising _their_ child, _together_. How is that _anything_ like the way it was before?"

"You're still an ass," Brennan said bluntly.

"Excuse me?"

"The guy I used to know? He wasn't anything like you. Sure he knew that daffodils were my favorite flower and he was good with kids, but he always seemed to know exactly what was wrong with me, sometimes even before I did. And you can't even figure out when the last time I felt completely alone was. And he would pull me into his arms and hold me when he knew that I was having a bad day. He couldn't stand to see me sad or upset. He was in love with me. And you know I would really like that guy back because he was my best friend. But that's never going to happen because he died. He went to Afghanistan and he never came back."

Booth stood with his mouth open in shock, unable to do anything besides stand there and watch Brennan cry.

"Forget it," Brennan whispered, turning on her heel. "I'm going to bed."

"You never answered my question," Booth said, staring at her retreating back.

"Oh but I did," she said without turning around.

Booth was silent waiting for her to continue. He wasn't sure why he was torturing himself like this. This past year he'd done nothing but blame her for their falling out. Now, however, he realized that he was entirely to blame for everything that had happened. And with each biting, desperate word Brennan spoke tonight, he felt like she was stabbing him directly in the heart.

"You really want to know?" Brennan asked, turning to face him again.

"Yes."

"Fine. Now. Angela is dead. Hodgins is dead. You… I feel alone right now. I felt alone when I was in Maluku. I felt alone every single night that you spent with _her_. I felt alone when we stopped speaking. But even through all of that, I still had Angela and Hodgins. And now, I have no one. Katie and I are alike in that respect. Angela and Hodgins didn't just abandon her, they abandoned _me_. Just like every other person in my life who I ever truly cared about."

And then Booth was forced to watch helplessly as Brennan's knees buckled under her and she fell to the ground crying harder than he'd ever witnessed. Not being able to stand it anymore, he crawled to her and gathered her up in his arms. She clung to him like she had so many times in the past.

But this time was different than all of those times before. He hadn't just saved her life nor had she just saved his. She hadn't just returned home after one of her trips. This wasn't just another guy hug.

This time she was openly expressing a vulnerability that was entirely new to both of them. This time was a result of one of their bitter fights. And this time he could feel the genuine pain radiating from her.

So Booth did the only thing her could. He held Brennan in his arms as she completely broke right before his own eyes. He berated himself for letting it come to this. How had he not known that she'd been hurting this bad? She was right; the guy he used to be would have never let this all get so out of control.

Booth estimated that 15 minutes had passed before she finally started to calm down. Her shoulders stopped shaking so violently, but she still shivered in his arms. Brennan made no effort to move and he wondered if this was her silent form of forgiveness.

"Thank you," she whispered, wiping at her eyes.

"You're not alone, Brennan. You were never alone."

He felt her tense up at that.

"What is it?" he asked, gently.

"It's nothing," she responded, shrugging him off.

And just like that, her mood had changed again.

"It's never 'nothing' with you," Booth told her, watching her get to her feet.

"Do you realize that you have been calling me Brennan ever since that night at Founding Fathers?"

"That's your name."

"Not to you it isn't." Brennan shifted her gaze to the floor. "Look, thank you for listening tonight, Booth. I really am going to make it to bed this time. Good night."

"Good night, Bones."

He heard her draw in a sharp breath as her old nickname escaped his lips.

"Say it again," she whispered, pausing in her doorway.

"Good night, Bones."

He saw her nod her head a couple of times before she closed her bedroom door on him. She was right yet again; he hadn't called her Bones since that night when their relationship had turned to shit. And he had done it on purpose; hoping that distancing himself from her by taking away his name for her would make it all hurt less. However, while it had helped him, it had only served to hurt her more.

Booth hadn't been thinking that night. He had been drunk and was tired of getting turned down by the women he loved. And Brennan had been there, ready to pick up the pieces Hannah had left. Up until now he had been pushing the real reason he had first hooked up with Hannah out of his head. But now the memory came flooding back, and he was dreading the day he would have to tell Brennan. Booth reasoned that he better do it soon while things were still on edge between them. Because if he waited until they were their old selves again, his world would once again come crashing down around him.

* * *

When Booth came down to the kitchen the next morning, Brennan was already up trying to get Katie to eat something that looked like applesauce. All traces of her breakdown from the night before were gone. Her hair was wet from the shower and the ends were curling around her shoulders. It made him realize how much he'd missed seeing her wear her hair curly.

"Come on Katie, you love applesauce," Brennan coaxed.

The child knocked the spoon out of Brennan's hand and giggled as the applesauce splattered all over her highchair.

"Morning, Bones," Booth greeted, trying to stifle his laughter.

Brennan sent him a desperate look. "I can't get her to eat anything."

"Here, let me try," Booth said, taking the cup of applesauce from her. "Parker went through this phase too. You just have to get creative." He loaded up the spoon again and turned to Katie. "Here comes the airplane, ready to come in for landing."

Booth made some plane noises, but Katie only stared at him.

"I feel like she's looking at me like I'm crazy," he commented.

"I know I am," Brennan said.

Booth turned to face her, crossing his arms over his chest in the process, and forgetting about the overflowing spoon of applesauce. It splattered down his shirt.

"You have something…umm…" Brennan was trying so hard not to laugh.

Booth groaned and moved to the sink to get a wet washcloth. "I'm glad this is so entertaining for you."

"Just watching the expert at work," she smiled.

Booth couldn't remember the last time she had smiled like that. It seemed like it had been forever since he'd last made her happy.

"Ha, like you were doing any better," Booth teased.

"Hey, at least I managed to keep the food off of myself."

A devilish grin spread across his face as he made his way back to the applesauce.

"What are you doing?" Brennan asked, slightly worried.

Booth loaded up the spoon again, but instead of trying to feed it to Katie, he flung it at Brennan.

"Booth!" she shrieked as it splattered her nice shirt. "This shirt is dry clean only!"

"Why are wearing that on a Sunday? Especially around a baby…who is messy…"

"She isn't the only one who's messy," Brennan mumbled, going to retrieve the wet washcloth.

"I mean seriously, Bones, it's not like you go to church."

"I just felt like wearing this today, okay?"

"Oh come on, that can't be comfortable," Booth started moving over to her. "You don't always have to look perfect, Bones." He gripped the sink on either side of her. "And you certainly don't have to dress up just for me."

She looked him directly in the eyes and he instantly felt their old sexual tension spark between them.

"Who said that I was dressing up for you?" Brennan asked without breaking their gaze.

"Got a hot date?"

She shook her head.

"Well I bet Katie really appreciates it then."

"I should probably go try to feed her again now."

"I bet she'll appreciate that too."

And yet she made no move to move away from him. Her gaze was locked onto his, unwavering. _God, this woman_, Booth thought as she bit down on her lower lip. He was so incredibly turned on right now and all she was doing was standing there.

"Are you going to move?" Brennan asked at last.

"Oh sorry," Booth muttered, practically stumbling out of her way. Her shoulder brushed against his as she passed.

"So Halloween is coming up," Brennan mentioned casually, pouring some cereal onto Katie's highchair table. Katie happily popped a Cheerio into her mouth.

"So it is. Bringing out the good ol' Wonder Woman costume again?"

"It is tradition."

"You look hot in it," Booth said, without thinking.

Brennan threw him a questioning look.

"Not that you don't look hot all of time because let's face it, you're hot."

Brennan drew her eyebrows together in that manner that he believed only belonged to her.

"What?"

"Nothing," Brennan shrugged, turning her attention back to Katie. She quickly turned back to face him, however. "It's just…no never mind."

"Okay seriously? What did I say? It was a compliment, Bren." He noticed her flinch like she had last night when he had called her that. "I mean Bones."

"Just forget it. Anyway, I was just wondering if Katie was old enough to partake in the festivities. I mean I know she's a little young for candy, but Angela and Hodgins dressed her up in that bizarre looking pumpkin costume last year and…" she trailed off at the memory, no doubt thinking about how her friends weren't here anymore to dress their daughter in ridiculous outfits.

"We can find a costume for her, take her trick-or-treating, keep the candy for ourselves…"

"Or we could bring Parker along and let him have her candy."

"What, are you too old for Halloween candy now? And besides, I've seen the stash that Parker halls in every year, he doesn't need anymore."

Brennan laughed lightly as she poured some more Cheerios onto Katie's highchair. "Well whatever. It was just a thought."

"No, no it's good. An attempt to get some normalcy back into our lives," Booth agreed stealing a Cheerio from Katie's stash. She looked up at him and made a pouty face. He couldn't help but laugh as he replaced his stolen Cheerio with a new one from the box. Katie seemed to find this satisfactory as she continued to eat her cereal.

"Have our lives ever been normal?" Brennan asked.

"Depends on your definition of the word," Booth smirked.

She smiled back and moved to put away the box of Cheerios. Booth sighed contently, thinking for the first time that this may all actually work out after all.

* * *

**AN: Review pretty please with a sexy Booth…or Brennan on top…or bottom? **


	5. The Scientist

_I was just guessing at numbers and figures pulling the puzzles apart._

_Questions of science, of science and progress do not speak as loud as my heart._

_Tell me you love me come back and haunt me oh, and I rush to the start._

_I'm going back to the start. _

* * *

Death was something she dealt with everyday. Day in and day out she stared at human remains, determining the cause of death and identity of the victim. She gave the dead a voice and their families closure. Children, adults, double homicides, she'd seen it all. Brennan wouldn't go as far as to say that none of it bothered her anymore, because it did, but things had certainly improved. It had become routine, normal, something she couldn't escape. She had gotten use to death plaguing her daily routine.

And yet this was different. This was like the time she had discovered her mother's body in limbo, but it was ten times worse. Brennan had always assumed that her parents were dead since they never came back for her. So finding out that her mother really had been murdered wasn't as big of a shock as it could have been.

Losing Angela and Hodgins, on the other hand…hours before they had been taken from her, she had seen them, spoken with them, and laughed with them at their house. She hadn't been ready for them to leave her too. Her rational side couldn't figure out why their deaths were affecting her so much, when death was so common in her life. But then she would hear Angela's voice in her head telling her, _It's because you loved us, sweetie_.

Brennan closed her eyes and bit down on her lower lip, trying to fight back the tears. She'd been standing outside of the Jeffersonian for ten minutes, trying to will herself to go inside. It was her first day back and she just wasn't sure if she could handle it. Their offices would still be exactly the way they had left them; smack dab in the middle of solving a case. And she just couldn't…

"Dr. Brennan?"

She turned to the sound of Sweet's timid voice.

"Dr. Sweets," she replied flatly.

"First day back?" He knew it was. He was just using that stupid psychology she hated so much on her to try and fix her. It wouldn't work.

"You know it is."

"How are things with Katie?"

"She's fine."

"And Agent Booth?"

"We're fine. Look is there something you wanted other than to use your psychobabble on me out here on the middle of the sidewalk?"

"Well Cam –"

"Noticed that I've been standing out here a while and called you in to see if you could help? Well you can't. Not unless you can bring my best friend and her husband back, you can't. And seeing as how we buried them, that's physically impossible. Now if you'll excuse me, I have a job to do."

She pushed through the main doors of the institute without looking back, just trying to get away from him. Subconsciously, she knew that this had been his plan all along, but she refused to acknowledge the fact that it had actually worked on her.

The lab seemed larger than usual. Perhaps it was because it felt so empty. Brennan just wanted to run to her office and hide there, but she soon realized that either path she took to get there would force her to pass either Angela's or Hodigns' office and she just wasn't ready for that yet.

"Dr. Brennan! Welcome back!" Cam greeted from her place on the platform.

Brennan just sighed in response and made her way up to meet Cam. Clark was busy examining what appeared to be a new set of remains beside her.

"New case?" Brennan asked.

"Uh, yes," Cam started. "We found what they had been working on in their offices and it was umm…enough. Case closed. Mr. Edison, care to catch Dr. Brennan up on what you're working on?"

"Of course," Clark replied. "Male. Mid to late thirties. There are compression fractures on the L3 through L6 vertebrae. There also appears to be remodeling of the right radius and ulna, suggesting a severe break that occurred about 5 years ago. Cause of death is yet to be determined."

She barely heard Clark as he listed the victim's multiple injuries. She was too stuck on the fact that they had gone into her friends' offices and used whatever they had been working on that night to solve the previous case. Hodgins thought he had discovered some new plant species again and he had been so obsessed with trying to ID it, that his last trip home from the lab had proved fatal. Brennan figured Angela had finished the facial reconstruction in the time it had taken her husband to ID the mysterious plant. In the end it just wasn't worth it. She'd rather be stuck with an unsolved murder case than feel as alone and abandoned as she did right then.

"Dr. Brennan?" she heard Clark calling her name.

"Right. Sounds great. You've got this one under control." Without much thinking, Brennan walked off of the platform and headed for Angela's office. She faintly heard Cam calling after her as she approached the artist's space.

As she had suspected, the office looked unchanged. The Angelator hummed softly in the background as Brennan picked up the family photo sitting on her desk. Katie was riding on Hodgins' shoulders as Angela looked at the two of them lovingly. She had taken that photograph four months ago on Independence Day. Placing the frame back in its designated spot, she spotted an old picture of her and Angela. It had been taken years ago, and she couldn't help but think about how young they both looked. Clutching the photograph to her chest, Brennan moved over to the couch and sank down onto the cushions.

She couldn't figure out how she could live so easily in their home, while simply being in Angela's office was upsetting her so badly. What was it about this place? Brennan brought the photograph up to her face for examination as she felt another wave of tears sting her eyes. She couldn't keep going on like this; she just needed the pain to stop.

* * *

"Excuse me, Agent Booth?"

Booth looked up from his pile of neglected paperwork to find Greg standing in his doorway.

"Need help on a case, buddy?" Booth asked drily.

"Well…no. With your partner actually."

Booth snorted. "She hasn't been my partner in over a year. She's _your partner_ now. Whatever it is she's trying to do; just let her do it. It's how she works."

"That's just it; she's not trying to do _anything_. I've got the bosses breathing down my neck on this case and she's refusing to come out of that artist's office."

"_That artist_ has a name," Booth ground out through gritted teeth. He ran a hand over his face. "Did she tell you why she won't leave? Why she's not working? She seemed completely fine this morning when we left the house…"

"I uh…I didn't ask."

"Why not?"

"Dr. Brennan…well…she scares me."

Booth had to laugh at that. "Are we talking about the same Dr. Brennan here? The woman who is terrified of snakes and loves the Smurfs?"

"I don't know those kinds of things about her. All that I know is that she tries to bite my head off every time I so much as enter her precious lab."

Brennan had never been that strict about him being in the lab before. Maybe when they first started out as partners, sure, but it hadn't taken her long to give him an access card for the lab. He wasn't sure if that made him special or if he'd hurt her one too many times for her to trust FBI agents.

"So what do you want me to do exactly?"

"Well, none of her people can seem to coax her out of there, so we were hoping that maybe you could say something to her?"

Booth looked down at his backlog of paperwork. He guessed he would have to put it off even longer. Sighing, he followed Greg out of his office and over to the Jeffersonian.

* * *

She was lying on Angela's couch with her back to the door when he found her. She was holding something that looked like a picture frame in her arms.

"Bones?"

She didn't move so he walked over to the couch and knelt down beside her.

"Bones?" he tried again. Still, he received no response. "Hey, what happened? You were doing fine when we left this morning. And yesterday? Things felt almost normal then."

"Depends on your definition of the word," she parroted his previous day's response.

"Hey," he whispered, reaching out to rub her back. "Let me be that guy who holds you when he knows you're having a bad day."

She rolled over to look at him then, her baby blue eyes rimmed red from crying.

"Because guess what?" Booth continued when she still didn't say anything. "They found him over there in Afghanistan. He wasn't dead, just suffering from some short term amnesia. And he would really like to be your best friend who loves you again if you let him."

Wordlessly, Brennan sat up on the couch, making room for him. She set the picture frame on the floor and he noticed it was an old shot of her and Angela. He sat down beside her before pulling her into his lap. She wrapped her arms around his torso, letting her head fall onto his shoulder. Booth held her close to him, relieved that she was letting him do this.

"I don't know why it hurts so much to be here," Brennan confessed.

"Maybe it was too soon for you to come back?"

"But why am I okay living in their house?"

"Because Katie's there. She's your daughter now, Bones. Your maternal instincts are trying to keep you strong for your daughter."

"But she's –"

"No, it doesn't matter that you're not her biological mother. We're not your foster parents. We actually love her; we would never hurt her. We're all she has left." Booth began rubbing small circles on her back. "So when you're here at work, Katie's not around for you to be strong for. You're finally allowing your mind to fully comprehend what happened. It's nothing to be ashamed of, Bones. We lost our friends."

"You don't seem to be nearly as upset as I am."

"That's because I'm trying to be strong for you."

"You don't need to –"

"Yes, I do. If we both fall apart at once, who will take care of Katie?"

"The nanny's taking care of her right now," Brennan stated, lifting her head to look into his eyes.

Booth rested his forehead against hers and he could tell she was a bit taken aback by the intimate gesture. However, she made no effort to move away from him.

"I just hate that they're gone. I hate that they left Katie, and us, and…you. I hate that with Angela gone, you feel like you have no one. You've got to know that that's not true, Bren…Bones. You have to know that I…"

"What?" Brennan asked, pulling back to look at him.

"I was going to say that I'll be there for you no matter what, but look how good I've been at keeping that promise."

"I'd say that you've been quite excellent at it."

"Ha. Right."

"I'm serious. Ever since they…you've been here for me. You put away your anger and resentment, and all of your bitter fighting words, and… you've been there. You're here now. And I know I haven't been too accepting of your comfort, but…thank you." Brennan settled against his chest again. "Thank you."

As Booth held her, he felt all of the emotions he'd been suppressing overcome him. There was just something about her that made him crack. He tried to think back to the last time he had cried in front of her and he couldn't remember. Brennan gently wiped the tears from his face.

"Witnessing you cry isn't in my definition of normal," she said softly.

"Well I guess we're just not there then yet."

"Booth?"

"Yeah Bones?"

"I'm glad you got your memory back." She reminded him of a child the way she said it. It was such a simple statement and she just seemed so childlike wrapped up in his arms. "Because I don't think I could handle you being dead still too."

Booth placed a soft kiss on the top of her head. "I'm not going anywhere, Bones. I promise."

* * *

Twenty minutes later, Booth and Brennan finally emerged from Angela's office. Brennan quietly made her way up to the platform to assist Clark, and Cam approached Booth before he had the chance to leave.

"What did you say to her?" she asked.

"To calm her down?"

Cam nodded.

"I just…I held her."

"And she actually let you do that?"

"Well yeah."

"Have you two talked yet?" Cam asked.

"Sort of," Booth replied.

"Seeley…"

"She talked. I listened. Listen Camille, I know you're trying to help, but don't you think you should back off a little?"

"I'm just trying to protect her. With Angela gone…"

"With Angela gone, she has me."

"You're exactly what I'm trying to protect her from! I know you, Seeley, don't forget that."

"Look, I'm not going to hurt her again, okay?"

"But you still haven't _talked_ to her. How do you know that what you have to say won't hurt her? Take it from the woman who was your substitute Brennan for a year, it's going to hurt her."

"So, maybe I just don't tell her."

"Oh that's a great way to start a relationship, keeping things from each other."

"I can't tell her, Camille, you said it yourself. She can't know. She'll…she'll never forgive me for that."

"Which is why you should tell her now, before things get too serious."

"I can't tell her now. Things are finally good between us again, I can't ruin that."

"So what are you going to do when she finds out years from now and you two have kids of your own?"

"Okay first of all, getting a little ahead of ourselves aren't we? And secondly, how is she going to find out if I don't tell her?"

"Dr. Saroyan, you might want to come take a look at this," Clark told her.

"We're not done discussing this," Cam said to Booth before joining Clark and Brennan on the platform.

"Oh I think we're plenty done!" Booth called after her.

At that comment, Brennan looked up from the remains to meet his gaze.

"I'm going to head back to the Hoover, if that's okay," he told her.

"It's fine. This isn't your case, anyway."

Booth felt a pang in his chest at that. This used to be _his _team; these were _his _squints. The problems were that he was two squints short, two friends short, he'd allowed his partner to trade him in like a used car, he didn't work Bones' cases anymore, and he was keeping things from the woman he was living with.

"Man, what I wouldn't give to go back," Booth muttered, as he exited the lab. "This does not fit my definition of the word normal…"

* * *

"Booth, hurry up! We're going to be late!"

Brennan stood in the foyer checking her Wonder Woman costume in the mirror. It was Halloween night and she and Booth were taking Katie trick-or-treating with Parker and Rebecca.

"Calm down! Parker and Rebecca are meeting us here. It's impossible for us to be late."

"We'll be late of you're not ready," Brennan stated, turning around to face him.

Booth was dressed as a vampire and held Katie dressed up as a bunny.

"You look ridiculous," she told him. "Vampires aren't even real."

"And Wonder Woman is?" Booth asked as the doorbell rang.

Brennan glared at him, taking Katie from his arms as he moved to answer the door. He was greeted by a zombie Parker and Rebecca dressed in scrubs.

"Going as a nurse, Becs?" he asked her.

"A surgeon, thank you very much," Rebecca corrected. "And hello to you too."

"Cool dad! We're both going as dead things!" Parker exclaimed.

"Vampires aren't dead. Are they?" Booth asked, turning to Brennan.

"Why are you asking me?"

"Because you know everything. Or at least you pretend too…"

"If I wasn't holding the baby, I would hit you."

Booth smirked at her and turned back to Rebecca. "So where's Captain Fantastic tonight?"

"Seeley," Rebecca chastised. "He's at home handing out candy."

"We're just leaving ours out on the porch along with this sign that says 'Please take one,'" Brennan explained.

"Bones, you know that's not going to work. The first kid that gets here is going to dump the whole thing into his bag," Booth told her.

"That wouldn't be very polite."

"Kids aren't polite."

"It's true," Parker agreed. "When it comes to candy, we'll do anything to get tons of it."

"So, ready to go?" Rebecca asked.

"Yes, let's," Booth said picking up the candy bowl and placing it on the porch. "Might as well give one kid a lucky night."

"Can that kid be me?" Parker asked.

"Parks, you're probably going to end up with most of Katie's candy too, so I'm going to say no," Booth told him.

"Dang. Hey! Can I push Katie's stroller up to the houses with me? Women love a man with a baby."

"Parker!" Rebecca exclaimed.

"What? I just want more candy…"

"Ah, let him do it, Becs," Booth said.

"Fine, but you're paying his dental bill next time."

Parker took Katie's stroller from Brennan and walked up to the first house on the street.

"So, how are things going for you guys?" Rebecca asked.

"Oh, they're going," Booth responded.

"Katie causing you any trouble?"

"Well, the only thing she'll eat is cereal," Brennan started.

"And there was the other night, when she would not sleep and she just kept crying," Booth added.

"Oh yeah, that was not fun."

"And you two are getting along okay?" Rebecca asked.

Booth and Brennan shot each other a look.

"Yeah, we're good," Booth told her.

Parker came running back to the group of adults. "This neighborhood rocks! They're giving out full size candy bars!"

"Yeah well, the people here _are_ loaded," Booth commented.

They started to move down the street when Brennan grabbed Booth's arm and pulled him aside.

"What's up, Bones?"

"It's just…this feels normal."

"Yeah, it does. But that's a good thing isn't it?"

"I suppose…"

"Hey," Booth started, grabbing her shoulders. "You can't feel guilty for being happy. They wouldn't want you to live the rest of your life being miserable for them."

"I know," Brennan said softly.

"Come on, let's go catch up to them." Brennan nodded and followed after him. "Oh and by the way, Bones, you still look _hot_ in that costume."

She couldn't help but laugh. Booth was right, she couldn't be miserable forever.

* * *

AN: Some of you have mentioned that it seems like B&B are making up real fast at an unnatural rate after what happened, but believe me, things are far from fixed. This huge tragedy happened and they both just really need someone to be there right now. Fear not, the angst is far from over.

Shout out to peeps catching the nods to _Angel _and_ Grey's Anatomy_! You guys are the bestest. Keep on being the bestest and leave a review maybe?


	6. Something in Common

_So beginning tonight well you can change your mind._

_You know it's never too late. _

_You're gonna be alright, alright._

_So come on we can trust, there's something in common between us. _

_Oh come on we can find, there's something in common between our lives. _

* * *

How was it November? Angela and Hodgins and been gone for a month. She and Booth had been living together civilly for a month. They had been raising Katie together…for a month. She just couldn't comprehend how quickly things had changed.

It was Sunday and Brennan was currently sitting on the couch watching some ridiculous children's program with Katie. She certainly didn't understand how "The Wiggles" were in any way beneficial to the child.

"And now they're singing again," Brennan groaned.

"Ah come on, Bones," Booth laughed, entering the room. "Their music is really awesome."

"I beg to differ."

He joined them on the couch, still laughing at the whole situation. "I never thought I would see the day when Dr. Temperance Brennan started watching 'The Wiggles.'"

"I'm not watching it; Katie is. I'm just sitting here with her."

"Really? What's the episode about?"

"Shapes and colors, which, if you ask me, have absolutely no correlation. Just because you're teaching the child the color red, doesn't mean you need to take the opportunity to also teach them about the heart shape which looks absolutely nothing like the real human heart."

"At least real hearts are red. It's not like they're teaching them hearts along with the color blue."

"It's still ridiculous."

"She's one, Bones. Would you rather force her to watch the Discovery Channel?"

"I tried. She didn't appear to enjoy it."

Booth burst into another fit of laughter.

"I'm glad you find this so entertaining," Brennan said, rolling her eyes.

"I'm sorry! Sorry, I'll change the subject. What case are you working on now?"

"I am not at liberty to discuss the case with you, seeing as how it's not yours."

"It's _me_, Bones. I was your partner for six years. I'm still FBI."

The words hit her hard. _I _was _your partner for six years_. For six years he had stood by her side and she by his. She'd been allowed to interview suspects and was involved with 100 percent of the case. These days, all she ever saw was the inside of the lab besides the initial discovery of the body. Greg was certainly no Booth. He just didn't understand her the way Booth did; nor had he tried. To him, she was just another squint, not his friend.

"Well you're not my partner anymore," Brennan finally said.

"And that was your decision," Booth told her.

"No, it was yours," she reminded him.

Booth sighed. "Look I really don't want to get into this right now."

"What is there to get into? I'm right; you're wrong, end of story."

"You're the one who chose to leave, Brennan!'

"And you're the one who gave me the ultimatum!"

Katie began to cry in Brennan's arms.

"Now look what you did," she chastised, standing up and bouncing Katie around in her arms.

"Me? How is this my fault?" Booth asked, standing up next to her.

"Will you just stop trying to pick a fight with me? Come on, Booth we've moved passed this."

"Have we? I mean, if we're still acting like this, there still has to be some unresolved issues somewhere."

"Okay, so what are they? What's keeping us on edge with each other?"

Booth sighed. "I don't know."

"Well neither do I."

Brennan returned to her spot on the couch, still rocking Katie in an effort to calm her down. Booth stood staring at them for a moment, before sitting back down as well. He leaned back into the cushions, scrubbing a hand over his face. In theory, he knew what was off between them: they were both still in love with each other, but were both just too damn stubborn to admit it.

"It's a child's case," Brennan spoke up. "Judging by the teeth, the child is around the age of 7. At that age, it's hard to be certain about sex, because they have yet to reach puberty, but I'm pretty sure it's female. Our new artist, on the other hand, is certain the child is male based off of my tissue markers. She's an idiot. Can't she notice that the child has a rounded jaw, a non-prominent brow line, and high cheekbones? Those are all female skull characteristics. And don't even get me started on the incompetency of our new entomologist. I told Cam not to hire them, but did she listen to me? No. All of it just makes me want to run off and search for hominids instead. Katie is the only thing really keeping me here."

At the mention of her name, Katie looked up at Brennan. Her crying had stopped and she now wiggled anxiously in Brennan's arms. So Brennan put her down on the floor where she crawled over to her ball and began batting it around the living room.

"How's Greg?" Booth asked, needing to know if he had indeed been replaced.

"He won't let me be involved in the investigation beyond the lab. And I feel like he's afraid of me…"

"Oh, he is. He said, and I quote, 'she tries to bite my head off every time I so much as enter her precious lab.'"

Brennan sighed, burying her head in her hands. "I used to love my job, but now I'm starting to hate it."

Booth reached over to rub her back. "Would things be better if I came back?"

Brennan lifted her head up to meet his gaze. "If you came back, we would be around each other practically 24/7."

"What, don't think we could handle that?"

"I don't…we could always try couldn't we? And if it doesn't work out…I don't want to say that I _need_ you there, but…I really do need you there."

"I'll talk to Hacker. I know he still has a soft spot for you, so I'm sure he'll oblige."

"Thank you," Brennan said barely above a whisper.

"It's no problem. It'll be good to be back with my old team again."

"What's left of us."

Booth draped his arm around her shoulders. "Things will be better once I'm back and can take you out of that lab." When Brennan simply nodded in response, Booth continued. "So, uh, now that this is my case after all, do you have a cause of death yet?"

"Strangulation."

"Any suspects?"

"We don't even know who she is yet, Booth. Like I said, that damn artist is convinced she's a he. And since I can't get her to create an accurate sketch, we have nothing to release to the media. And the entomologist can't remember which part of Virginia the insects he found on her are indigenous from. _And_ we have yet to find a botanist, so the pollen spores we have are useless. The fact that we've solved any cases at all since their deaths is a miracle."

"And these people were the best that Cam could find?"

Brennan shrugged shaking her head.

"Well this is unfortunate," Booth quipped.

Brennan felt a laugh bubbling up from her throat, but stopped it when she realized she and Booth had been fighting the same tired fight mere minutes ago and were now sitting with his arm draped around her.

"Booth," she started tentatively, "how is it that we can be fighting one minute and then be like this the next? We've been experiencing these little mood swings ever since we became friends again."

"Like I said, Bones. We just have a lot of unresolved issues. And clearly they all stem out of our rejections of one another. I think we just need to move pass it all; start fresh."

"And how do you suggest we do that?"

"Well," Booth started, moving closer to her. "Perhaps we could…where's Katie?"

"What?"

Booth gestured to the floor in front of them where Katie's ball sat all by itself. "She was right there and now…"

Brennan's face grew ashen. "I haven't put the baby gates up yet this morning."

The two jumped to their feet and began calling out her name as they searched the main floor for her. After a few minutes they found her in the foyer, using the basket full of umbrellas to help her stand.

"She's standing!" Booth exclaimed. "Has she ever done that before?"

"Well, developmentally speaking, she should be walking by now. But I suppose the trauma could have set her back a month or two."

"_Or_ she's just a slow developer."

"That's ridiculous. Have you met her parents? This child is bound to be a genius."

"Bones –"

"I'm serious, Booth. Angela was more than just an artist. She had a knack for technology. You've seen the things she's been able to do. And Hodgins, he had several doctorates in various areas. Therefore, Katie –"

"No, no, no, Bones. Look!"

Brennan looked back down at Katie. She had let go of her basket crutch and was standing all on her own. She attempted to take a few steps forward, but she fell almost instantly. Katie looked up at Booth and Brennan with wide eyes. Brennan bent down to scoop her up in her arms.

"Katie, that was so good! I told Booth you were smart!"

"Why don't you put her down and let her try again, Bones? She didn't get very far."

Brennan did, but Katie merely started to crawl away from them.

"Apparently she doesn't perform well in front of an audience," Booth joked.

"Well, it's no matter. She has plenty of time to succeed. Oh, should we be looking into preschools for her?"

"Preschool? Already?"

"Yes, I hear you have to apply early if you want to get into the best ones. And Katie deserves the best. Giving her a head start at learning is key."

"Have you been reading those parenting books again?"

"Booth, I'm serious!"

"So am I. Rebecca and I started Parker in preschool when he was three and it was nothing fancy. He's turned out just fine."

"Well sure, but I want Katie to be more than 'fine;' I want her to be extraordinary."

Booth simply sighed having no real response to that. He wandered off in the direction that Katie had crawled, realizing that they had allowed her to crawl away from them again and that the baby gates were still not set up.

"Whatever you want, Bones," Booth called over his shoulder.

"Hey now, don't use that tone with me. I've known you long enough to recognize that you're being derisive."

Booth chuckled to himself as he found Katie back in the living room playing with her ball again. He had never felt quite so…domestic.

* * *

The next morning, Brennan sat in her office staring at the sketches Annah had given her. She'd finally convinced the stubborn artist that the skeleton was indeed female and she had fixed the sketches accordingly. Brennan had to admit that the artist was very talented; her sketches were every bit as detailed as Angela's had been. Now if only she would listen to the anthropologist the first time around when it came to sexing the individual…

She looked up at the sound of knocking on her door. Greg stood in her doorway, with his arms crossed over his chest.

"May I help you?" Brennan asked, placing the sketch she had been observing back down on her desk.

"You're kicking me off of your services," he said bluntly.

"I'm not kicking you off of anything. Booth has merely agreed to return to the team."

"You don't have the authority to decide who works your cases."

"Oh I think I do. But to humor you, let's say that I don't. However, Hacker has that authority and he and I go way back. I'd say that it's been a pleasure Agent Thompson, but it really hasn't been. So now, if you'll excuse me –"

"No," Greg said forcefully, stepping into her office. "I like this job; I won't let _you_ reassign me."

Brennan ran a hand through her hair before standing up and stepping around to the front of her desk.

"You like this job? Really? You certainly fooled me. Your work is sloppy. You appear to have no regards for the victim. The only thing you seem to care about is your case closure rate. So excuse me for wanting a partner who actually cares."

Greg took a step towards her and Brennan instinctively grabbed his arm and bent it behind his back. A slur of curse words escaped his lips just as Booth appeared in the doorway.

"Am I interrupting something?" Booth asked, cocking an eyebrow.

"No," Brennan replied, releasing Greg from her grip. "Agent Thompson was just leaving…for good."

He simply stood there rubbing his arm and staring at Brennan in disbelief.

"Seriously man, I would leave if I were you. She has more martial arts training than you'd believe," Booth told him.

Greg mumbled something incoherent and then quickly exited her office.

"He try to make a pass at you or something?" Booth smirked.

"He was being rude and I felt threatened by his presence. I also had an overwhelming urge to kick him in the testicles."

Booth snorted. "And did you?"

"No, you showed up before I had the chance."

"Such a shame," Booth laughed shaking his head. "You know, I've missed this side of you."

"What side of me?" Brennan asked, moving back to sit in her desk chair.

"The badass Brennan who doesn't need anyone to protect her."

"Oh, she's been here. She just hasn't had any reason to be 'badass' in a while."

"It's kind of hot."

"You find a lot of things to be kind of hot," Brennan stated, picking up Annah's sketches again. "Did you need something or…?"

"No, not really. Just dropping by because I can."

"Admit it, you missed me."

"What?" Booth laughed.

"We've been apart for a whole two hours now, and you just couldn't stand it."

"Oh, I don't think so. I missed the lab, maybe, but not you."

Brennan narrowed her eyes at him, a smile creeping across her face. Booth returned her mischievous smile, picking a sketch up from her desk. "Oh I see your artist finally agreed to make the victim female. Wow, she's not half bad either. Almost as good as Angela."

"Almost," Brennan mumbled, staring back down at the other two sketches.

"What exactly are you accomplishing by staring at these?"

"Nothing," she sighed, taking the third sketch away from him.

"Well, the body's that way," Booth said sarcastically, pointing at the platform.

"And I've told you, I already determined cause of death and all of that. Now we just need to identify her so we can catch her murderer."

"Has your entomologist gotten his shit together yet?"

"I don't know what that expression means, but I'm going to say no…"

"Hmm right, I think I'll go yell at Cam now."

"And what exactly is that going to accomplish?"

"Not sure, but it sounds like fun."

Brennan shook her head as Booth moved to leave her office. "Welcome back, Agent Booth."

"It's good to be back, Dr. Brennan."

* * *

"Word on the street has it that you're trying to run this place into the ground," Booth said upon entering Cam's office.

"Seeley!" Cam exclaimed. "First of all, welcome back. Second of all, stop talking to Dr. Brennan."

"Kind of hard not to talk to the woman I live with. And since we're partners again, communication is sort of key. But uh, they're no Angela and Hodgins, huh?"

Cam groaned. "I'm beginning to feel like there are very few people qualified for this job."

"So why'd you hire them?"

"They looked good on paper. And we're still in need of a botanist. You wouldn't by any chance happen to know one, would you?"

"Can't say that I do. Listen, Camille, Bones is really getting stressed over this case. I don't know if it's because she's really missing her old team and friends or if she's just frustrated because her new team can't seem to do anything right."

"Yes, Seeley I know. I've talked to her. I just don't know what she expects me to do about it. We needed to solve this case like yesterday and Ms. Cooper and Dr. Wessland were our most qualified applicants. Angela and Hodgins have just set the standard too high. I'm hoping that having you back will calm her down a bit."

"Well considering I walked in on her trying to beat up Greg, I'd hope so."

"She was doing what now?"

"Don't worry about it."

Cam ran a hand over her face, standing up from her desk.

"How are you two doing by the way?" she asked.

"We're fine. Things are pretty much normal between us now."

"So I'm assuming you haven't told her about Hannah yet."

"Camille, we've been through this. She doesn't need to know about that. Her not knowing doesn't affect our relationship at all."

"I still think you should tell her. You owe her that much."

"I owe it to her _not_ to tell her. You don't know her like I do…this…she can't handle it. Now please stop trying to guilt me into telling her."

"I sure hope you know what you're doing, Seeley. I'd really hate for this to come back around and bite you in the ass."

"There's no way that it could," Booth said fumbling with a rubber band he'd picked up off of her desk. "Hey are you still planning on having a staff Christmas party next month?"

"I hadn't really given it much thought, why?"

"Well I was just thinking that Bones probably wouldn't be all that comfortable with these new recruits there. So maybe just us, Sweets, and the squinterns? Hell, Caroline could come if she really wanted to. But this ah Dr. what's his name and new artist chick…I feel like the Jeffersonian's annual New Year's Eve party should be enough 'staff bonding' to tide them over, don't you think?"

"I suppose…" Cam trailed off knitting her eyebrows together in confusion.

"Look, I don't know if anyone ever told you this, but her parents left around Christmas time. It's really a sensitive time of year for her. And I just think that with Angela and Hodgins gone, she needs to spend it with her other friends she considers family and not two random staff members she clearly hates."

"Fine, I won't invite them. But it's only November 10th, Seeley. Why the sudden urge to bring this up now?"

"I just ordered her Christmas present before I came over here, so it was on my mind."

Cam smiled, understanding flooding her face. "You know, I'm really glad that you two were able to work things out; even though it was under such terrible circumstances. Everything just felt so wrong with you two fighting. I mean you're Booth and Brennan; two halves of one whole."

"Yeah that's what Angela used to say... It does feel good to have her back. You're a great listener and all, but Bones? She knows my secrets; just like I know hers."

It was weird to think that mere months ago he and Brennan hadn't been on speaking terms. That mere months ago, all they had to do was look at each other and a fight would break out. And that now, things were basically the same way they had always been between them. Booth just wasn't sure what scared him more: the fact that his feelings for Brennan had easily been absent for a good year or the fact that his feelings for her had come crashing back at such a full force.

* * *

AN: Decided to ditch my set update schedule and just update whenever I feel like it. So it'll be more constant now and not just every Friday/Saturday. Get excited! Like what you've been reading? Let me know! I LOVE reading your reviews. :)


	7. Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas

_Here we are as in olden days, happy golden days of yore._

_Faithful friends who are dear to us, they gather near to us once more._

_Through the years we all will be together and if the fates allow._

_Hang a shining star upon the highest bough._

_And have yourself a merry little Christmas now. _

* * *

The holiday season really was his favorite time of the year. Booth just simply loved everything about it: the music, the decorations, the smells, the sense of family, the religious aspect, the presents... It was always the highlight of the dark and dreary, bitter winter that lie ahead of them. It made him happy when the cold, harsh weather was trying to bring him down.

And right now, at this moment, things couldn't have been more perfect. Booth sat on the couch in front of the fireplace with Katie asleep on his lap, watching as the first snow of the season gently fell outside. The glow of Christmas lights from the tree twinkled around them. Frank Sinatra belted out the sounds of the season in the background as the smell of Brennan's Christmas cookies wafted in from the kitchen. He couldn't remember the last time he had ever felt so at peace. All he needed was for Parker to be there and things would be absolutely perfect.

He heard the soft patter of Brennan's footsteps behind him and turned his head to notice she was carrying a plate of her cookies. Wordlessly, she put them on the table in front him before sitting besides him on the couch and pulling the blanket that was draped over the back into her lap. Booth watched her as she reached for a cookie and then settled back into her place. He certainly couldn't deny the fact that even with her hair in a messy ponytail and no makeup on, she was still the most beautiful woman he'd ever seen.

"What?" Brennan asked when she caught him staring at her. "Do I have flour on my face?" She wiped at her face with the back of her hand.

"No, just, nothing," Booth stumbled over his words.

"Okay…" Brennan raised her eyebrows at him.

"These look delicious!" Booth exclaimed, changing the subject and reaching for a cookie. Katie shifted on his lap when he did so, but she still appeared to be asleep.

"I hope they are; I haven't made them in years. My dad found my mom's old recipe book and gave it to me last year. We used to make these every Christmas Eve together. And Russ always wanted to help, but my mom always told him no. She would say that cookie making was _our _special thing."

"Well before you know it, you'll have your own special little helper," Booth said, nodding towards Katie.

"Hmm, I suppose that's true. Before you know it, we'll be raising a teenager."

"Oh God, don't say that. Parker's older than she is. I don't want either of them to grow up."

"Well whether you want it to happen or not, it will. It's a normal process of life."

"Ha, yeah I got that, Bones, thanks," Booth laughed, biting into his cookie. "Hey these are pretty good!"

"You sound surprised."

"Me? Surprised? Not at all! So, Bones, Santa Claus. He's coming on Christmas Eve, right?"

"You're going to lie to her too about this?"

"Come on, Bones. It's just what you tell kids. You had a childhood; didn't you ever believe in Santa Claus?"

"Russ tried to get me to believe, but I've always been a highly rational person."

"Even when you were three?"

Brennan shrugged, "And besides, we didn't even have a chimney."

Booth laughed and the noise was enough to wake Katie. She yawned, stretching her arms above her head.

"Well look who decided to wake up in time for dinner," he commented, still laughing. "Maybe if you're nice to her, Bones will give you a cookie."

Brennan smiled, shaking her head and turning to look out the window. "I'm beginning to understand why you enjoy this time of year so much."

"Yeah, it's pretty great, isn't it?"

"I've spent years hating this month…but ever since I met you…"

"I have that effect on people."

Brennan chuckled to herself as she moved to take Katie from Booth. "Come on sweetie, let's get you fed."

Booth noticed her pause before she left for the kitchen; no doubt thinking about how everyone had been "sweetie" to Angela. He settled back into the couch cushions after selecting another cookie to munch on. He closed his eyes and let the sound of Frank's voice wash over him as he slowly drifted off. _Through the years we all will be together and if the fates allow. Hang a shining star upon the highest bough. And have yourself a merry little Christmas now. _

* * *

Her work family. That's who these people were. There were only two people missing, but she was trying not to focus on their absence. They were here to celebrate the season after all. Brennan approached the group sitting in the elevated lounge type area of the lab and noticed Caroline had shown up, but two others were missing.

"Where's Annah and Dr. Wessland?" she asked, directing her question at Booth.

Cam had told her that Booth had asked her not to invite them. She was both thankful and relieved that he had done so; not wanting to spend this time with her new colleagues she just couldn't make herself like. But of course, she couldn't let Booth know that she knew.

"Oh, uh, they were busy," Booth said quickly. "Right Cam?"

Cam nodded, plastering a very fake smile on her face.

"Right," Brennan laughed, taking the empty spot on the couch between Booth and Caroline.

Booth handed her a cup of eggnog as she surveyed the group of people around her. Sweets and Daisy giggled about something to her right. Well okay, _Daisy_ giggled as Sweets continued whispering something in her ear. On her left Caroline and Cam were discussing their current case and how this one would solve itself a lot quicker than their previous child case had. She listened as Vincent, Fisher, Arastoo, and Clark argued about Clark asking his girlfriend to move in with him for her Christmas present. They were all convinced it was a terrible idea, except for Clark. Brennan turned to ask Booth how long they had before they needed to relieve the babysitter, only to notice that he and Wendell were deep in a discussion about the last Flyer's game. She would never understand hockey.

And that's when Angela's absence really hit her. If Hodgins were here, he'd probably be adding to the male squints discussion of Clark's love life. But if Angela were here, they'd probably be discussing Katie's recent ability to walk or about how she and Booth were practically their old selves again or even about that one Christmas party involving too much eggnog and a photocopy machine. Brennan laughed to herself at the memory. Then she began thinking about the Christmas that followed and how a mistake by Zach and Hodgins had forced them all into quarantine at the lab. And how the drugs they had been given to prevent the disease had put Booth into a state that was a combination of drunk and high. Her laughing finally bubbled out of her mouth.

"What's so funny?" Booth asked, noticing she hadn't been talking to anyone.

Her laughter grew even louder as she recalled telling Caroline that kissing Booth was like kissing her brother. Kissing Booth was so far from kissing Russ, it was on a different spectrum.

"Seriously, Bones, what is it?"

Brennan wiped at her eyes, thinking now about her cousin Margaret, whom Booth claimed looked like her sister, and wondered what she was up to now. She certainly hoped the Benjamin Franklin quotes had stopped.

"It's nothing, Booth," she said quietly, really wishing her best friend was here to talk to so she didn't look like the maniac laughing to herself in the corner.

"Well, clearly something was funny."

She noticed that everyone had stopped their conversations and were all staring at her now.

"I was…I was just thinking about the past Christmases I've had with you people. Like the year that Hodgins and Zach accidentally contaminated all of us with that old disease and we were stuck here until Christmas day. But I guess only Booth was there for that now…"

Booth instinctively moved his hand to her back in a comforting gesture.

"And then uh," Brennan continued, "how Caroline made Booth and I kiss under mistletoe so my dad and Russ could have a conjugal trailer for the family on Christmas."

"You did what now?" Cam asked, eyeing Caroline next to her.

Caroline simply shrugged, "I was feeling puckish."

"And then there was this one year when Angela had too much spiked eggnog at the Jeffersonian's Christmas party and started photocopying her butt upstairs and…" Brennan trailed off in a mix of laughter and sobs, realizing that even Booth wasn't there for that. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I promised myself I wouldn't make today about them and here I am…"

"We all miss them, Bones. It's okay," Booth said, reassuringly.

Brennan threw him a half-smile, knowing he was just trying to make her feel better.

"Hey, why don't we start the gift exchange?" Sweets suggested. "That should lighten the mood a little bit."

Everyone began to pass around gifts and the various conversations started back up. Brennan felt herself drift back to her own thoughts; once again feeling alone. Her mind flashed back to a time when she thought she was fine alone and she realized that statement was far from true.

"Hey Bones," Booth nudged her. "Who do you think drew your name?"

Brennan simply shrugged in response.

"Well then, who'd you get?"

"Daisy," she answered flatly, making no effort to continue the conversation.

"Hey." Booth drew her gaze up to his by gently directing her chin. "Talk to me."

"You and Wendell may continue your hockey discussion. I don't mind."

"I'd rather talk to you."

"You live with me, Booth. Use this time to talk to your friends."

"They're your friends too. Hell, they're like your second family."

"I know," Brennan said, drawing her gaze away from his again. "But that doesn't stop me from feeling so alone."

"You're not alone, Dr. Brennan," Sweets chimed in overhearing this part of the conversation. "You have all of us."

"Sweets is right," Cam added. "We may not have been as close as you were with Angela, or even Hodgins, but we're here for you. I know it's been tough trying to get back into the swing of things without them, but if you ever need to talk…"

"I know, thank you," Brennan answered quietly.

"Here, maybe this will help," Wendell said, handing her a gift-wrapped box. "I drew your name."

She smiled at him, taking the box and removing the lid. What she found inside nearly took her breath away.

"Wendell –"

"I'm the only one who knows who to work the Angelator now, ever since that crash course I had while Katie was being born," he started explaining. "And I was using it a few weeks ago to try and figure out what was on that CD we found with the victim. And well, it's a complicated system and I accidently ended up in Angela's personal files. I saw that one of them read 'Bren Xmas' and the date on the file was from this year and I still needed to get you a present for this, so I opened it. And I just figured she'd still want you to have it, so… it's from the both of us."

Brennan picked the gift up out of the box to further examine it. It certainly was uniquely Angela. The artist had compiled all of Brennan's favorite photos from over the years, including the ones involving Booth; probably hoping that by December things would be okay between them again. Wendell had taken the photos and placed them in a photo album, but the thing that had taken her breath away was the note in Angela's handwriting attached to the front.

"Where did you find this note?" she asked softly.

"I found it in one of her drawers while I was looking for a pen. I figured you might want it."

_Bren, I'm still debating if I actually want to give this to you or not so if I decide against it and you happen to stumble across this someday, don't be mad. I just…this whole thing with Booth. It's been almost a year now. And before you say it, I know I should be yelling at him instead of you, but believe me, I've tried. He's a very stubborn man as you well know. I just keep thinking back to when you guys first started working together. You two were so adorable, always flirting with each other. Yeah he was with Tessa, whatever. I mean think about what you two have been through together. You're the only one who can fix this, Bren and you really, really need to fix this. You guys are both miserable. And you know why? Because you still love each other. Don't try to tell me, that you don't love him. Just because you've never said it aloud, doesn't mean you don't feel it. And as your best friend, I think I've earned the right to call you out on your shit. Because sweetie, when you have a man like Booth who loves you as much as he does, you don't just let him get away. _

Brennan folded the note in half and ran her hands over her face.

"Wendell, did you read this note?" she asked him.

"Yes. And I have to say that I agree with it."

"That's really none of your business, don't you think?"

"What does the note say, Bones?" Booth asked her.

"Ah…nothing. Thank you, Wendell. The pictures are really nice. Excuse me," Brennan said in a rush, standing up and leaving the group.

"Bones, where are you going?" Booth called after her.

"I uh, I left Daisy's present in my office."

"No, you didn't. It's right here."

"Leave her be, Booth," Cam instructed.

He watched as Brennan ran to her office and practically slammed the door behind her. She seemed really upset.

"Wendell, what the hell did that note from Angela say?" Booth demanded.

"It's really not my place to share."

"Why do you get to know and I don't?"

"Seeley –" Cam warned.

"No, I'm serious," Booth started. "She is _really _upset. Angela's handwriting would not draw that much of a response from her alone. It had to have been the content. So, what was the content?"

"Booth, I really can't. If you want to know, you're going to have to get it from her," Wendell told him.

A few more awkward minutes passed before Brennan finally emerged from her office and returned to the group. She took her place besides Booth again but now felt slightly uncomfortable by his side.

"Everything okay?" he asked.

"Yes, yes I'm fine. Don't worry," she assured him.

"You sure?" he noticed her squirming beside him as though she was trying to distance herself from him.

"Really. I'm fine."

He didn't buy it, but he let it go…for now. He planned to interrogate her again when they were back in the comfort of their own home…or rather Angela and Hodgins' home. He still wasn't sure what to call it.

"Lance, I just can't hold it any longer," Daisy whispered loudly.

"All right, all right, we'll tell them," Sweets agreed.

"Tell us what?" Cam wanted to know.

Sweets took Daisy's hand in his and together they stood up.

"We're engaged!" Daisy blurted.

"Again," Sweets added. "And we've really talked about it this time, and we're serious. We're actually getting married."

The rest of the team burst into cheers and hugs and congratulations, except for Booth and Brennan who remained seated. Brennan was too busy thinking about how their previous engagement had been broken off. And how later Sweets had talked Booth into proposing to the product of their year apart. And how the fight that had resulted from the turned down proposal had caused them so much pain. She didn't doubt that Booth was thinking about the exact same things while he sat speechless, unmoving next to her.

"You thinking what I'm thinking?" Booth asked softly.

"Yes. I shouldn't have gone to Maluku," Brennan whispered.

"I shouldn't have gone to Afghanistan," he whispered back.

They turned to each other, sharing their signature "look."

"What were we thinking in doing that?" she asked.

"That we needed a break from all of this. And that we could just come back without anything changing."

"So much for that, huh?"

"Well, we're almost back to normal now. And you know, Sweets and Daisy being engaged doesn't have a direct correlation to our relationship."

"You're starting to sound like me," Brennan laughed. "But you're right. I shouldn't allow myself to think that everything is going to become messed up again just because it did the last time they were engaged. In fact, the thought of such sounds utterly ridiculous."

"I've said it once, and I'll say it again, Bones. We're going to make it through this."

"What are guys not happy for us or something?" Sweets asked, walking over to them. "I mean everyone else is over here cheering and stuff and you two are just sitting here."

"Oh yeah. Congrats man!" Booth laughed.

"What?" Sweets asked concerned. "Why are you laughing?"

"Calm down, Sweets, this has nothing to do with you," Brennan reassured. "But congratulations, really. You too, Daisy."

Sweets didn't seem convinced, but he backed off anyway. The party fell back into its rhythm of mixed conversations and gift opening. Brennan had found Daisy one of the Prince Charmington dolls she loved so much and Booth had given Cam a copy of _The Shining_, a long time inside joke between them. Caroline had drawn Booth's name and gave him what she claimed to be the craziest tie she could proceeded to take a group picture at the end of the evening before bidding goodbyes and parting their ways.

Booth slid behind the wheel of his SUV, waiting for Brennan to get into the passenger side. He was intent on discovering the contents of that letter from Angela.

"It was overall a pretty good night, right?" Booth asked, once they were alone in his car.

"Yes, it was."

"A nice way to spend Christmas Eve."

"Mmm-hmm," Brennan agreed keeping her gaze focused on the snowy world beyond her window.

"So, uh, what did Angela have to say?" Booth tried to casually slip it into the conversation.

"It's not important."

"You seemed pretty upset by it."

"Don't worry about it."

"Bones –"

"Just let it go, Booth, please."

And so he did. But that didn't stop him from secretly plotting to find a way to read whatever was in that letter. Whatever Angela had written were forever going to be her final words of advice, wisdom, whatever to Brennan and whatever those words were, they had deeply affected his partner. No, Booth just wasn't going to be able to let this one go.

* * *

It was the first real family Christmas either of them had had in years. And yet here it was happening with more family present in one room than either thought was possible. Pops, Jared, Padme, Parker, Max, Russ, Amy, Emma, Haley, and even cousin Margaret had all shown up. More surprisingly, Rebecca and Brent were there too. Booth figured that everyone had finally decided that this would be a good year to show some familial support, what with all of the tragedies and changes.

Having all of them here was making him a tad bit overwhelmed. His family was one thing, but Brennan's? It almost felt like they were married and he wasn't entirely sure how he felt about that at this point. Booth was currently standing in the kitchen watching them all mingle in the living room.

Brennan walked in carrying Katie. "How's it going out there?"

"Well, it's going."

"I still can't believe that all of them are here. You actually have family. _I_ actually have family. And there are a lot of them."

"Shocking isn't it?"

"I just…why now?"

"My guess is, we lost two people who were extremely close to us and we are now raising their child together. They're either here for moral support or to watch us fail."

"Well now that we've established why Jared's here…"

"You're terrible," Booth laughed. "But oh so right."

"Should we go out there?"

"Probably."

"All right, let's do this," Brennan said, taking the lead and walking into the room full of people.

"Tempe!" Max exclaimed upon seeing his daughter enter the room. "And Miss Katie! Can I hold my granddaughter?"

"Dad, she isn't..." Brennan started looking down at Katie. "Never mind, I guess she is. Yes, you can hold her."

She handed her over to him.

"So that means she's our baby cousin, right?" Haley asked from her spot between Russ and Amy.

"Yes, it does," Brennan answered, smiling.

"Is Katie like my half sister then? No, wait step-sister?" Parker wanted to know.

"No, buddy, she's just your sister," Booth answered entering the room. "Or actually, maybe she would be your half sister…"

"How about we just refer to Katie as his sister?" Rebecca suggested. "Avoid the hassle of confusing titles."

"Good call," Parker agreed.

"This is nice," Pops commented. "All of us here together. Like one giant family."

"Pops –"

"Oh relax, Seeley. I was just making commentary."

"The man does have a point," Max added. "I've missed gatherings like this. Haven't had both sides of the family together since your name was Joy." He nodded at Brennan.

"When did you change your name to Temperance?" Padme asked.

"Oh I don't know. What do you say Dad, I was two?"

"Are you in the witness protection program?" Brent asked stunned.

"Hmmm, something like that," Brennan responded with a small laugh.

"Brent, you can't just go around asking people that," Rebecca chastised, slapping him on the arm.

"You know, Max," Booth started, walking over to stand next to Brennan. "When you say

'both sides of the family,' you make it sound like your daughter and I are married."

"Well, maybe you should be," Max said simply.

"Dad –" Brennan warned.

"What? It's not like I'm saying go get married tomorrow, but you really still can't be in denial about how perfect you two are for each other."

"Never leave that till tomorrow, which you can do today," Margaret chimed in.

"Okay, Benjamin Franklin, you're not helping," Booth told her.

"Seriously. And Margaret, I thought you stopped quoting him all of the time," Brennan said.

"I have. I just felt like that quote was relevant."

"No, but seriously you two," Max tried again. "Are you sleeping together yet? You do live together now and –"

"Dad!"

"No, no I agree with him," Jared spoke up. "I mean, come on bro, it's been what, like 8 years now? I think it's high time that you take her up against the wall and –"

"Jared! There are children in this room!" Booth yelled at him.

"I can't believe this is happening," Brennan murmured, burying her bright red face in her hands.

"All right, all right," Russ started in an attempt to calm everyone down. "When's dinner going to be ready, Tempe?"

"As soon as the timer goes off, which should really be any minute now."

As if on cue, the buzzer sounded.

"Okay people, dining room!" Booth announced. "Right this way."

As everyone wandered into the dining room, Booth followed Brennan into the kitchen.

"Family, huh?" he asked with a smirk once they were alone.

Brennan pulled the ham out of the oven and placed it on the counter with a sigh. "Do they think they're actually being helpful, or are they just trying to be humorous?"

"They're just doing what family does, Bones."

"I can't even tell who was worse: my father or your brother."

Brennan walked back over to the stove and removed the green beans that had been heating and poured them into a bowl.

"I'd have to go with my brother on that one," Booth said, moving to get the butter out of the fridge. "He basically announced in front of everyone that I just need to fuck you and get it over with already."

She stopped her food preparation and allowed her eyes to lock onto his. "Fuck me?"

"His words, not mine," Booth said quickly, his eyes widening, realizing his mistake.

"No, his words were 'take me up against a wall,'" Brennan corrected. "And I'm also pretty certain that he didn't use the phrase 'get it over with already.'"

"It's what he was _implying_, Bones. Look, you know me. I'm not the kind of guy who does stuff like that."

"Right, right because you believe in this making love nonsense."

Booth sighed. "And I see you still don't."

Instead of responding, Brennan moved over to the cutting board on the counter and began slicing up the loaf of French bread. Booth followed her, coming up behind her and standing uncomfortably close.

He leaned in and whispered into her ear. "Don't you ever fantasize about it? Giving up all of your control to another person and just letting them take you over the edge as you break the laws of physics. Being so incredibly into each other that the only thing you want is to press yourself into each other as far as you can go. Getting that orgasm that is so intense and so full of pleasure that you swear you see God. Or are you the kind of girl who prefers to be fucked up against the kitchen wall?"

She drew in a sharp breath as she brought the bread cutter down with a thud, just missing her finger.

"Just think about that, Bones. _Think about it_."

He turned to leave the kitchen only to look back at the last second and stare at her. Her hands were gripping the counter so tight that her knuckles were white. Her eyes had turned glassy and he watched as they fluttered closed. She bit her lower lip and made this little moaning noise that made him want to take Jared's advice and take her up against the wall right then and there. _Mission accomplished_, he smiled to himself as he entered the dining room.

"Well don't tell me you came in here empty handed!" Pops exclaimed. "I thought I raised you better than that."

"Relax, Pops. I came to take drink orders."

"Oh well in that case, I'll have a cabernet."

Brennan walked in seconds later, brandishing the glazed ham.

"Oh that looks great, Temperance!" Amy commented. "Is there anything I can help you with?"

"I've got it covered, Amy. Thank you for offering though."

She went back into the kitchen to bring out more food and Booth followed again to the pour the drinks. Brennan came up behind him as he was unscrewing the cork from the wine bottle, standing behind him like he had done to her.

"For you information," she began whispering, "I'm up for anything when it comes to sex."

The cork went flying across the room; a reaction to Booth's surprise at her statement. Brennan smiled picking up the bowl of green beans in one hand and the bread basket in the other.

"Think about that one, Booth. _Think about it_."

* * *

The rest of dinner went off without a hitch. Conversation was light and no one brought up their desire for Booth and Brennan to be a couple.

"You know I think it's about time for presents," Max suggested, patting his stomach.

"I agree!" Emma chimed in.

"All right gang, everybody head back into the living room," Booth told them.

Brennan started clearing off the table, mindlessly watching everyone, caught in her own thoughts. She hadn't been able to get Angela's note out of her head since yesterday, and this new sexual teasing she and Booth had started was making it even worse. The thought of being in love with him absolutely terrified her. This was why she had turned him down that night outside of Sweet's office. She didn't know how to be in a relationship like that. She didn't know what it was like to _need_ someone, and yet somehow she knew that she needed Booth. And she hated that she did. She wanted him, but at the same time she didn't. It was such an internal conflict and Brennan felt that the only person who could help her figure what she really wanted was dead.

"You okay, Bones?" she heard Booth ask her. She realized she had been standing by the table, holding the empty bread basket and staring off into space, for several minutes now.

"I – yes. I'll be right there," she told him.

She finished clearing off the table and then joined everyone in the living room. Katie, who had been sitting by Booth's feet on the floor, walked over to her when she noticed her enter the room. Brennan smiled and happily picked her up and placed her on her lap. Katie snuggled into Brennan's chest, letting out a happy sigh.

"I love you too, Katie," Brennan whispered, kissing her on the top of her head.

She watched as Parker went around delivering everyone's presents.

"Merry Christmas, Bones!" Parker smiled, handing her a stack of presents.

"Thank you, Parker. Merry Christmas to you, too."

"Hey, do you remember that one Christmas when my dad and me brought your family a Christmas tree and we turned it on using dad's car?"

"I do."

"He's a pretty nice guy, isn't he?"

"Yes, he is. I can see that you get that from him."

"Really? Thanks Bones!" he smiled again and then left to go finish dividing up the presents.

"Open mine last," Booth leaned over and told her.

"Which one is yours?"

"The one on top. Trust me; you'll want to save it till the very end."

"Well in that case, you should probably open mine last as well."

"Okay, which one is yours?"

"This one," Brennan said, pointing to a present in the middle of his stack.

"All right. Oh and Bones? Thank you."

"For what?"

"For this," Booth said gesturing to their families. Haley and Emma were enthralled in some story that Padme was telling them. Amy and Rebecca were discussing which high schools they wanted to send their kids too. Jared, Russ, and Brent were all discussing something regarding the NFL. Max and Margaret were talking about whatever family it was that made them related in the first place. And Parker was listening to Pops tell stories about the Christmases he had when he was a boy. "You did this. I thought they all came because they were trying to be supportive after everything that's happened, but I was talking to Jared, and he told me that you called him. You called everyone."

"I thought that we could use a real family Christmas after everything. I don't know if you've noticed, but I've been pretty depressed lately."

"Oh, I've noticed," he said, rubbing her on the back. "But this is really great. I think it's exactly what all three of us needed."

"Oh, I tried to get a hold of Angela's father, but he was busy."

"You still did good, Bones. Really, really good."

"Thanks Booth."

For the next hour or so everyone went around taking turns opening their gifts. There was so much laughter and spirit in the room the Brennan almost forgot why she used to hate this holiday so much. Eventually the only two presents left in the room were the ones Booth and Brennan had given each other.

"I'll go first," Booth offered, toying with the ribbon around his gift.

"You really want this to be the last thing opened, don't you?" Brennan asked, gesturing to the gift in her lap.

"Yeah, I do," he smiled, slipping the ribbon off of the box. He tore off the wrapping paper and revealed a shoe box. "Did you get me shoes? Is this because you wanted to call me 'Shoes' back when I first started calling you 'Bones'?"

"Just open the box, Shoes," Brennan said with a smile.

Booth smiled back at her comment and lifted the lid on the box. "Flyers tickets? Damn, these are good seats too! And this game was sold out. Bones, how did you –"

"I know a guy. Well okay, my publisher knows a guy."

"Wow. Well thanks, Bones! This one is going to be the game of the year!"

"So I've heard," she smiled again. "There's more."

"More than this?"

"Look back in the box."

Booth removed the layer of tissue paper that was still in the box. He found himself staring a hockey puck autographed by his favorite player.

"No way! Is this the guy your publisher knows?" Booth joked.

"Actually it is. They went to high school together…or something."

"Well then, I plan on utilizing these connections more often," he laughed. "Thanks, Bones!"

"You're welcome."

Booth marveled over the hockey puck for a few more minutes before he finally turned back to Brennan. "Okay, okay. Open yours."

Brennan began unwrapping the gift, not really sure what to expect. Her mind drifted to Brainy Smurf and Jasper and she suddenly wondered if he remembered giving her those plastic toys. She made a mental note to go fish them out of that box in the back of her closet in her apartment. They'd been shoved there during a time when simply looking at them had upset her. She and Booth had certainly come a long way in four months.

"Booth," she breathed once she had unwrapped the gift. "Is this…"

He nodded watching as she lifted the gift out of its wrapping. It was music box. Just like the one she had mentioned her mother had years ago. Ever since he heard her reminisce about it a few years back, he'd been waiting for the perfect moment to track one down. Booth figured mending their broken relationship was as good a time as any.

"It looks just like the one Mom had," Brennan commented.

"Here, let me see that," Max said, reaching for it.

She handed it to him, and he turned it over in his hands. He wound it up and opened the lid, listening as its twinkling notes filled the room.

"You know I don't actually know what happened to your mother's. There's a chance that this could be it," Max told her.

"Booth, how did you remember that?" Brennan asked.

"The best thing to give a woman is something she said she wanted when she didn't think you were listening. And I remember the way your face lit up when you were talking about this that night. I knew then that somehow, some way, I needed to find it for you."

"Thank you," Brennan whispered, taking it back from Max and running her fingers over the detailing. "I love it."

"A gift like that, Seeley," Pops started. "You _must _be in love with her."

"Pops," Booth scolded.

Brennan watched as a blush colored his cheeks briefly. Oh God, he _was_ in love with her. Still. After all this time and all of the fighting. After Hannah. Her mind flashed back again to Angela's note. _Because sweetie, when you have a man like Booth who loves you as much as he does, you don't just let him get away. _

Katie, thankfully, started crying, in need of a diaper change. Brennan quickly took her upstairs, excusing herself from the group.

"Well she seems pretty on edge about this whole thing," Jared remarked.

"Jared," Booth started, shaking his head. "Just stop, okay? All of you stop. Brennan and I are not together."

"But you want to be," Margaret said. "It's fairly obvious. And you have yet to deny your love for her."

"She means a lot to me, okay? She always has, but –"

"Still not denying it," Margaret said again.

Booth groaned, tired of fighting them on this. "Bones is my best friend. We tell each other things that we don't share with a whole lot of people. Of course I love her. But you've got to stop trying to push us together. It'll happen when it happens, _if_ it happens. The two of us have just fixed our friendship after over a year of fighting. I don't want to rush into anything and from the looks of it, she doesn't either. So please, just leave well enough alone."

Everybody finally seemed to get it then and by the time Brennan returned with the freshly changed Katie, the topic had been completely dropped. The rest of the evening was splendid and everyone was almost sad to see it end.

"We need to get all of us together again sometime," Max was saying as he put on his coat. "I miss having this sense of family."

"Sure, Dad, we'll do it again," Brennan told him, handing him his scarf.

"Listen, Tempe, I'm sorry if we made you uncomfortable earlier. We were just –"

"I know what you were doing. Thank you for finally stopping."

"I just want you to be happy. It's what fathers do."

"I know, Dad. I know," Brennan told him, pulling him into a hug. "Have a good night."

"Same to you," he said with a smile. "Goodbye! Oh and Merry Christmas!"

He was the last one to leave, reducing the number of people in the house back down to three. Brennan moved back into the living room, groaning at the mess of boxes and wrapping paper the room had become. She flopped back down on the couch with a sigh. Booth came back downstairs from putting Katie to bed. He sat down next to Brennan, handing her a glass of wine.

"Might as well finish the bottle off," he told her.

Brennan nodded, taking a sip.

"I again apologize for my family," Booth said before taking a sip of his own.

"Mine was just as guilty as yours," she concluded.

Brennan put her wine glass down on the table and picked up her music box. She wound it up and let it play, closing her eyes as she recalled the memory.

"I remember being little, really little," she started. "And I would sit on their bed and my mother would play this for me. Au clair de la lune; by the light of the moon. I would ask her every night if I could keep it. And she always said 'when you're older, Tempe, when you're older.' Even if this isn't the exact one that belonged to her, I'd like to think that it is."

"I thought you didn't remember your childhood?" Booth asked.

"Oh I remember everything. Or as much as the average human remembers about their childhood. Those memories were the only things that got me through foster care."

Brennan placed the music box back on the table in exchange for her wine glass. She ran her index finger around the rim and it hummed with vibration.

"Something else on your mind, Bones?"

"Yes."

"Care to share?"

"Not really."

"Now, how is that fair?"

"I never said that it was."

"You'd tell me though, if it was something important, right?"

Brennan looked over at him and opened her mouth to respond, but decided against it and downed the rest of her wine instead. "I'm going to go take a shower and go to bed. Merry Christmas, Booth."

She started to walk away, but Booth stopped her by grabbing her wrist. "You've been acting all detached ever since you got that note from Angela. It said something that affected you. I want to know what that is."

"I'm fine, Booth. Now let me go."

"No. Not until you talk to me."

"I said, let me go."

"Bones –"

"Damnit Booth!" Brennan yelled, resorting to one of her martial arts tricks to free her wrist from his grasp.

"That was totally uncalled for!" Booth yelled back, cradling his aching arm to his chest.

"You asked for it," she mumbled, heading up the stairs.

"You know, I really don't understand you. We were having that really good sex conversation earlier and now you're pissed at me again."

"I'm not mad at you," Brennan told him, pausing at the bottom of the stairs. "I'm mad at myself."

"For what?" he asked, coming up behind her.

"I'll get over it, don't worry."

Booth put his hands on her hips, guiding her to turn around and face him. She sighed, complying. He laced his fingers together behind the small of her back, keeping her in place so she would talk to him. He just hoped that she wouldn't attack him again.

"I really don't want to talk to you about what's going on," she said softly.

"Why? I know I'm not Angela, but –"

"It concerns you. And I can't talk to you about…you."

"So let me get this straight, you're mad at yourself about something that concerns me, but you won't talk about it…because it concerns me. "

"Precisely."

"Fine," Booth said, letting go of her. "I hope you can work whatever this is out."

"I hope so too. Goodnight, Booth."

"Goodnight, Bones. And Merry Christmas."

* * *

AN: Random Tuesday update woo! I may or may not have quoted Castle in there somewhere…This is the longest chapter of anything I've ever written. This page right here that I'm writing on? Page 21. And to think I had originally planned to include New Years in this chapter…ha! Hope the Holiday spirit wasn't too hard to get into during this hot summery month! This is probably one of my favorite chapters so please leave a review and let me know what you think!


	8. What You're Made Of

_Just like I predicted, we're at the point of no return._

_We can't go backwards, and no corners have been turned._

_I can't control it, if I sink or if I swim._

_Cause I chose the waters that I'm in._

* * *

Another year was coming to a close, and oh what a year it had been. So much had happened. He'd lost friends, gained a daughter, and watched as his relationship with Brennan did a complete 180. Booth could hardly believe that it was December 31 already. He was thankful, in a way. A new year meant he and Brennan could really start fresh. It marked the beginning of a new chapter in their lives.

But truthfully, the thing he was most thankful for tonight was the dress Brennan had purchased for the Jeffersonian's Annual New Year's Eve Party. He hadn't seen it on her yet, but he knew she was going to look stunning. As though she had read his mind, she appeared at the top of the stairs. The sight of her nearly took his breath away.

Brennan descended the stairs, putting in her long, glittering chandelier earrings. Her little black dress was backless and Booth wanted nothing more than to run his hands over her soft, alabaster skin. It didn't help that her hair was in an updo, allowing even more of her skin to be exposed.

"Bones, you look…wow," Booth whistled.

"You look pretty sharp, yourself," Brennan returned with a smile.

The doorbell rang and she turned her head to the door, her earrings bouncing against her neck. Oh how he wanted to just bite into that neck…

"Oh, that's for me," he heard Brennan say.

"What, is it the sitter?"

She opened the door and instead of their female teenage sitter, stood a very tall man in a tux.

"Good evening, Phillip," she greeted him.

"Temperance…wow you look great!" he responded.

"Thank you. Please come in."

Who the hell was this guy?

"Bones, can I ah talk to you for a minute…over here?" Booth asked.

"Uh sure," Brennan started looking back over at Phillip. "Excuse me just one minute."

Phillip nodded as Brennan followed Booth into the kitchen.

"What is it?" Brennan asked.

"Who is that guy?"

"Phillip? Oh he's Dr. Griffin, a paleontologist for the Jeffersonian."

"That's great. What's he doing here?"

"He's my date," Brennan said as though it was obvious.

"_Your what_?" Booth gasped, feeling his throat tighten. Surely she hadn't just said what he thought she had.

"My date," Brennan repeated. "Naomi from paleontology set us up. You remember her, don't you? Zack was always talking about her and –"

Oh God.

"Why the hell do you have a date?" Booth demanded.

"It's New Year's Eve. It's customary to –"

"I thought we were going together," he interrupted her.

"Booth…we are not a couple. Just because we live together and we're Katie's parents…that doesn't mean that we're –"

"The hell it doesn't!"

"You're upset."

"Damnit, Bones, of course I'm upset. You have a fucking date!"

"Can we talk about this later? We really need to get to the party."

"I just…what about all of the flirting; the sex talk on Christmas? Does this have something to do with you being mad at yourself over something regarding me?"

"Temperance, are you ready to go?" Phillip called into the kitchen.

"Yes, I'll be right there!" Brennan called back.

"You hate being called Temperance," Booth said softly.

"What else is he supposed to call me? It's my name. Dr. Brennan is too formal, only my family calls me Tempe, the only people who call me Bren or Brennan are our team, and Bones is reserved for you…and Parker. So as much as I hate it, I really don't have a choice."

Booth just stood there staring at her, hurt swirling in his eyes.

"I – I'm sorry. I'll see at the party, won't I?"

"I don't work for the Jeffersonian."

"Booth…You're my partner. You're part of the team. You have to come."

"Maybe you should have thought of that before you decided to accept a date with Phillip from Paleontology."

"But –"

"Just go," Booth told her shaking his head. "I don't want you to keep your date waiting."

Brennan drew her lower lip into her mouth and then turned to leave. She looked back at him when she got to the door. Booth simply waved his hand at her, signaling her to leave. She sighed and then headed out the door after Phillip.

He couldn't believe she was doing this to him. Tonight was supposed to be about the start of _them_; not the start of her and that guy. Now more than ever he needed to know what Angela's last words to Brennan were. She just hadn't been the same since she read that note.

And so Booth headed up to her room to search for it. It's not like she would be back anytime soon to find him snooping. The first place he looked was her underwear drawer, thinking that all women hid secret things in that location. He resisted the urge to run his hands over everything, knowing doing so would only increase his fantasy of undressing her. Instead he just lifted up the neat little piles, searching for the note. Nothing.

His eyes scanned the room, looking for another good hiding place. Her bedside table had a small drawer. It could be in there. Booth moved over to it and sat down on the edge of her bed. He pulled the little drawer open and found several little treasurers inside.

"Well if it isn't Jasper and Brainy Smurf," Booth chuckled to himself, picking the little toys up. "I'd figured she had forgotten all about you guys."

He turned the toys over in his hands, thinking back to the events that had caused him to give them to her. She had killed a man. For him. And so Jasper had been a small token of his appreciation. A small joke gift, to try and cheer her up after she had been forced to take a man's life. And Brainy Smurf had been his way of telling her that high school didn't matter any more; his way of telling her that she was both intelligent and beautiful. Booth couldn't believe she still had them.

Turning back to the drawer, Booth noticed a photo that was laying face down. He picked it up and couldn't help but smile. It was a picture of the two of them from the Jeffersonian's picnic a few years back. She was in the foreground laughing, as he tried to jump on her back. He knew she loved this picture, just like he was certain that she loved him. It made the fact that she was on a date with _Phillip_ right now sting even more.

Right. His mission. Find that damn note. Booth turned back to the drawer again, this time noticing a small folded piece of paper stuffed into the back corner. He pulled it out and carefully unfolded it. _This is it_, he thought, instantly recognizing Angela's handwriting. He read the note slowly, letting its context fully sink in.

_Because you still love each other…Because sweetie, when you have a man like Booth who loves you as much as he does, you don't just let him get away. _

"Oh Angela, what did you do?" Booth asked softly.

Everything made sense now. She was freaking out because the idea of being in love with him terrified her. And things were fine between them as long as she didn't have to admit that she did, in fact, love him. But now…she must have finally admitted it to herself or something. Why else would she be pulling away from him, when she should be falling into his arms?

Booth quickly put her things back in the drawer the way he had found them and headed downstairs. He put on his coat and grabbed his car keys. He was going to make it to that New Year's Eve party after all. And he was going to teach her a lesson.

* * *

"Oh I practically grew up in Paris," Annah was telling everyone. "That is why I have this accent."

"Really? It sounds pretty forced to me," Brennan muttered.

Cam turned to glare at her as Annah's eyes widened in a gesture that practically screamed "you caught me."

"But then again, what do I know? Paris was Angela's city, not mine," Brennan added, as Phillip returned to the group brandishing two glasses of champagne.

Brennan took one from him and downed almost half of it in one long sip.

"Everything okay, Brennan?" Cam asked, knitting her eyebrows together in concern.

"Is everything okay?" she practically laughed. "Far from it."

She finished off the rest of her champagne in another long sip and then handed the empty glass back to Phillip.

"Okay um so, Dr. Wessland," Cam quickly changed the subject by addressing their new entomologist. "How's your son doing?"

"Oh he's doing pretty well, thank you," Dr. Wessland responded. "But we're still having trouble getting him to eat his vegetables. He's awfully picky for a fourteen-month-old."

"You should try the airplane trick," Brennan suggested. "Although it doesn't work when Booth does it, so I can't imagine it working when anyone else does it. The man is perfect after all. But he did say it used to work on Parker, so I stand corrected. He really is perfect…except for when he's being an ass."

"Are you drunk?" Cam whispered into her ear.

"Getting there," Brennan smiled, taking the other glass of champagne from Phillip and downing the rest of it as well. "I need something stronger. Will you go see if they have anything stronger?" she directed her question at her poor, confused date. She heard him mumble something about Naomi before he wandered off to the open bar.

"Can I talk to you for a minute?" Cam asked, dragging her away from the group.

"Well everybody wants to talk to me alone tonight."

"Okay, seriously, what is going on with you? Did you and Booth have a fight?"

"Of course we had a fight! Why else would I be trying so hard to become intoxicated?"

"Did he tell you about Hannah?"

"What about Hannah?"

"Uh, never mind. Forget I said anything."

"No, Cam, come on. What about Hannah?"

"Not really my place. So what were you guys fighting about then?" Cam asked quickly, hoping Brennan would just forget about the Hannah thing.

"Phillip."

"Who's Phillip?"

"My date."

"Oh right! Why did you come with him anyway?"

Brennan just shrugged, not really wanting to get into this with Cam. Meanwhile Phillip returned and handed her a new drink.

"They had whiskey," he said flatly.

"Fantastic," she said, taking it from him.

"You're not drinking that," Cam told her, trying to take it away from her. "You don't even like whiskey."

"You don't know my alcohol preferences," Brennan protested.

"How much have you had to drink already?"

"What are you, my mother? Give me my drink back!"

"How much, Brennan?" she repeated.

"I umm…I don't really know. But I'm not drunk yet, so I need that."

"You sound drunk," Cam stated, holding the glass of whiskey away from her.

"I'm not. I'm just buzzed or whatever you call it. Just give me the whiskey and I'll stop."

"Is she always like this?" Phillip asked.

Brennan threw him a look as Cam answered, "Never. This never happens."

Sweets and Daisy wandered over to them, having just arrived at the party. "Everything okay over here?" he asked, having noticed Cam playing keep away from Brennan.

"Why do people keeping asking me that?" Brennan wanted to know, trying again to take back her drink.

"Umm Booth and Brennan got in a fight because she brought Phillip as her date tonight and now she's trying to get drunk," Cam explained.

"Who's Phillip?" Sweets asked, confused.

"That would be me. And I think I'm going to go find the rest of the paleontology department," he said, turning to walk away.

"No, you can't just leave me!" Brennan called after him. "All right, well find me at midnight!"

"Dr. Brennan, this is very unlike you," Sweets noted.

"You don't know me. Don't pretend like you know me."

"But I do know you. I've known you for six years, and for half of that I was your psychologist."

"No, no, no, that's not what I meant."

"Then what did you mean?"

"This isn't one of our little sessions. I don't have to explain myself to you."

"Daisy, take this drink and…do something with it," Cam told her.

Brennan crossed her arms over her chest in a pout as she watched Daisy take her whiskey back to the bar.

"Dr. Brennan, I'm worried about you," Sweets started. "You've been through a lot lately and –"

"I know what I've been through, thank you. Look, I'm glad that neither of you want me to harm myself by becoming overly intoxicated, but I know how to handle myself. And yes, I am a tad bit drunk right now, but I deserve to be. I've barely let myself drink since any of this happened and I just need a night to do so."

"Now you're talking like an addict," Sweets pointed out.

"Oh for God's sake," Brennan mumbled, scrubbing a hand over her face.

Daisy returned to the group, still carrying the glass of whiskey. "The bar said they wouldn't take it back."

"Here, just give it to me," Brennan told her.

Daisy looked to Cam, uncertain. With a groan, Brennan snatched the glass out of Daisy's grasp and walked away from the three of them.

"I'm done being lectured," she called over her shoulder.

Daisy turned back to Cam, that apologetic smile of hers plastered on her face.

"It's all right Daisy," Cam reassured her. "She clearly isn't going to listen to us."

"I know all of this is really hard on her and stuff, but I really do miss the old Dr. Brennan. I mean I know that tragedy can change people, but this is just too much," Daisy said.

"She'll get better," Sweets said, rubbing her back. "She just needs more time."

"It's been four months. How much time does she need?"

"Apparently a bit longer."

Cam glanced in the direction that Brennan had wandered off to. She was sitting in the corner, nursing her drink. Phillip had rejoined her for some reason. Perhaps he found her more interesting than his paleontology fellows after all. Or maybe he was just looking to take advantage of her. Cam didn't know him well enough to say. However, she figured that even a drunk Brennan had enough common sense not to let the latter happen. The woman had principles after all. Not to mention the fact that she was not-so-secretly in love with Booth. Ah yes, this was going to be a long night.

* * *

By the time Booth arrived at the party it was nearly 11:30. He was a good three and a half hours late. It wasn't _entirely _his fault. His SUV just refused to start in this miserably cold weather. As he entered the ballroom, he was a bit taken aback by how stunning everyone looked. They certainly didn't look like squints anymore; more like billionaires at a high class New York gala. He scanned the room for Brennan and found her slow dancing with Phillip. His hand was caressing her bare back, and it made Booth's blood boil. He had planned to take a civil approach to this whole thing, but seeing him touch her like that threw all of his old plans out the window.

Booth rushed over to them and without thinking, punched Phillip.

"Booth!" Brennan exclaimed, as she watched her date crumple to the floor. "What the hell?"

"He doesn't get to touch you like that," he told her, shaking his stinging hand in the air.

"Like what?" she asked, as a crowd began to form around them. "We were just slow dancing."

"His hand was caressing your back. You didn't feel that?"

"What? I uh…no."

"You're lying. I can tell when you're lying."

"I – uh, what are you doing here? I thought you said you weren't coming?"

"Yeah, I had a plan, but seeing that guy draped all over you…it's a game changer. So now I just kind of want to yell at you."

"I don't understand –"

"What's going on?" Cam asked, cutting her off and pushing her way through the crowd.

Booth noticed that Sweets, the squinterns, and the "replacements" had also made their way to the center of the circle that had formed. "Stay out of this one, Camille. This is between me and Bones."

"Booth –" Brennan tried again.

"No!" Booth cut her off this time. "You don't get to talk. Not yet."

Brennan crossed her arms over her chest in a pout.

"Seeley, you should know she's sort of drunk," Cam managed to get in.

"Don't worry. Drunk or not, she won't be forgetting this conversation," Booth reassured her, never taking his eyes off of Brennan. "So, Bones. What caused you to get drunk this evening? The spirit of the holiday? No, that's not it. The start of a new year has never been that big of a deal for you. Let's try something else. The death of your friends perhaps? Hmm getting closer I see, but that's not quite it, is it? No, you hurt me. And you realized it. And it's bothering you because if you are capable of hurting me this much when we're not even in a relationship, you assume it's going to be a hell of a lot worse if we were to ever start one."

Booth watched as her hands curled into fists, but he didn't stop. He wasn't finished with her yet. "But damn, you want to start one so fucking bad. You're in love with me. But something's stopping you from acting on any of it. Something is making you go out with this guy instead of me. Face it, Brennan; you're terrified just like you always are when it comes to us."

Brennan scoffed, shaking her head, forcing the tears not to come. "You're just jealous. You can't stand to see another man's hands on me because you're so in love. I bet you didn't even love Hannah. You were just doing, what I'm doing now; trying to make myself not love you as much as I do. And clearly, everything worked out really well with her didn't it? Just another woman who can't see herself spending the rest of her life with you. So tell me, Booth, what is it about you that women are so utterly repulsed by? Because I'd like to know, before I make the same stupid mistake."

"I'm not sure what I should focus on more: your insult or the fact that you finally admitted your love for me."

"I'd go with the insult since clearly my love is nothing new to you."

"This is good. Fighting is healthy," Sweets said off to the side.

"How is this healthy?" Cam asked. "I'm having flashbacks to Michelle's graduation party and we all know how that fight ended up…"

"Ha, all right fine," Booth was saying. "Can _you_ see yourself spending the rest of your life with me?"

"How I am supposed to know the answer to that now? We haven't even –"

"Oh, I don't know, maybe because we're raising a child together? The moment Angela and Hodgins gave Katie to us, they bound us together for the rest of that little girl's life. So whether you like it or not, you're stuck with me."

"That doesn't mean that I have to be stuck with you romantically."

"You sure about that?" he asked, stepping closer to her. "Are you sure you can stop picturing my hands being all over you?"

Booth placed his hands on the bare skin of her back that her dress left exposed. An involuntary shiver ran through her body, and he felt it underneath his hands.

"Stop lying to yourself," Booth whispered into her ear. "Your body clearly approves of me touching you."

Brennan placed her hands on his chest and pushed him off of her.

"I really hate to do this again, but I –"

"Then don't do it. Just let this happen, Bones."

"I can't." She couldn't fight the tears from coming any longer and they began to trickle down from her eyes. "As much as I want to, I can't."

"Why? What is it about me that you're utterly repulsed by?"

"Nothing! You're…you're perfect, Booth."

"Then be with me. Why is it so hard for you to just say yes?"

"It'll ruin everything," Brennan admitted with a shrug. "If things go south…our friendship…I can't lose that again. I need us to not hate each other. And with Katie –"

"The only kind of south I see this going has you moaning in pleasure."

"I'm serious, Booth! You don't know what it's like to be in a relationship with me."

"How is it any different from what we're doing now? We're practically dating already; we just don't have sex. I mean, we already love each other. This shouldn't be that difficult."

The clock struck midnight and the band began playing "Auld Lang Syne." But instead of people cheering and yelling out "Happy New Year," all eyes were trained on Booth and Brennan.

"Fine," Booth said, backing away from her. "You want to see what this is like? I'll show you."

"What are you talking about?" Brennan asked, exasperated.

Booth grabbed the nearest woman, and proceeded to give her a midnight kiss. He heard Brennan choke back a sob, so he made the kiss even deeper. The stranger happily kissed him back. He believed it had something to do with the vodka he tasted on her tongue. Booth had expected to feel Brennan's hands ripping him off of the woman, but her hands never came. So instead, he finally broke away from the kiss and turned back to his partner. She was crying harder now, and her hands had come up to cover her mouth.

"It hurts, doesn't it? To see me with someone who isn't you?" he asked her.

"Don't tell me about that kind of pain. I _know_ what it feels like. I was forced to watch her kiss you, and give you presents I had been planning to give you, and steal my sunglasses. I had to watch it for almost a year. You don't need to go around kissing random strangers to prove a point. I _know_ it hurts to watch you be with someone who isn't me, but I still can't risk everything for that. Like I said before, I am not a gambler. I don't have your kind of open heart. We fight so damn much that I can only see this ending badly; ending with us hating each other."

"I could never hate you, Bones."

"Bull shit!" Brennan practically screamed, wiping at her eyes. "Where have you been for the past year and a half? I'm not letting that happen to us again."

"If you keep turning me down, it's going to happen! You wanted this that night at the bar after Hannah turned down my marriage proposal. You wanting to start something when I wasn't ready is the main reason our whole fallout happened! And now that I want to start something again, you aren't ready. I don't understand you!"

"That was before I knew what it was like for you to hate me. And you were right before. It bothers me that I hurt you because if I'm capable of hurting you this much when we're not even in a relationship, I know it's going to be a hell of a lot worse if we were to ever start one."

"So what then? You want us to just keep living together, raising Katie together, and pretending that we don't love each other? Pretending that this conversation never happened?"

"Yes," Brennan said, barely above a whisper.

"It's going to be hard."

"I know."

"Fine," Booth said, clearing his throat. "Do you want a ride home?"

"No, I'll just see you at home later."

Booth nodded and turned to leave. He wanted to laugh at the use of their word, home. It wasn't a home. Not as long as they were kidding themselves like she wanted. It would only ever truly be a home when she let him be hers. And until that happened, he wasn't sure how smooth things were going to be between them. They were going to tune each other out, he was sure of it. Things would never be normal again; not until she let them.

* * *

AN: Drunk Brennan is hard to write. I'm afraid she was a little OOC. Sorry about that. For the next chapter, the M rating will strongly apply. Pray that the powers that be don't remove my story for it… Welp, you know what to do: leave a review! (hey that rhymed.) Or I guess a comment now? WTF FF?


	9. For the First Time

_But we're gonna start by drinking old cheap bottles of wine,_

_Sit talking up all night, saying things we haven't for a while, a while yeah._

_We're smiling but we're close to tears, even after all these years._

_We just now got the feeling that we're meeting for the first time._

* * *

They'd been stepping around on eggshells for a month. They were both afraid that one misspoken word would set the other one off. They hadn't been themselves. They hadn't laughed together in what seemed like forever. They hadn't shared a bottle of wine over dinner. They hadn't talked about their feelings. All they did was talk about Katie because Katie was safe. No one could get hurt talking about her.

And yet today was Valentine's Day, and Brennan was sure Booth was going to use the greeting card holiday to pull out some giant romantic gesture. She was terrified that he would. And as the hours of her day at work ticked by without a fresh body coming in, she found herself _wishing_ that somebody would die today. They could still have all of their flesh, for all she cared. She just needed the excuse to stay at work late tonight.

But Cam popped her head into Brennan's office around five telling her to just go home. She had dinner plans with that gynecologist after all, and she didn't want to keep him waiting when there was no case to be worked upon. So Brennan gathered up her things with a heavy sigh and headed home.

She debated lying about working on some remains from limbo and just crashing at her old apartment tonight. But then she thought about Katie and how she was the only one who could get her to sleep at a decent hour. Booth said it was because she would sing to her, and she really did have a beautiful singing voice; almost as good as Cyndi Lauper. Of course, he hadn't said anything like that since December.

Brennan pushed through the doors of the Hodgins' mansion, half-expecting to see pink and red hearts everywhere. But thankfully, all she found was Booth playing on the floor with Katie. She hung her purse up on the hooks by the door and tossed her keys on the table directly under it. She then wandered into the living room and joined Booth and Katie on the floor.

"Slow day," he commented upon noticing her.

"Yes, it was. Very unproductive."

"So, it's Valentine's Day," Booth started. "Want to go to the shooting range later?"

Brennan laughed and it felt so good to laugh. She honestly couldn't remember the last time she had done so. And now Booth was laughing too; a sound she hadn't even realized how much she missed.

"I doubt they'd let us bring Katie in with us," Brennan told him.

"Oh right, this little one," Booth said, pushing her ball away from her.

"No," Katie replied, pushing herself off the ground and walking over to retrieve her toy.

"I'm so glad that 'no' has become her word of choice," Booth groaned.

"Remember that when she starts dating boys," Brennan smiled.

He groaned again as Katie plopped back down in front him, trying to bounce her ball on the floor.

"She sure does like this thing," he commented, as Katie pushed the ball towards him.

"Hodgins bought it for her when they went to the circus. Perhaps it reminds her of him."

"Maybe," Booth said, pushing it back. "Or maybe she just likes it."

Here they were, talking about Katie again. The conversation had started in dangerous territory, and ended up yet again on the child. Brennan knew it was her fault that things were this way. She knew that, essentially, this is what she had wanted. But all of that didn't make her like it any more. She wanted things to go back to normal; she just wasn't sure how to get them there.

* * *

Katie had finally settled down for the night and Booth wasn't sure what to do with himself. It was Valentine's Day after all and the only thing he wanted to do was talk to Brennan. And he wanted to _really_ talk to her, about more than Katie and work related things. He opened the cabinets in the kitchen, looking for something to make himself a drink, when his eyes landed on a bottle of tequila.

She had tasted like tequila the first time he'd kissed her. And ever since, the sight of tequila always made him think of her. Booth pulled the bottle out of the cabinet, a small smile creeping its way across his lips. _This_ would make her talk to him.

Booth headed to the living room where he found Brennan reading a book about the culture of the Yanomamo. She had explained to him once that Anthropology had four main sub-disciplines: Linguistics, Archeology, Cultural Anthropology, and Physical Anthropology. She was a physical anthropologist. So he couldn't figure out why she always reading about cultural anthropology in her spare time. Perhaps she was just fascinated by all of it. That certainly wouldn't surprise him.

He set the bottle of tequila and the two shot glasses down on the table in front of her.

"What's that?" Brennan asked, looking up from her book.

"What does it look like?"

"Like you're trying to get me drunk like you did to fire me."

_Ah, so she associates tequila with that kiss too…_

"Nah, it's nothing like that," Booth assured her. "I just found this in the kitchen and I thought I'd share."

"I don't know," Brennan said, eyeing the bottle. "The morning of New Year's Day was not nice to me."

"I'm not saying you need to get drunk," Booth told her, filling the two shot glasses. "Just take a shot…or two."

He downed his own and then handed the second one out to Brennan. She sighed, placing her bookmark in her book and taking the tiny glass from him. She took the shot and then placed the glass on the table next to his. Booth refilled them again.

"So," he started before taking his second shot, "get any date offers this year?"

Brennan shook her head, before taking her second shot as well. "No. I guess they all witnessed that lovely little show on New Year's Eve. I don't blame them. I definitely came off as a crazy person."

"Well if you did, I did."

"Yes, but you missed the drunken opening act."

"I'm sure it wasn't that bad."

"I was fighting Cam for a glass of whiskey. I don't even like whiskey."

"Well at least you didn't photocopy your ass anywhere," Booth joked about her Christmas memory of Angela.

"Very true," Brennan laughed, fidgeting with the shot glass in her hands. "I'll take another one."

Booth filled their glasses again, glad to be talking about something new, even if it was skirting around the subject of their fight.

"We should play a game with this," Booth suggested, running his finger around the edge of the shot glass.

"A drinking game? Like in college?"

"You played drinking games in college?"

"Doesn't everybody?"

Brennan took her next shot and Booth followed suit.

"Well I don't know, I guess. I just figured that you were too busy studying to party," Booth confessed.

"There's a lot you don't know about me."

"So then enlighten me."

"Okay well, I didn't really 'party' in college. You were right about that. But that didn't stop my friend Amelia from dragging me to frat parties every now and then."

"Who's this Amelia person?"

"Basically my Angela of college. She was an archeology major, so we had a lot of our core anthropology classes together. She lives in Europe now; moves around a lot with her dig sites. She sends me postcards from time to time, but we're not that close anymore."

"Too bad. I bet you could use a replacement Angela right about now."

"Oh nobody can replace that girl…not even Amelia."

"All right, all right tell me something else."

"Not so fast, mister. If I'm sharing, you're sharing. Go."

"What do you want me to share?" Booth asked with a smirk.

"What do you want to share?" Brennan returned his smirk.

"Okay…let's see…umm there was this party I went to in high school. It was one of those things where the word gets out about the parents being out of town all weekend so everybody shows up to this poor kid's house. I felt bad, man that place got trashed. And you know, some kid got his hands on some alcohol, and being the dumbass that I was, I wanted to try it. I wanted to prove to myself that I could drink, and not get abusive like my father did."

"How'd that work out for you?"

"I was one beer in when the cops showed up and busted the party. I was so scared that I was going to get an MIP that I hid the bathroom until everyone was gone."

"Classy."

"It wasn't my finest moment."

Brennan smiled at him. "I remember being like 10 and it was Christmas and my parents were drinking champagne. Well I decided that I wanted to try some. Russ kept trying to tell me that even _he_ was too young for it, but I insisted. I walked right up to my dad and asked 'may I have a sip?' I remember him spitting out the swallow that had been in his mouth all over my mom's new shoes. He just started laughing. And my mom started complaining about how she had just bought these and now they were ruined. And Russ was trying to yell over them, 'I told her you'd say no.' So everybody was talking at once and I just went up and grabbed my dad's glass and took this huge sip from it…I too spit it back out all over my mom's shoes. So now my mom's yelling at me, and Russ is yelling 'I told you so.' But my dad leans down to me and whispers, 'Next time, Tempe, take a smaller sip.' We used to be such a great family, the four of us."

"God that's great. The best part is, I can totally see Max encouraging you to drink as a ten-year-old. Oh God," Booth chuckled. "You were a lot closer to your family then I realized."

"That's part of the reason why it was so hard for me to forgive them. After everything they just abandoned me, left me to a life of abuse and loneliness."

"You know I've thought about what would have happened to Jared and I if Pops hadn't have been in the picture. I'd honestly probably be dead right now. If my dad didn't kill me I just may have done it myself."

"I don't peg you as the type to commit suicide."

"You don't know the kind of hell I was living."

"Just like you don't know about mine."

They took a few more shots then, trying to clear away the evil cobwebs from their past. Booth admitted several years ago to Sweets and Brennan that if it weren't for Pops he probably would have killed himself. He still believed that to be true, especially when he thought about those years right after his mother left. But Brennan had been much worse off, he knew. And now he was itching to know more about it.

"Tell me something else you've never told me before," Booth instructed, lazily.

"A neolocal residence is when two people marry and take up residence in a place of their own. Although I feel like what we are doing would also be classified as a neolocal residence," Brennan rambled.

He couldn't help but laugh. "No, no Bones. I meant something you've never told me _about yourself_."

"Well then, you should have been more specific."

"Bones…"

Brennan sighed. "Well, what do you want to know?"

He leaned in closer to her, the smell of the tequila wafted from his mouth as he spoke. "Something deeply personal."

"I'm pretty sure you know all of the deeply personal details of my life."

"I highly doubt that. Hey, why don't you tell me how you lost your virginity? That's a story I've never heard. You were like 20 something, right?"

Brennan's smirk faded and she fell completely silent, her eyes darting to the floor.

"Hey, you don't have to be embarrassed, with your high school situation –"

"Booth, I don't think you understand what my late teen years were really like for me."

"Bones, I went to your high school reunion, remember? Mortcia and all that crap…"

"That was just the high school I graduated from. You don't know about anything before that; anything about the families I was with before that."

"Well I know there was that one really terrible family who locked you in the trunk of car for two days. But –"

"They weren't so bad," Brennan shrugged.

Booth's breath hitched in his throat. "How can you say that?"

"Like I said, you don't know what I've been through."

"Enlighten me." When Brennan remained silent, Booth prompted, "How did you lose your virginity, Bones?"

Her gaze stayed trained on the floor and she still wouldn't answer him.

"Look, if you tell me this deeply personal thing about you, I'll tell you something equally deep and personal that I can guarantee I've never told anyone about."

She finally dragged her gaze up to meet his. She nodded a couple of times, tears already forming in her eyes. "I was 15. I had just been placed with my first foster family, the Conways. Things were fine at first, or as fine as they could be considering. But I uh, I wanted to buy this fancy college guidebook. It had all sorts of information about the most prestigious colleges in the nation, and well, you know me. But I didn't have any money. So I brought it up to Rick, the father. And he gave me the money, no problem, simply telling me that I could work it off later. I assumed he meant with chores…"

Booth felt his chest constrict, knowing where this was headed.

"About a week later, he showed up in my room during the middle of the night. He –"  
Brennan sighed choking on her own words. "He raped me. And as the weeks went by he just became more violent. It got so bad that I had to wear pants and sweatshirts even when winter turned to spring just so I could hide the injuries."

"Why didn't you report him to your social worker?" Booth asked his voice barely above a whisper.

"I tried. Rick was just always in the room during her visits and I was afraid to talk with him right there. I mean eventually she found out, but it was only after he pulled me out of school so he could _punish me_."

"Punish you for what?"

"I snuck out. It wasn't like I was meeting a boy or anything, I just…I needed to get out of that house. I only went to the library, but he was waiting for me in my room when I got home…" She looked down at her lap and began clasping and unclasping her hands. "I have never felt so much pain in my entire life. I actually wanted him to kill me, just so it would all be over. The next thing I remembered was waking up in the hospital. My social worker was there, telling me I'd have to testify against him and that I would be moved to another family very soon."

Brennan stilled her hands in her lap, but her gaze remained on the floor. "I remember thinking that if I took too many of the pain meds, I wouldn't have to testify or suffer through another foster family. I could just end it, right then and there. But I didn't, because that's not the kind of person that I am. And so I had to relive everything after they put me on the stand at his trial. I don't know where he is today; if he's still in prison or…If I believed in God, which I don't, I'd say that I pray to God everyday that he will never find me again. Because I just…and I can't…"

She began choking on her sobs, as though she was hyperventilating. Booth pulled her into his arms and started rubbing her back, trying to get her to breathe.

"It's okay, Bones. You're safe now. I've got you," he mumbled into her hair. "I've got you, baby."

Brennan continued to cry in his arms. He just couldn't believe that this had happened to her. He always knew foster care had been rough on her, always knew that she had been abused, but not like this. Booth never would have thought that she'd been raped and tortured on a daily basis.

"God, Bones. I'm so sorry this happened to you. So, so sorry."

"It's not your fault. This was years before you ever met me. Listen, no one knows about this, Booth," Brennan whispered through her tears. "You can't tell anyone. Angela can't –"

She trailed off realizing her mistake, staring back down at the floor. Booth drew her head up to his, so they were looking into each others eyes.

"I won't tell anyone. And if I ever run into this son-of-bitch bastard, he's dead."

"Booth –"

"I'm serious. I will not let him hurt you ever again," he told her, rubbing her cheek with his thumb. "Now let me tell you something about me."

Booth pulled his shirt off over his head and turned his back to her. "Do you see it?"

He felt Brennan's hand brush over his lower back.

"Cigarette burns," she whispered.

"I've always been able to pass them off as birthmarks, but with you…"

"Did your father do this to you?"

Booth turned around to face her, nodding in response.

"Booth, I…I'm sorry he did that to you."

"I'm sorry your foster father did what he did to you."

Brennan noticed that tears were starting to form in his eyes, and she instinctively reached up to wipe them away. "Stop crying. I've already told you that it doesn't fit into my definition of normal."

He let out a small laugh. "Sorry."

"It's fine," Brennan said softly, bringing her hands down to cup his face. "It's f –"

She was cut off as Booth closed the distance between them and kissed her. Her eyes fluttered close as she let the sensation of his lips against hers take over. Brennan dragged her tongue over his lower lip and he opened his mouth to her. Their kiss grew feverish as they began nipping at each others lips. Booth's hands wove through her hair as he pulled her closer to him, craving the familiar taste of her mouth. Brennan moaned into his mouth as one of his hands dropped to her lower back. Her skin felt like it was on fire where his hand was splayed underneath her shirt. Without thinking, she moved to straddle his hips and immediately felt his erection pressing into her thigh. As he began to trail kisses down her neck, she shifted her position so she was rubbing against him, grinding herself on to him.

"Jesus, Bones," Booth breathed.

"Fuck me," she told him, stilling her movement.

"What?" He wasn't sure he had heard her right. Surely those words hadn't come out of Temperance Brennan's mouth; she just didn't talk like that.

"You heard me," Brennan said, tracing the outline of his abs with her index finger.

"Bones, a month ago you were telling me how you didn't want this anymore. And just minutes ago you were telling me about how you were raped. And…and…you're drunk," Booth reminded her, stilling her hand on his stomach.

"So are you," she stated before drawing his mouth back to hers.

He could feel himself growing harder with every touch. He _needed _to be buried inside of her. Screw the fact that this wasn't the best time to being do this. He needed her and he needed her _now. _Booth pulled off her shirt and tossed it next to his on the floor. His hands snaked around her back and unclasped her silky bra, tossing it on the floor as well. It was in that instant he realized that although Brennan had seen him naked before, he had never seen her completely exposed. He took in her soft alabaster skin with his eyes, before taking it in with his mouth.

Brennan moaned as Booth placed wet, hot, open-mouthed kisses on her clavicle. His left hand cupped her breast as his right was busy trying to undo the button on her pants. She could feel her need for him as the throbbing between her legs intensified. Not being able to wait for him any longer, she proceeded to strip the rest of their clothes from their bodies.

"Someone's anxious," Booth laughed as he watched his boxers fall to the floor.

Brennan responded by nipping at his ear and peppering his jaw line with kisses. Booth dropped his hand down between them and lightly dragged a finger across her entrance. She immediately stiffened at the contact, and he couldn't help but notice how wet she was already. He brushed his finger across her a couple of times watching as she basically crumbled under his touch before he plunged it all the way into her. She hissed as he did this.

"Been a while, huh?" Booth smirked, adding another finger inside of her.

"You have no idea," Brennan groaned, rotating her hips around him.

"Tell me, Bones, how long has it been?" he asked, sliding his thumb over her once more.

"I haven't dated anyone in three years, Booth. You do the math."

She had answered him with her eyes closed, trying to push his fingers deeper. _Oh, I can have some fun with this_, Booth thought to himself, slowing removing his fingers from her core. Brennan's eyes flew open and she stared at him in disbelief.

"Do you trust me?" Booth asked, sliding out from underneath her and moving to stand in front of her.

"Yes?" she answered tentatively, fear and desire fused in her eyes.

At that, he crouched down and she let his lips and teeth drag up her thighs until they nipped at the inside of her legs. Brennan relaxed, intoxicated by his low, incoherent mumbling against her skin. She let him open her intimately to his mouth. Her fingers had curved involuntarily against Booth's head as he kissed her there, licking against her gently, coaxing her, lulling her with the tender, slow way he did it until his tongue flicked against her in just the right way and she cried out, ending that endeavor because they both knew that anymore and she wouldn't be able to keep quiet and Katie would be woken up.

So Booth stood up and gently pushed on her shoulders, coaxing her to lie back on the couch. He crawled on top of her, brushing her sweaty hair off of her face. Brennan reached up to stroke him, a motion which drew a long moan from his lips.

"You're asking for it," Booth warned, as she sped up her hand speed.

"Go ahead," Brennan taunted. "Give me everything you have."

And so, he did. Booth thrust his way into her, adjusting her hips with his hands until they eagerly tipped up to meet him. He reached down, curved one of his hands around her thigh and drew it up to his waist, holding her there as he drove impossibly deeper into her body. He ground against her, groaning in pleasure. His voice, low and full of hunger because of her, had nearly sent her into immediate white-hot spasms around him.

Booth would withdraw himself at a painfully slow pace, only to come crashing back into her so fast, that she was sure she was going to pass out in pleasure. She had asked him to fuck her and that was exactly what he was doing. With each thrust, he'd found even deeper millimeters that knocked her breath away as he sank past them and farther into her, riding her in a rocking rhythm so ruthlessly controlled that it had left his arms trembling with the restraint.

She finally came around him, pulling him over the edge with her. The only thing she could see was white-hot light as her body convulsed beneath him. Eventually her breathing evened out and she looked up to find Booth smiling at her.

"What?" she asked, breathless.

"Nothing…just thinking we should do that again."

Brennan smirked, looping her arms around his neck. "Perhaps we should go upstairs. A bed will have more room than this couch does."

Booth's smile morphed into a devilish grin as he scooped her up into his arms and headed toward the stairs.

"Baby, I have not even begun to make you scream yet," he teased.

"Bring it on, _baby_. Just try not to wake Katie, okay?"

"You're the one who screams."

"That's what you think," Brennan scoffed, playfully.

"Oh, it is so on."

"Like I said, bring it."

Booth put her down on his bed and once again crawled on top of her. "You're in for a long night my friend."

"I can handle it. Can you?"

Booth laughed, cupping both of her breasts in his hands. "You know it, Bones. You know it."

He slipped inside of her again, her inner walls tightening around him as they adjusted to being stretched. She bucked against him as he thrust up into her at the same moment that he brought her hips up to meet his. She cried out, unable to stop the sound from escaping from her throat.

"You okay?" Booth asked her.

Brennan could do nothing, but nod as he kissed his way around her jaw line. So, with one deep, searing stroke he pushed impossibly deeper and she screamed, her back arching off the bed. He didn't stop this time however, instead finding a rhythm within her. He pushed again and again, using his hold on her hips to draw her upward every time he invaded her body.

With his next thrust, Brennan felt another scream bubbling in her throat. God, what was he doing to her? Booth's mouth collided with hers just before she could vocalize her pleasure.

He pulled away from the kiss whispering, "I told you, you were a screamer. Now stop before you wake the baby."

In the next instant, Brennan came for him, digging her nails into his back. She arched, her body going rigid as Booth slid his hand between her thighs, teasing her as he slammed into her. Then he slowed down, driving into her with punctuated thrusts which made her wrench her face away from him so she could bury her face into the pillow at her side, determined not to cry from the way her release had left her shattered and weak with relief.

She'd said his name and her heart had come apart, just as surely as her body had. He had come seconds after her, his hand cupping her jaw and bringing her mouth back to his as he made love to her slowly, his tongue tracing her lower lip and drawing it into his mouth until he lost control, biting her accidentally as his body tightened, the muscles on his back jerking violently as he came again.

Booth rolled off to her side, breathing heavily, and Brennan lay mesmerized by the rise and fall of his chest. He turned his head towards her, watching her watch him.

"I love you," he whispered, gently stroking her hair.

"I know," she told him, still not being able to find the words to say it back. She did love him, she knew she did. But at that moment, all of her insecurities were keeping her from returning the sentiment.

AN: I'm rather proud of this chapter. I want to a take a moment and thank all of you for sticking with me. I know it's been a long struggle to get them to this point (and the struggle's not over yet. I mean…) but this is who Brennan is to me. It just feels so out of character to me that she wouldn't fight him about what happened in season 6. And it feels out of character to me the way she just jumped into this relationship with him. I know we missed the early stages of it due to Em's pregnancy, but still. So continue to stay with me; I promise the journey is worth the ride. Also a big thank you to the wonderful reviews from last chapter. Keep 'em coming! ;)


	10. Stupid

_How stupid could I be?_

_A simpleton could see that you're no good for me, but you're the only one I see._

_Everything changes, everything falls apart._

_Can't stop to feel myself losing control, but deep in my senses I know._

* * *

Brennan woke up with a severe pounding in her head. She opened one eye, only to shut it immediately as the sunlight blinded her. It was only then that she realized she was not alone in bed. She opened her eyes into small slits and took notice of Booth snoring softly beside her. Oh God, she'd had sex with Booth last night. Lots and lots of sex. It was then that she noticed she also had a severe pounding between her legs. Perhaps they had been a little too rough last night…The images of his hands on her ass and his mouth on her breasts overwhelmed her as she took in the gravity of the situation.

Normally she would go running to Angela with a problem like this, but she no longer had that option. She realized the only person she had left that she could really talk to, was the person she needed to talk to someone _about_.

She started to remove herself from his bed, when she felt Booth touch her lower back. She involuntarily shivered at the contact. Oh the places those hands had been…

"Morning, Bones," Booth yawned, coaxing her to lay back down with him.

"I should probably go check on, Katie," Brennan tried.

"She's not up yet," Booth stated, gesturing toward the baby monitor which Katie's form of snoring wafted from.

"Booth?"

"Hmm?"

"Did I really ask you to 'fuck me' last night?" Brennan asked, rubbing her temples.

"Those were your exact words, yes."

She groaned in response and finally lay back down next to him. "I promise I don't normally talk like that."

"Yeah, I know," Booth laughed. "Tequila does something to you, I've noticed."

Brennan groaned again, burying her head in her hands.

"So I have to ask," Booth started, "where did you learn how to do that thing with your tongue?"

Brennan's cheeks turned bright red and she found that she couldn't look directly at his smug face. "I did that last night?"

"You don't remember?"

"I just remember a lot of sex. I don't really recall specifics."

Booth propped himself up on his elbow so he could look down at her. "You weren't kidding when you've awkwardly announced several times that you're very good in bed."

"Why would I kid about that?"

He laughed and bent down to kiss her. She couldn't help but notice how they still tasted like each other. She held his head there for a minute, still not believing what had happened.

"Everything's going to change now, isn't it?" Brennan asked softly, once she finally allowed him to pull away.

"Everything has already changed, Bones. This just means…we're finally together, I guess. You want that, don't you?"

Brennan nodded. "I suppose that it's about time that I tell the truth on this topic. After all, I told you about Rick Conway last night, which somehow lead to us having sex… So anyway, I've never stopped wanting it. I mean I've wanted since…oh I don't know. There have been several moments in our history, when I have seriously considered starting something with you."

"Like when?" Booth asked, mindlessly twirling a strand of her hair around his index finger.

"Well, the first time I realized I had feelings for you was when you were shot and I thought you had died. I just kept thinking about how you would never really know how I felt about you. But I was just so angry with you for faking the whole thing and not telling me, that I never acted on my feelings. And then the Gravedigger had you and I felt that same fear that I'd never get to tell you. But even after I rescued you, I never told you. And of course the fear appeared again when you were diagnosed with that brain tumor. I was going to say something, I was, but…"

Brennan sighed running a hand through her hair. "I just couldn't. You were going into surgery and I didn't want to cause you anymore worry. You were already so nervous. And then you woke up from that coma and thought that I was your wife…"

Booth pulled her into his arms, but remained silent as she continued. "That next year, I came so close to saying something, so many times. But it never happened. I was just so fearful of rejection or something, I don't… I have, figuratively speaking of course, kicked myself everyday for turning you down when you finally found the courage to bring it up. I just don't let people in very easily, and I was afraid of letting you in all the way. I didn't want to lose what we had, which is why I believe I kept trying to suppress everything that I was feeling. And when you came back from Afghanistan, I was going to tell you everything that I just said now, but you told me about Hannah instead. I've hated myself everyday since then, knowing that if I had just said something, we'd already be together."

"Bones –"

"No, let me finish. I need to apologize about New Year's Eve. I should have just told you yes that night. I'm still terrified about this whole thing, but I want to really give it a try now. I'm incredibly sorry it took me so long because if this was all that I've been missing, I could have used it a hell of a lot sooner."

Booth laced his fingers in between hers and kissed her again. "Bones, I uh…I have a confession to make."

"Please don't tell me that you've never had feelings for me…"

"No! No, that's not it at all. This…this is about Hannah."

"Okay," Brennan said, shifting away from him slightly.

"When I broke up with Hannah…you were there for me and that was great; it meant the world to me. You've always been there for me, no matter what I do and I just…it's one of the things I love about you. You're such a supportive friend and I never thank you for it, so thank you."

Booth took a deep breath before continuing. "When I was with Hannah, when we first met, I was still hurting…from you. So when we had sex for the first time, I uh, I pretended that she was you. And it makes me wonder if I was ever really in love with her or if it was just me in love with the idea of being with you. I mean I _knew_ she wasn't you, but… and when I came back you were here and she was here, so of course I knew then that she wasn't you. But you know what? I decided that I could use Hannah to make you jealous. You would see us happy together and you would just crack and say something. And it worked; you did. But when it happened, when I got what I wanted… I just sat there and told you no. Told you I wouldn't give everything up just for you. I fucking asked if I could call anyone for you! What the hell? I was such a dick. You were sitting next to me, bawling, and I was busy trying to pass you on to someone else. The old me would've pulled you into a hug, but I don't know where that guy is anymore. Me? I'm just an idiot; an asshole. You're always there for me, and I couldn't even be there for you. It was what I wanted and I couldn't even say yes."

Brennan remained silent next to him. He was dying to know what was going through her mind, but he couldn't let her yell at him until he had confessed everything.

"And then Sweets…he starts telling me that he doesn't want to end up like me, he wants to be married by the time he's my age. And I just got so mad. It brought back _everything._ Rebecca turned down my marriage proposal, you wouldn't even start anything with me, and here I had Hannah. We got along well, the sex was good, she was gorgeous…and so I decided that I was going to prove a point to you and to Rebecca even. I had this woman that I could spend 30 or 40 or 50 years with, and she wasn't you. I proposed to her _to hurt you_. And I don't know why because you had just told me that you wanted me, but for some idiotic reason, I wasn't done hurting you yet. Which is stupid because I promised you that I would never hurt you. I was supposed to be that one stable person in your life. I mean I know you have… had Angela, but what we have…had…God Bones, I am so sorry, for all of it. All of it, especially at Michelle's grad party I had no right…It's not your fault that your family left you like they did and I shouldn't have been using it against you like that. It was such a low asshole move. I'm so, so sorry. Please forgive me. Please, Bones, I need to know that we're okay…just please. I'm sorry."

Brennan covered her mouth with her hand and closed her eyes. Booth noticed the tears rolling down her cheeks. And yet still, she remained silent and unmoving.

"Please say something, Bones. Anything."

"Why would you do that to me?" she asked softly, without opening her eyes.

"I don't know. I was just so mad and –"

"No. Why would you tell me all of that?"

"I don't –"

"I don't want to hear about how you _fucked_ her. I didn't need to know that the whole time, you were thinking about me. And what were you thinking, proposing to her? You honestly think that if you had married her, just to get back at me for telling you no, you two would have been happy? You would have probably ended up cheating on her…with me!"

"I don't cheat," Booth said defensively.

"Yeah, but if I was the only thing you could think about when you were with her, eventually you would have wanted to turn the fantasy into a reality. It's basic psychology."

"You hate psychology," Booth stated trying to reach for her wrist.

"Don't!" Brennan yelled, jumping out of the bed. "Last night was a mistake. Don't ever let me drink tequila again."

And with that, she walked away from him to go find Katie.

* * *

Booth sat at the Royal Diner, mindlessly twirling his spoon in his coffee awaiting Cam's arrival. He knew he was in for an earful of 'I told you so' comments and disapproving looks, but after the time he and Brennan had spent fighting with each other, he was use to it. Cam really had become his makeshift Brennan, whether she wanted to be or not.

Katie had been left in the capable hands of their usual sitter since Brennan had seemingly disappeared. He'd debated bringing the child with him to the diner, but had decided against it, figuring he might go out looking for Brennan after his conversation with Cam.

Ten minutes later he heard her heels clacking on the floor and her accusatory tone ring out throughout the diner. "What the hell did you do?"

Booth waited until she had settled down next to him on a bar stool and had her own cup of coffee warming her hands before he spoke. "I took your advice. Turns out you were wrong. Now fix it."

"Okay back up. What happened exactly?"

He took a long sip of coffee, letting it burn his tongue because he knew he deserved it. "Bones and I got drunk off of tequila last night, confessed some things about our past, and had sex. When we woke up, she went into this rant about how she's always felt something for me and how she's sorry it's taken her so long to just tell me yes…and it all just made me feel so guilty…so I told her about the Hannah thing."

"And she didn't take it well?"

"If she had, would I be talking to you right now?"

"Okay, okay I get it. What did she say?"

"Basically that she would have preferred not to know about any of it. I knew I shouldn't have told her. But I just couldn't get your voice out of my head. And now we will never get our old relationship back. Thanks a lot, Camille, you've been really helpful."

"Seeley…" Cam sighed trailing off and deciding to take a sip of her coffee before she continued. "I'm sorry. I didn't think –"

"Damn right you weren't thinking! It's clearly a bad idea to tell someone that you've been purposely trying to hurt them."

Cam groaned, pushing her bangs out of her eyes. She had really been meaning to get those cut… "Did she say anything else before she left?"

"Just that if I had married Hannah I probably would have ended up cheating with her and that last night was a mistake and she's never going to drink tequila again."

"Well I can call the lab and see if she –"

"No, she wouldn't have gone there. It'd be too easy for me to find her there."

"Maybe she wants you to find her."

"I highly doubt that," Booth muttered, aimlessly twirling his spoon in his coffee again. "You didn't see the pain etched into her face. Seriously, how am I such a screw up? Things were perfect, right where I've always wanted them to be and then…disaster. Maybe she was right on New Year's Eve…I _am_ utterly repulsive to women."

"You're not…trust me."

Booth gave her a half-smile in return. "Any last advice, despite the fact that your first batch got me into this whole mess?"

"Okay first of all, I wasn't the one who decided to use Hannah to hurt Brennan. That one is all on you. And secondly, beg for forgiveness? I mean I feel like all you can really do now is wait for her."

"If I just sit back and wait, I'll never get her back."

"Well, what other choices do you have?"

* * *

Brennan wasn't sure how she had ended up here, at the cemetery, of all places. She remembered getting into her car, overwhelmed with emotions, and just driving. Driving to get away from him and from everything. She was even more shocked at herself for passing by her mother's grave. After the holidays and all of the secret sharing last night, she was sure her dazed state had brought her to Christine Brennan.

But that wasn't the case. Instead the names Angela Montenegro and Jack Hodgins stared back at her from beneath the February snow. It felt like she was in a dream, like everything that had happened hadn't been real. And yet staring at their gravestones made everything almost too real, as more emotions threatened to overwhelm her.

"I don't even know why I'm here, let alone talking to you," Brennan started, her voice quavering with the threat of tears. "It's not like you can hear me or anything. You're dead. It's just…you brought me here on the anniversary of my mom's death and wanted me to talk to her…just like Booth did right after we'd buried her."

At the mention of his name her voice faltered, but she continued like it hadn't happened. "I suppose I am here to pay my respects. You taught me that after all. So here I am."

Brennan fell into silence then, feeling ridiculous talking to herself. The only sounds were those of the wind whistling occasionally through the trees and the distant noise of the highway. There was nobody here but her and a bunch of bones. But that thought inspired her, for she had always said that she felt the most comfortable around the dead.

"Speaking of Booth…we uh…we had sexual intercourse, something I'm sure you'd be proud of for some odd reason. And you were right, we were quite compatible together. But of course, as it always seems to be with us, the happiness didn't last long. He told me these things that I really had no desire to hear and I just got so mad at him that I somehow ended up here."

She bent down and brushed off the snow that had yet to melt away from their headstones. Their date of death was now staring back at her, and she felt herself become light headed. So Brennan straightened back up and focused her gaze on a tree off in the distance.

"Did you know that he was just using Hannah to hurt me? I'd like to think that if you'd known you would have told me, but I'm under the impression that Cam knew and she never said anything. And I don't know if I'm more upset by the fact that he was trying to hurt me or by the fact that he decided to tell me about it. See now this? This is why I didn't want to admit to myself that I loved him. Love only comes with pain. Why did you write me that note, Ange? To torture me? Because that's what it's been doing."

She bit down on her lower lip, no longer able to keep her tears at bay. "I don't want to love him, but I do. And I don't know how because all we ever do is hurt each other. He told me that he loved me last night and I couldn't even say it back. Kind of glad that I didn't now, but I don't think that stops him from knowing how I feel." Brennan drew in a shaky breath. "I just feel like I have no one. I feel completely alone and I just really need you right now."

She knelt down in the snow, tracing the letters of Angela's name with her index finger. "I need my best friend back. I can't make it without you. You remember what I mess I was when we first met…you saved me, fixed me, and I just really need you to do that again right now, okay?"

Brennan was met with silence, which she should have been expecting, but instead the silence only spurred to anger her.

"How could you do this to me?" she yelled, slapping the headstone and ignoring the pain that shot through her palms. "How could you leave me here all alone?"

She suddenly turned her attention to Hodgins' stone for the first time since arriving. "Were you driving? Of course you were. This is your fault! Why weren't you paying attention to the roads? You're the one who took her from me! How could you? After everything we've been through? We were buried alive together. How could you?"

Brennan collapsed in on herself, as the pain overwhelmed her. She felt her body shake with the violence of her sobs as her snow-soaked clothing chilled her to the bone. She found herself wishing that Booth had followed her here so he could appear out of his hiding place to hold her. But he never came. No one came, therefore highlighting her earlier point that she was alone.

How did her life get to this? She was happy once; in those years before Afghanistan and Maluku. And now she had resorted to crying and yelling at headstones to make up for the loneliness she feared she would never escape. She felt trapped in this limbo between happiness and pain, and whenever she found herself headed in one direction, the other would pull her back. She couldn't win.

Brennan glanced back over at the headstones, trying yet again to judge the reality of the situation. "Beloved mother and father," she whispered the inscriptions beneath their names.

_Katie._ Her daughter that she, in a way, shared with Angela. How could she have forgotten about that precious little girl? Here she was feeling so lost and alone, when that girl had lost just as much as she had. And if it wasn't for her and Booth, she probably would have ended up in the foster system, dealing with her own Rick Conway's. Brennan just couldn't bear to think about that.

Slowly, she pushed herself to her feet and stared back down at the graves in front of her. She wiped at her face and her wet clothing as though it would make a difference. Brennan attempted to regain her composure as though her last few moments of hysteria had never occurred.

"I want you guys to know that we're taking good care of your daughter. Despite our fighting and these new mental breakdowns of mine, Katie hasn't been affected. We're staying strong for her. And Booth convinced me to let her believe in Santa, even though I still think it's wrong to lie to children. He's actually quite good with her, but he's good with Parker, so I should have known he'd be great with her too. I just wish he'd figure out how to be great with me."

Brennan sighed pushing her hair out of her face. "I mean there was a time when he'd do anything for me. He'd kill for me, _die_ for me. And I just can't help but wonder if he's that same man anymore. How can someone who's willing to do anything to protect you, end up being the one who hurts you the most?"

She allowed her last question to hang in the silence and listened as a squirrel chattered its way up a tree.

"Well thanks for listening, Ange. Even though you could never say anything back, it's nice to know I still have you to vent to. Until next time…"

Brennan turned and followed her footprints back out of the cemetery. She paused to visit her mother's grave, silently wishing that she too had never died. And then her phone was vibrating in her pocket…again. She knew it was Booth without even checking it. She let it go to voicemail…again. But as she turned to leave her mother's grave, it started up yet again.

With a groan, Brennan fished it out of her pocket, struggling with the touch screen with her gloved hand.

"What?" she demanded into her phone.

"We have a body," Booth said, almost with an edge to his voice.

"Can't you take one of the interns with you?"

"You're that mad at me, you won't even come do your job?"

"The interns need more field time. I think it's about time they get some experience outside of the lab. Take Fischer; he's next in the rotation."

"Bones –"

"What?"

"Are…are you coming home tonight or are you going to sleep at your apartment?"

"I haven't decided yet."

"Well, will you let me know what you do so I don't think you're lying in a ditch somewhere?"

"Why would I be lying in a ditch?"

"Just call me all right? Can you do that?"

"Fine."

"Fine."

He hung up. Brennan sighed, shoving her phone back down in her pocket. Was he really mad at her? She hadn't done anything. He was the one who hurt her, not the other way around. It was enough to make her decide to just sleep at her own apartment tonight. Let him struggle with getting Katie to sleep; it was his own damn fault for pushing her away. She decided to wait to inform him of this until he was home so he could put Katie on the phone for her to say goodnight to. That little girl was all she had left after all.

* * *

AN: Brennan's breakdown in the cemetery inspired by Piper in "Hell Hath No Fury." Holla at my Charmed fans!

And okay yes, you hate me right now. But do we not all hate Shonda for finally allowing Lexie to pour her heart out to Mark only to kill her off in a plane crash? Did we not all hate Marlowe for introducing Josh right after Castle ended things with Gina? And of course, did we not all hate Hart from the end of "The Parts in the Sum of the Whole" up to the last mention of Hannah? And yet, we always come back don't we? The fluffy, happy times will come. Just stick with me.


	11. Keep Breathing

_Storm is calling, but I don't mind._

_People are dying, I close my blinds._

_And all I can do is keep breathing. All I can do is keep breathing._

_All I can do is keep breathing now. _

* * *

A week had passed since he'd made love to her. A week had passed since she basically told him that she loved him and wanted to start a relationship. A week had passed since he'd fucked everything up.

Booth sat at his desk, staring at the case file in front of him. The body he and Fischer had brought back to the lab had been identified as a male teenage runaway. It was the type of case that he absolutely hated. He knew Brennan wasn't taking it very well either, despite her neglect to talk to him.

Thankfully she had only spent two nights at her apartment. However, just because she was living with him again, didn't stop her from freezing him out. She had only spoken to him at work this past week, and even those words had been minimal. It was enough to make him wonder if she was talking to _anyone_.

"Agent Booth?"

He looked up and found Sweets standing in the doorway of his office.

"Sweets. What's up?"

"Well Cam told me about what's been going on between you and Dr. Brennan and –"

"Look, I'm going to stop you right there, Sweets. You're not our psychologist anymore."

"I'm here as a friend, all right?"

"Okay, fine. What?"

"Is she talking to you yet?"

"Not unless it's something regarding our victim."

"The runaway?"

"Yeah."

Sweets made his way into Booth's office and sat down in the chair in front of his desk. "I'm really sick and tired of the two of you fighting."

"Sweets –"

"No, I'm serious. It's been over a year of this crap and it needs to stop. You need to fix this."

"Don't you think I'm trying? Because I am. Do you think I like fighting with her? Because I don't. Do you think I wanted to tell her about the Hannah thing? Because that was Cam's fault for pushing me."

"I don't care whose fault anything was. All I know is that you two need to get your acts together. All of this fighting can't be good for Katie."

"We don't fight around her. We don't even talk around her."

"Okay I really don't think the silence is any better than fighting. She can probably sense that something is wrong."

"So what do you suggest I do, exactly? I've told her I was sorry dozens of times. I've tried to talk to her and she won't respond. I know she needs time, but how much? How much time does it take to get over the person you trust the most hurting you in the worst way possible?"

"Well, I don't have all the answers. Perhaps a grand gesture of some sort is in order."

"Like what?"

"You know her better than I do," Sweets said with shrug, standing up and heading toward the door.

"You know this talk hasn't been all that helpful," Booth called after him.

Sweets just waved his hand in response and left Booth alone to his thoughts.

* * *

"I still don't understand why this is my job," Annah complained in her fake French accent. "I'm an artist, not a forensic scientist."

"Yes, but this job calls for a forensic artist. Therefore, trying to match the weapon to the size and shape of the fracture in the skull is part of your job. You were told this when we hired you," Brennan explained impatiently.

"Why can't you just do it?"

"Because," Brennan started through gritted teeth, "it's not my job."

"Dr. Brennan, I found some non-insect particulates on the body. What would you like me to do with them?" Dr. Wessland asked.

"Find a botanist to identify them," she mumbled under her breath.

"I'm sorry, what?"

"Just give them to me," Brennan sighed, holding out her hand.

He placed the Petri dish of the mixed particulates in Brennan's outstretched hand and then returned to his microscope.

"Anything in there to help determine the murder weapon?" Annah asked, peering over her shoulder.

"I don't know. Dr. Wessland mixed them all together so I have no way of knowing what came from where. And besides that, I haven't begun to look at them yet. Will you just go examine the dimensions of the fracture?"

"Fine," she huffed, walking back to her office. "Let me know if you find anything useful."

Brennan clenched her empty hand into a fist and took a deep breath. She was beginning to debate the idea of Hodgins' old rubber band trick that he used to use to help control his anger. She returned to her office and placed the Petri dish down on her desk. She then turned to her bookshelf and pulled down one of Hodgins' thick volumes of botany. She'd identified the plants in the last two cases, even though it had taken her nearly a week to do so both times. So there was no reason she couldn't identify them again.

She began sifting through the mixed contents Dr. Wessland had presented her with and came across something that could either be a thread or a piece of hair. Her magnifying glass was not powerful enough to discern the difference. With a groan, she pushed herself out of her chair and brought the evidence to Cam's office.

"I need to know if this is human hair or something else," she told her.

Cam looked up, confusion crossing her face. "And this is your job because…"

"Because there is no Hodgins to do it for me."

"Couldn't Fischer –"

"No, I told him to help Annah identify the murder weapon. Look, you really need to hire a botanist. I can't keep pretending that I am one. We're going to get caught up in a high profile case one of these days and when I'm forced to testify that my botany knowledge is self-taught, things won't end so well."

"I've been trying. None of our applicants seem qualified enough and I'm trying to avoid hiring another Annah or Dr. Wessland."

"We're getting desperate, Cam. Just pick one."

Cam sighed and moved to take the evidence in question from Brennan. She placed it under her microscope.

"It's a black hair," she concluded.

"That's not helpful at all. Our victim had black hair."

"Sorry," Cam shrugged, handing it back over to her. "You still fighting with Booth?"

"That's really none of your business."

"You're my friends. That makes it my business."

"You knew," Brennan said softly. "You knew what he was doing with Hannah, and you didn't tell me. That hardly makes you my friend."

"In my defense, I didn't know until she rejected his marriage proposal. He didn't talk a whole lot to me either when he was with her. And besides, what good would my telling you even do? You told him that you were mad because he told you, not because he did it."

"Of course I'm mad that he did it! But I am more upset that he told me, seeing as how things would be just fine right now if he hadn't."

"I think you should give him another chance; accept his apology."

"How many more chances does he get?"

"He's not the only one who's screwed up your relationship you know? You're just as guilty as he is."

"Thanks for identifying the hair sample," Brennan said, turning to leave.

"Avoid this as long as you want, Brennan. It's not going anywhere!" Cam called after her.

* * *

"All right, Miss Katie, which book should we read tonight?" Brennan asked.

Katie walked over to her little bookshelf and pulled down the book with the brightest cover; something titled "Chicka Chicka Boom Boom." She brought it back over to Brennan, who was sitting in the rocking chair. Brennan helped her up onto her lap and began to read.

"I don't think we've read this one together yet. All right, let's find the page where it starts. Ah, here we go. A told B, and B told C, 'I'll meet you at the top of the coconut tree.' 'Whee!' said D to E F G, 'I'll beat you to the top of the coconut tree.' Chicka Chicka Boom! Boom! Will there be enough room?"

Brennan continued reading and Katie giggled along in delight. It was a very odd book about letters trying to climb a tree, but she supposed it helped the child to learn the alphabet.

"A is out of bed and this is what he said, 'Dare double dare, you can't catch me. I'll beat you to the top of the coconut tree. Chicka Chicka Boom! Boom! Chicka Chicka Boom! Boom! Chicka Chicka Boom! Boom! Boom!" Brennan finished and closed the book.

Katie clapped and then took the book from her, climbed down from her lap, and ran to get another.

"Now who said you get two bedtime stories tonight?" Brennan laughed.

Katie giggled and returned to her lap carrying "Goodnight Moon."

"All right. One more. But only because I enjoy this story," Brennan told her with a smile. "In the great green room, there was a telephone, and a red balloon, and a picture of the cow jumping over the moon. And there were three little bears, sitting on chairs, and two little kittens and a pair of mittens. And a little toy house and a young mouse. And a comb and a brush and a jar full of mush. And a quiet old lady who was whispering 'hush.'"

She could feel Katie drifting off in her arms as she continued reading. "Goodnight stars, goodnight air, goodnight noises everywhere."

"Goodnight mama," Katie yawned before she fell completely asleep on Brennan's lap.

"Oh Katie, I'm not –" Brennan started. "Yes, sweet girl, I'm your mama now."

She could feel those ever present tears forming in her eyes as she laid Katie down in her crib. It was all finally sinking in. She was a mother. She was Katie's mother. And Katie was too young to tell the difference between her and Angela. She left the little girl to sleep, before her sobs became too loud and woke her.

Brennan met Booth in the hallway. One look at her tears and his face instantly filled with concern.

"What's wrong?" he asked her.

"It's nothing."

"Come on, Bones. Why are you crying?"

"It's just…It's just Katie called me 'mama.' And I love that she did, but I also hate that she did because Angela…"

"Hey, it's okay, I get it," he whispered, tentatively rubbing her back. She didn't resist. "I get it."

"I still miss them so much. And Katie…she's too young to even miss her own parents. She thinks that _we_ are her parents."

"We are her parents…I miss them too you know. Angela always had a real soft spot for me. Maybe it was because she wanted us to get together more than we did ourselves, but…God she was great. She had that smile that could just light up a room. And Hodgins? We became really close there towards the end. I mean I always liked the guy, but…"

Brennan nodded, keeping her eyes trained on the floor. Booth took in her appearance. Her hair was up in one of those high ponytails that he secretly adored and she was wearing sweats…wait a second…

"Did you take that from my closet?" he asked, referring to the too big FBI sweatshirt that hung off her body at odd angles.

"You left it at my apartment before you left for Afghanistan. It used to smell like you. Now it just smells like me," Brennan answered quietly.

It made Booth's heart clench. She wore this sweatshirt because _it used to smell like him._ How had he been so blind to this in the past?

"Hey, I have an idea. Come downstairs with me," he told her.

"Why?"

"Come downstairs and I'll show you."

Brennan allowed him to take her by the hand and lead her into the living room. She sat down on the couch while Booth pulled out a DVD.

"What is that?" she asked.

"I'm not sure. I found it in a box marked 'home movies.' There were dozens of DVDs in there. I just picked this one. I figured that maybe seeing them again might help the both of us. What do you think?"

"Put it in."

Booth did and pressed play on the DVD player and the old home movie whirred to life. It was the Jeffersonian's annual summer picnic and the date stamp indicated that it was the year after his brain surgery. The year when things had been absolutely perfect until he opened his big mouth, deciding to take a gamble on their relationship. It was the year before Hannah and when everything went to hell. And this picnic? It was probably his all time favorite memory of her; next to the few kisses he'd been able to steal from her over the years.

He looked over at Brennan and noticed she was as enthralled as he was; no doubt lost in the same thoughts. He knew her favorite picture of them had been taken on this day, the one he'd found in her drawer when he was looking for Angela's note.

Booth turned his attention back to the video. Hodgins' voice filled the room in a way that was both comforting and eerie.

"_Ah, isn't it just beautiful out today, Angie? So glad the bosses were finally able to put this stupid picnic on a day where it's not pouring buckets for once."_

"_Jack, what's with the camera?" _

_Hodgins spun the camera away from the lake view he'd been previously filming and onto Angela's zoomed in face. As he zoomed out, Angela raised an eyebrow at him waiting for an explanation. _

"_I never have any reason to use it. Thought this would be as good as anything."_

"_Glad to know 'stupid work picnics' rank so high on your list." _

"They weren't even married yet," Brennan mumbled next to him.

"They should have been."

"No kidding."

"_Oh come on, I didn't mean it like that. And try to tell me what's going on behind you isn't precious," Hodgins told her. _

_As Angela turned her head, he zoomed in on the scene. Booth and Brennan were playing football with Parker. Brennan and Parker were currently participating in a game of keep away from Booth. Their mixture of laughter filled the air._

"_They look like the perfect little family, don't they?" Angela commented. _

"_Yeah…are they ever going to get together?" _

_Angela sighed, shaking her head a little. "I've been pushing for years and nothing. They're both just so freaking stubborn."_

"_You realize that if either of them ever sees this tape, we're dead?"_

"_Well I don't plan on ever showing them, do you?"_

Oh Hodgins, the irony of your statement. The reason they were watching this now was in fact because they were dead. But Booth knew Hodgins' statement wasn't meant to be quite so literal. He chanced another glance at Brennan. She was hunched over, with her elbows resting on her thighs and her hands clasped together near her lips. Her eyes were still wet with tears.

"_You know I really thought his brain tumor would do it for them; thought it would seal the deal," Hodgins was saying. _

"_Nah, they've almost lost each other one too many times and it still hasn't had an effect on them. They're just…really good friends." _

"_No, _you_ and Brennan are really good friends. Booth and Brennan…"_

"_Have what we used to have?"_

"_Have _more _than what we used to have," Hodgins laughed. "I mean, look at them."_

"_Stop it, Booth! That's cheating!" Brennan scolded with a breathy laugh. _

"_How do you know what the rules of football are? You think a touchdown is called a goal." _

"_They use goal posts, why wouldn't it be called a goal?"_

"_Because this isn't soccer."_

"_You know, in every other country soccer is called football. Ergo, I'm right." _

"_No, Bones, you're not. This is _American_ football. Not European football. _

_Brennan huffed and made her way towards Hodgins and Angela, still holding the ball._

"_Where are you going?" Booth called after her._

"_Bones, you still have the ball!" Parker exclaimed. _

"_What are you videotaping?" Brennan asked, squinting her eyes in confusion. _

"_Life," Hodgins stated bluntly._

_Brennan turned to look at Angela, looking even more confused than before. _

"_I don't know. He thinks he's Steven Spielberg or something today," Angela answered. Brennan remained to look confused. "Oh sweetie, please tell me you know who that is." _

"_Oh, I do. I'm just still trying to figure out why."_

"_Because I can," Hodgins said. _

_Booth approached the group with stealth. He placed a finger to his lips, signaling his intent to surprise Brennan. Suddenly, he jumped on top of her from her behind. Brennan shrieked as they both fell to the ground and Booth broke out into a fit of laughter. _

"_What are you doing?" she exclaimed._

"_You have the football. I'm tackling you." _

_He plucked the ball out of her hands and ran off back towards Parker. _

"_You are so going to pay for that," Brennan smiled, pushing herself up and running after him. _

"_They are so cute, it's disgusting," Angela commented. _

"_Seriously, they're acting like love sick teenagers." _

"_Well, Bren never got the chance to be an actual teenager, so I say just leave them be." _

_Meanwhile, Brennan had caught up to Booth and was attempting to tackle him to the ground. _

"_Give it up, Bones. This is FBI trained strength you're dealing with here."_

_She waited until he turned his back, and then she proceeded to kick his feet out from under him, causing him to fall hard onto his back. _

"_Give it up, Booth. This is mixed martial arts training you're dealing with here." _

_He groaned in response. Brennan extended her hand to him, a gesture to help him up. Booth took her hand, but instead of standing up, he pulled her to the ground with him. She stumbled on top of him, a blush instantly coloring her cheeks. She pushed herself up and ended up straddling his hips. Their eyes locked and their breath caught in their throats. _

"_What the hell are they doing?" Hodgins asked._

"_Having a moment. It's what they do," Angela answered. _

"_What are you two doing?" Parker asked, walking up to them with the football. _

"_Uh," they both stammered, awkwardly trying to stand up._

"_Bones, just, uh tackled me, buddy," Booth tried. "Now let's get back to our game!"_

"_Okay!" Parker said excitedly, handing his dad the football. "I'll go long!"_

_Booth looked back over his shoulder at Brennan. She smiled at him, shaking her head. _

"_You think they've slept together yet?" Hodgins mused aloud._

"_What?" Angela asked in response._

"_Booth and Brennan. I think they've had sex." _

"_They haven't."_

"_That you know of."_

"_Trust me, Jack. I would _know_." _

"_Just because you think she would tell you, doesn't necessarily mean that she would."_

"_Please. I can read her body language. She and Booth haven't slept together…yet."_

_Hodgins laughed and the video camera shook as he did so. "God, I really hope they never find this tape."_

"_Maybe we should just burn it."_

"_Nah, I think I'll save it for their wedding."_

"_Brennan doesn't believe in marriage." _

"_Just wait and see, Ange. Wait and see."_

The screen went black, signaling the end of the video. Booth stopped it before another one could start. He looked over at Brennan and found her staring at him.

"A part of me wishes that they just faked their deaths in an attempt to get us back together. I just keep waiting for them to show up…"

She started crying harder and Booth pulled her into his arms, not caring whether she was still mad at him or not. He was happy to feel her returning the embrace, her arms snaking around his torso and her head falling onto his chest.

"We can fix this Bones, fix us. We can be those people again."

"Don't you understand?" Brennan asked softly. "We can never be those people again."

"Why do you say that?"

She pulled away from him and he immediately regretted his desire for an explanation.

"Because that version of us hadn't been burned by love. That version of us didn't know what it was like to hate. We were happy. Everyone could see it. I mean everyone knew how in love we were except for us. I don't think we can ever get that back."

"We've been through hell and back together and you just want to give up on us? Why won't you fight for us?"

"Why are you?"

"You can't be serious."

"It's been over for a long time. We never would have worked out anyway."

"Don't you dare do this to me again! We are still those people. Yes, we've hurt each other a lot since then, but deep down we are still those people. And may I remind you that just last week you wanted a relationship? I know that you're mad at me, but please, don't let that one thing force you to give up on us. Think back to what we just watched on that DVD; think back to the day of that picnic. We're good together, Bones, really, really good."

"But Booth –"

"No. Remember when I pulled you down to the ground with me and you ended up straddling my hips? Do you remember how later we joked about doing it again later without the pants? Yeah it didn't happen then, but it happened last week and it was amazing. Everything about you is amazing. So please Bones, I'm begging you; don't give up on us."

Brennan finally drew her eyes up to meet his.

"I just want to go back to that time, Booth. And we can never go back. You can't take back what happened."

"But we can move forward. We can move forward together."

Brennan put her left hand on his cheek and drew the pad of her thumb across his lips.

"I want to," she whispered. "I want to so bad."

"You have an odd way of showing it," Booth laughed.

"I just… you were willing to marry a woman you didn't even love, vow before your god that you were going to spend the rest of your life with her, just to hurt me. And you're right, you're not the type of man who cheats or gets divorced. So if she had said yes, and you had gone through with it… we both would have been miserable for the rest of our lives."

"I knew she wouldn't say yes. She had told me before that she never wanted to get married."

"So then why didn't you just break up with her? Wouldn't that have been the easier option?"

"Bones, I don't know how else to apologize for what I've done. I'm sorry. I am. I hate that I've intentionally hurt you. If I could take it all back, I would, but I can't. So give me this chance now. Let me prove how great we can be together."

"I can't do that. I don't trust you the way that I used to."

Booth closed his eyes and leaned his forehead against hers.

"I love you," he whispered. "And I'm never going to stop trying. You and I belong together, Bones. At least give me time to prove it."

"Fine. You have until March."

"That's only a week. You need to give me more than a week."

"How much time do you need?"

"As long as it takes."

"Booth –"

"Okay, okay, March 15. That was the day that I knew we were more than just partners."

"What day was that?"

"The day we sang _Hot Blooded_ for the first time, and your fridge blew me up, and I saved your life for the first time. The day when you looked into my eyes after I saved you, and hugged me, and I just knew."

"March 15," Brennan agreed. She stood up and kissed the top of his head. "Thank you for the movie. Good night, Booth."

"Night, Bones. Thank you for giving me this chance."

"Don't screw it up," she smirked before heading upstairs.

He was a lucky bastard. He really didn't deserve her. But he was going to try his damndest to earn back every part of her that had lost.

* * *

AN: Reviews much appreciated yo! I'm secretly gangsta, but no not really. My friend Laura claims I have a ghetto booty though. Can you tell that it's late as I'm writing this?


	12. Change of Seasons

_You want love, but you fear it._

_Your attention's been shifted._

_You summed up the feeling with a simple dismissing._

_What you gonna do?_

_Deceiving, it ain't you, believe it._

_Cause our love, ain't easy it changes with seasons._

* * *

He didn't know where to start. She'd given him about a month to prove himself; to prove that they were really meant for each other. And while he'd had confidence in his plan while he was begging her to let him go through with it, Booth had no idea where to start to actually implement it. He needed someone to bounce ideas off of, and frankly he was tired of Cam's failing advice.

"What do you think, Katie? Should I get her daisies again?"

Booth was currently at the grocery store with the child and they had just passed the floral department.

"No," came Katie's response.

"Well I can't get her roses, right?"

"No."

"Well then, what do you suggest?"

Katie reached her hands out of the cart toward a bunch of purple flowers Booth didn't recognize. He picked up the bouquet and handed it to her.

"Yes!" she squealed, scooping the flowers into her tiny embrace.

"Are you just picking these because they're your favorite color?"

"Yes."

"Well if she doesn't like them, I'm blaming you."

Katie just giggled in response.

"All right, what else do we need?" Booth asked, consulting his list.

"Cheerios!"

"Cheerios? Don't we have a full box of those at home?"

Katie just shrugged.

"I'm pretty sure we just bought you a box. And besides, I told you we're here so I can cook dinner for Brennan, er Mommy. I don't think she'd want Cheerios for dinner."

After Katie had called Brennan "mama" last week, they'd decided it would be best to encourage her to call them Mom and Dad. When she was older, they would tell her about Hodgins and Angela, but for now it was just the two of them.

"But they yummy!"

"Yes, but they're for breakfast."

"No, anytime!"

"Maybe _you_ can get away with that, but not the rest of us. So I was thinking about making something along the lines of pasta. That wouldn't be too hard, right?"

"Why ask me?"

"Because there's nobody else here to ask, silly."

"There's lady," Katie said, pointing to a store employee, who was stocking the shelves.

"Hmm… I'd still rather talk to you."

She laughed, running her hands over the flowers in her lap.

"Careful with those, sweetie. There still needs to be petals on them for when I give them to your mom. I can't just give her the stems, now can I?"

"No," Katie laughed.

"That's what I thought."

As Booth began gathering the various supplies for this dinner, he couldn't help but pray that this would work. There's no way he could share Katie with Brennan the way he shared Parker with Rebecca. It was hard enough only seeing his son every other weekend. He couldn't imagine having that same relationship with his daughter, even if she really wasn't his. She was his now and that was all that mattered.

But this was about more than that. This was about Brennan. He couldn't lose her. Not ever again. For years she had been his best friend, his rock, and his partner. And after their year of fighting, he wanted more than anything to get all of that back. He wanted that girl who would rather drink beer than eat ice cream after a tough case. He wanted that girl who would race him to their coffee cart and then try to use logic to explain her losing. But most of all, he wanted that girl who would lay her head on his shoulder when she was upset and just let him hold her. Booth was ready to be that guy again, he just needed his girl.

* * *

"You're home late," was the first line out of Brennan's mouth when Booth walked though the front door with Katie and his dinner supplies.

"Sorry, I went to the grocery store with Katie. My phone was on; you could have called me."

Brennan just shrugged, moving to take Katie from him. Booth pulled the purple flowers Katie had picked out from his bag.

"We picked these out for you. Well Katie did, but I decided that she was right."

"Purple!" Katie squealed from Brennan's arms.

"Perhaps she wanted them for herself," Brennan quipped, smiling down at her.

"Maybe… say do you know what type of flowers these are? We couldn't figure it out."

"I don't know. Let me consult my giant encyclopedia of botany."

"Still haven't found a botanist, huh?"

Brennan groaned. "Cam's interviewing one tomorrow. I swear if she doesn't hire him…"

"I'm sure he's plenty qualified."

"Nobody's qualified. That's the problem."

"There has to be someone. Not everybody can be terrible."

"You'd be surprised," Brennan mumbled, heading into the kitchen.

Booth followed, carrying his bags of groceries and the flowers. He put the flowers in a vase and then began unpacking the plastic sacks.

"What's all of that?" Brennan asked, gesturing over her shoulder at all of the food while she put Katie into her highchair.

"I'm making you dinner," Booth replied with a shrug.

"Booth –"

"No, come on. Let me do it. I want to."

Brennan sighed. "Fine. Is it something you can feed her too, or do I have to make her dinner?"

"It's pasta. She'll eat it."

She nodded, grabbing the vase of flowers and placing them in the center of the dining room table. Then she went to get Katie her coloring notebook and crayons. The child couldn't draw much yet, but she sure did enjoy scribbling various colors. Maybe she had an artist in her after all. With Katie content, Brennan picked up the newspaper and sat down at the table.

"Have you found a cause of death yet?" Booth asked casually, as he started boiling the water for the pasta.

"If I had, I would have told you," Brennan responded annoyed, without looking up from the paper.

"Bones, it's been almost a week. You never take this long."

"Don't you think I know that?"

"Yes, you're yourselves toughest critic. I was just making conversation."

"It sounded like you were judging me."

"I wasn't. I swear."

Brennan sighed. "I'm about ready to rule it an air embolism or drowning or something else that wouldn't leave any trace on the bones. Fischer and I can't find anything. Dr. Wessland found some blow flies, so we have time of death, but I already told you that two days ago. And I suppose the blow flies rule out drowning…"

"Any particulates?"

"Yes, I just can't identify them, which is why we _really_ need a botanist."

Booth, thankfully, let her read the paper in silence after that. Dinner was eventually ready and he served it up to all three of them. They ate in silence for a few minutes, before Booth spoke up again.

"Do you still write?"

"Of course I do."

"Kathy and Andy?"

"…Yes."

Booth nodded, taking a sip of his wine.

"Why?" Brennan asked, when he didn't press any further.

"Well it's just you haven't published anything in a while and I haven't seen you writing anything since we moved in together."

"Forgive me for going through a major life crisis."

"I didn't mean it like that."

"For your information, the final book of the series is with my editor right now."

"Final book? You're ending it?"

"It's kind of hard to write Andy, when you think he's never going to speak to you again. I thought we were over, so I made it over for them," Brennan shrugged.

"You broke them up?"

"Read it and find out."

"But I normally get the first copy!" he complained.

"Editor, Booth, not publisher. It's not readable yet."

"Well now that we're getting back to being okay, will you continue it?"

Brennan shook her head. "Not with the way I ended it, I can't."

"It hasn't been published. You have time to fix it."

"I don't want to fix it. It's a good ending to their story. If you're worried about their story being some sort of symbolic parallel to ours, don't. Just because Kathy and Andy's story ended doesn't mean that ours has to."

This seemed to put Booth at ease and they both went back to eating.

"But what are you going to write now?" he asked a few minutes later.

"More Kathy Reichs books."

"But I thought you just said…you did break them up!"

"No…I just killed him off."

"You killed me off?"

"I was mad at you."

Booth scoffed. "Remind me to never get on your bad side again. You might actually end up killing me. And you could get away with it too with that perfect murder plan of yours."

"This is very true."

He couldn't help but laugh at her.

"What?" she asked.

"Nothing. It's just you're so very…you."

"Thank you…I think."

"Why don't I clean this up, while you give Katie a bath and put her to bed, and then we can see if there's anything decent on TV?"

"Sounds like a plan," Brennan smiled, picking Katie up out of her highchair. "Come on little one, let's get you cleaned up."

Booth watched as she ascended the stairs. For a woman who used to never want children, she made a pretty great mom.

* * *

They were sitting on the couch in uncomfortable silence. Brennan kept crossing and uncrossing her legs, simply trying to find a comfortable position. It was clearly bothering Booth, however, because she could feel his eyes on her legs. Eventually she felt the weight of his hand pressing into her knee. She dragged her gaze away from the TV to meet his eyes.

"Sorry," she apologized softly.

But Booth didn't move his hand. Instead he dragged it up her thigh, his thumb brushing her leg on its way back down to her knee. Brennan could feel the goosebumps forming through the material of her jeans. He did it again, this time dragging his hand up higher. She drew in a sharp breath as she felt the throbbing begin between her legs. On his next drag, he went up all of the way pressing the seam of her jeans into her. At that, her eyes fluttered closed and a small moan escaped her lips, but she forced herself not to let him have her yet. She was still mad at him after all.

"Our relationship has to be based on more than sex, you know," Brennan stated without opening her eyes.

"Look who's talking."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"You used to believe that relationships were purely sex; simply carnal and nothing more."

Her eyes flew open and locked back onto his.

"People change."

Booth didn't respond, simply dragging his index finger beneath the waistband of her pants.

Brennan grabbed his wrist. "Stop."

He withdrew his hand with a sigh and crossed his arms over his chest.

"So what, you're going to pout now because I won't let you sleep with me again?"

"I'm _trying_, Bones. I'm trying to earn your forgiveness here."

"And I'm trying to forgive you, but it's hard."

They fell back into another uncomfortable silence. The TV was busy advertising a new romantic comedy coming to theaters next month.

"Angela used to make me watch those things with her. I always despised them. Real life just doesn't work that way."

"Not a 'Rom Com' fan?"

"A what?"

"Romantic comedy," Booth explained, feeling slightly embarrassed that he called them that and she didn't. Of course this was Bones, he was talking about here. All these years with her, and her pop culture references were still minimal.

"Oh. Nope."

"Come on. There has to be at least one or two that you like. _I_ even enjoy a couple of them."

"Well, I suppose _When Harry Met Sally_ wasn't _all_ bad."

Booth smirked. "Do you agree with its basic premise?"

"What, that a man and a woman can't be 'just friends?' I was 'just friends' with Hodgins."

"Yeah but, Hodgins didn't know your deepest, darkest secrets. I do."

"We're…just friends."

"Bullshit."

"Well we were for six years."

"But it can't be that way anymore. Things have changed between us."

"You're right. I don't trust you anymore."

"It was one mistake! I get why you're mad, I do, but you can't really plan on holding this over me forever."

"I don't intend to. You just have to give me time, Booth."

"So on March 15, we're magically going to be okay again? I thought you needed me to convince you that we are meant to be or something."

"I don't know, okay? I just need time…and space. I know it's been a few years since this whole Hannah thing. I know that I need to just let it go. But I don't trust that easily; I don't _fall in love _that easily. You know that. I just need time to be okay with it, to accept the fact that you were trying to hurt me, but you're sorry. Forgiveness will come because let's face it, it's us. I may not believe in fate the way you do, but you and I…we were always going to end up together. I've known it for years. I've just been afraid of it."

"So that night outside of Sweet's office when I said that I've known since the beginning, you knew too?"

"I didn't know right from the beginning. I hated you right at the beginning. I told you the other day that I knew I had feelings for you when you were shot. It was within that following year that I started to realize that eventually we would happen."

"So then –"

"Stop. Right there. We've had this argument dozens of times before. I'm not getting into it again."

"Relax. That isn't where I was going."

"Oh," Brennan said, visibly relaxing. "Well then, go on."

"Thank you. So then if you know we're going to end up together, why are you fighting it?"

Brennan looked over at him and then reached for his hand, lacing her fingers in between his.

"What are you doing?" Booth asked.

"I'm trying to stop fighting it," Brennan said, giving him a half-smile.

Booth smiled back as Brennan returned her attention to the television. _Maybe_, he thought_, just maybe, winning her back won't be as hard as I thought it would be._

* * *

"Dr. Brennan, I'd like you to meet our new botanist, Dr. Thomas Ross," Cam said proudly, as Brennan entered the Jeffersonian the next morning.

"Dr. Brennan, the pleasure is all mine," Ross said, shaking her hand. "Oh and I've identified the particulates. This man was killed in the north end of West Virginia and later transported to D.C. He was found here, correct?"

"Yes, he was," Brennan nodded, giving him the once over. "I approve."

"I'm honored. I know all about your work here at the Jeffersonian and I intend to live up to the expectations."

"Glad to hear it."

Brennan turned to go to her office. Cam followed right behind her.

"Here to badger me about my relationship with Booth again?" Brennan asked once they were in her office.

"Uh, no. I wanted to tell you about Dr. Ross and his credentials."

"Oh, well go ahead then."

"Okay first of all, he has a minor in entomology, so I was hoping he could help out where Dr. Wessland is lacking."

"That's a good start," Brennan commented. "Where did he study?"

"Stanford. And he earned his doctorate at Oxford."

"Excellent. What was he doing before this?"

"He held an assistant teaching position at Oxford, while helping with ongoing investigations. He said he came back to the States because he missed it too much."

Brennan nodded, taking in this information. "Do you know his case closure rate?"

"Not exactly, but from his stories about some of the cases he was working on, I'd say it's pretty high."

"He sounds promising. Well done, Cam."

"Thank you. Dr. Ross may not be Hodgins, but he's pretty damn close."

"No one will ever be Hodgins, that much is clear. But like I said, he sounds promising."

Cam nodded. "Oh and Fischer found something on one of the bones he wants you to take a look at."

"Is it the cause of death?"

"He's not sure. That's why he wants you to look at it."

"Okay, tell him I'll be there in a minute."

"Will do," Cam agreed, leaving Brennan's office.

Brennan glanced around her office, reminiscing about her old team. Dr. Goodman, Zach, Hodgins, Angela…they were all gone. She had been so sure all of those of years ago that this team would be hers until the day that she retired. And now, every single of one of them had been replaced. She liked Cam and the squinterns, and Sweets had ended up being a nice addition to the team. Dr. Ross seemed like someone she could grow to like, but she doubted that Annah and Dr. Wessland would ever get to that point. At the end of the day, she and Booth were all that were left of that original dynamic team, and no matter how hard she tried, she would never get over that fact.

* * *

"Agent Booth, can I talk to you for a second?" Sweets asked, popping his head into Booth's office.

"You're not here to pester me about my relationship with Brennan again, are you?"

"No, no nothing like that."

"Then sure, Sweets, come on in," Booth told him, gesturing to the chair in front of his desk. "What's on your mind?"

"It's about my wedding to Daisy. I have a favor to ask you –"

"Wedding stuff? Seriously, Sweets? Do I look like the kind of guy who knows about wedding stuff? I've proposed twice and was turned down both times. So if you're looking for advice on color schemes –"

"Actually, I was hoping that you would be my best man."

"Whoa, whoa, back up. Me? Your best man?"

"Well yeah. I don't have any brothers and I've really lost touch with my friends from school, so you're the obvious choice. I know you may not always see us as friends, but –"

"Hey. We're friends. I may find you annoying sometimes, but we're friends. We've been through a lot together, you and me. And frankly, the team just wouldn't be the same without you."

"So, you'll do it?"

"I'd be honored."

"Awesome! Thanks Agent Booth!"

"Sweets, I uh, I think it's about time you drop the 'agent' and just call me Booth, all right?"

"Right, yeah, I can do that. Hey, do you think that means I can just call Dr. Brennan, 'Brennan' now?"

"Definitely not."

"Why not? I've known her just as long as I've known you."

"Yes, but Bones…she's very particular about names and titles and what not. If she wanted you to drop the 'doctor' she would have told you by now."

"You never got her permission to call her Bones," Sweets protested.

"Well yes, but she and I are different, you know? We've been that way since we met. And yes, she used to hate it when I called her Bones, but now she hates it when I don't. My nickname for her…it's ours. And the only people who called her Bren or Brennan are dead now."

"She lets Cam call her that now."

"I don't know then, Sweets. Try calling her Brennan and see what happens. But don't come crying to your best man when she bites your head off."

"How _is_ that going, by the way?"

"Hey now, you said you weren't here to discuss this."

"Originally, I wasn't. But since you brought her up…"

"Things are still complicated. That's about all you're going to get out of me at this point."

"Fair enough. Hey, thanks again, Booth. You being my best man really means a lot to me."

"I'm glad I could help, Sweets. I really am."

* * *

AN: So I was sort of channeling Michelle Tanner from Full House, so Katie is probably talking way more than someone her age would…my bad. Reviews warm my heart. You know what to do. *wink, wink.*


	13. Slow Me Down

_My head and my heart are colliding chaotic. _

_Pace of the world I just wish I could stop it._

_Try to appear like I've got it together, I'm falling apart._

_Save me, somebody take my hand and lead me. _

_Slow me down, don't let love pass me by just show me how cause I'm ready to fall._

_Slow me down; don't let me live a lie._

_Before my life flies by, I need you to slow me down._

* * *

February turned to March in no time, and before he knew it, it was March 15: judgment day. Brennan had continued to act bipolar towards him over the past few weeks which made Booth severely confused about the extent of his progress. One minute things would be perfect between them and the next she would be biting his head off. It was clear that she was still struggling with all of this, but Booth couldn't figure out why. Either she wanted to be with him or she didn't. The choice should be easy.

"Quick, go clean up the living room while I clean up the kitchen," Brennan said in a rush, as she passed by Booth's bedroom.

"Why? What's going on?" Booth asked, pushing himself off of his bed.

"Mindy Johnson is here!"

"Oh no, anybody but Mindy Johnson!" Booth exclaimed in mock horror.

"You don't remember who she is, do you?" Brennan asked, scooping a stuffed rabbit up from the hallway floor.

"Can't say that I do."

"Katie's case worker."

"With ACS? What the hell is she doing here?"

"Surprise check up. Now help me clean!"

"Bones, if she's already here –"

"Shut up and help!"

Figuring arguing was useless at this point, Booth threw on the closest shirt and headed downstairs. He had just reached the disaster area that had become their living room, when the doorbell rang.

"Bones! She's here!"

He heard a stifled 'shit' in response, followed by her footsteps pounding down the stairs. She handed Katie off to him and proceeded to throw miscellaneous items into the coat closet.

"Okay, I'm going to answer the door now," Booth warned her, pulling on the handle.

The petite redhead smiled back at him, pushing a stray curl behind her ear. "Hello Agent Booth, Katie." She nodded in the child's direction. "May I come in?"

Booth glanced over his shoulder for Brennan. She was oddly absent from his peripheral vision and the living room now appeared to be relatively clean.

"Uh, yes, come on in," Booth told her.

Mindy did and immediately made her way to the couch and took a seat. "Where is Dr. Brennan?" she asked, looking around. "She is still residing here with you, correct?"

"Yeah, yes she is. She was just here a minute ago. Bones? Mindy Johnson is here!"

"Bones?" Mindy inquired, tapping her pen to her chin.

"Ah yeah…she works with bones for a living and I gave her that nickname years ago and it just sort of stuck."

Brennan walked in from the kitchen reminding Booth oddly of a Stepford Wife. Her hair, which had been disheveled mere minutes ago, appeared to be without flaw and she was carrying a pitcher of lemonade. He couldn't help but cock his head at her.

"Ms. Johnson, I wasn't expecting to you see you today," Brennan said, with what Booth knew to be her fake smile.

"That's the fun of surprise visits," Mindy responded. "Is that lemonade?"

Brennan poured them all glasses and then took a seat next to Booth and Katie.

"So," Mindy started, taking a long sip of her sweet drink. "How are things going here?"

Booth and Brennan looked at each other.

"Fine," they said in unison.

"And Katie has taken well to you, I hope?"

"Sure has," Booth answered. "She's even started calling us 'Mom' and 'Dad.'"

"What about the two of you, are you still fighting?"

"No," Brennan said at the same time Booth answered, "It's complicated."

Brennan shot him a look and he shrugged apologetically.

"Interesting," Mindy mumbled, writing something down in her notebook.

"What are you writing?" Brennan asked, trying to take a look.

"Oh just some notes to help me with my final decision."

"Final decision about what?" Booth asked.

"If you two are fit parents for Katie."

"You can't take her away from us, she's ours!" Brennan exclaimed.

"Dr. Brennan, calm down. No one said I was taking her away from you yet."

"Yet?"

Booth put his hand on her back to try and reassure her, but Brennan simply shrugged it off with a huff.

"You….you…" Brennan stammered. "Yes, Booth and I have our issues, our fights, but what couple doesn't? We're working on it; that's the best we can do. But that doesn't stop us from being great parents to Katie. She loves us just as much as we love her and to take her away from us would just be cruel. She's already lost one set of parents, don't make her lose another."

"Dr. Brennan," Mindy started, gently. "I recall you saying that you were once in foster care. What circumstances put you there?"

"That is none of your damn business."

"Were you by any chance taken away from your parents because they were fighting too much, perhaps physically?"

"No," Brennan said flatly. "You're not even close."

"Listen, Ms. Johnson," Booth butted in. "Bones is extremely protective when it comes to family, even though she often doesn't realize she's doing it. Katie here is the only thing she has left of her best friends, and her parents…they were good people. It _is_ none of your business as to how she ended up in foster care; your main concern here is Katie not Dr. Brennan."

"But –," Mindy started.

"I'm not finished," Booth cut her off. "When I first met this woman, she didn't want to be a mother. She didn't want kids. A couple of years ago she finally changed her mind, but she never found the right guy to be the father. And then Angela and Hodgins had Katie. As her godparents, I've watched Brennan care for and nurture this little girl every chance she got. And now…she is a really great mom."

"Thank you," Brennan whispered, stroking Katie's tiny ponytail.

"I'm sorry; I gave off the wrong impression. I have no intention of taking Katie away from you two, nor would I want to. It's my job to make these check up visits and take notes. Sadly, it is very normal for me to remove the child from the home because I usually get handed child abuse cases. You three are doing just fine."

"So we passed?" Booth asked.

"With flying colors. I see nothing wrong with this household. However, you can expect another surprise visit within the next three months. It's mandatory, so don't worry you did nothing wrong," Mindy told them, getting to her feet. "Excellent lemonade by the way."

"Thank you," Brennan answered softly.

Booth placed Katie in her playpen and walked Mindy to the door. Once she was gone, he came to the living room and collapsed back down onto the couch.

"I've always hated social workers," Brennan said through gritted teeth.

"They're just trying to help."

She scoffed. "You haven't dealt with them as much as I have. When I told my social worker that I had been locked in the trunk of a car for two days, she didn't believe me. She just couldn't understand the fact that every family she put me in… At least you had Pops."

"Yeah, I thank God for him every day."

"Booth –"

She was cut off by his ringing cell phone.

"Hold that thought. Agent Booth. He did what? You can't be serious. Yeah, okay, fine. I'll be right there."

"What's wrong?" Brennan asked.

"Tony? Our main suspect? He just strapped a bomb to his chest and walked into his office building. The hostage negotiations unit says he only wants to talk to me. I gotta head down there."

"I'll come with you."

"No, Bones, this is dangerous. Stay here with Katie."

"I'm your _partner_. I'm coming. We'll get the neighbors to watch Katie."

"And what happens if the bomb goes off, and we both die? She is going to end up in the one place you do not want her going."

"We survive near death situations all of the time."

"We have a kid now, Bones. We have to think about her needs more than we need to consider your need for excitement and adventure."

"So what, I'm not allowed to go into the field anymore?"

"I didn't say that."

"Then I'm coming."

"Bones –"

"We're a _team_, Booth. That means we have each other's backs. I'm not letting you do this alone. And you know just as well as I do how stubborn I can be."

He groaned, scrubbing a hand over his face. "Fine, but you're staying outside of the building. Take it or leave it."

"I'll go call the neighbors."

* * *

The scene was mad chaos when they arrived. The police had barricaded off the building and curious onlookers were crowded around. Booth flashed his badge and made it passed the barricade with Brennan right behind him.

"Special Agent Seeley Booth," he said, extending his hand to the negotiations officer. "And this is my partner, Dr. Temperance Brennan."

"The anthropologist?" the officer asked. "We don't need her here."

"She's just here for more moral support, anyway," Booth said patting her on the back. Brennan groaned. "So what have we got here?"

"Well thankfully, the building only has two floors. We tried to evacuate them, but the suspect is refusing. He says the only person he'll talk to is you."

"So what I am doing here? Calling him or heading in there?"

"He wants you to go in there and talk to him face to face, but we'd prefer it if you'd just call him."

"I'll go in."

"Booth, don't be crazy," Brennan told him. "He wants you in there so he can blow the building up with you in it."

"I know his type, Bones. He's not like that. I'm just going to go in and talk some sense into him, and we'll all come out of this unscathed."

"But –"

"Okay, Bones wait here," he told her.

"Come on, Booth."

"No, we had a deal remember? I told you that you could come if you stayed outside where it's safe."

"No, it's not about that. I don't want you going in there."

"You've just got to trust me on this one. I know what I'm doing."

Brennan sighed reluctantly knowing that he too was stubborn and wouldn't back down easily. "Fine. Just be careful, okay?"

"I always am," he smiled.

She watched his backside as he disappeared into the building. She knew he was right. Now that they had Katie, they couldn't both be risking their lives on a daily basis, but that didn't stop her from missing the thrill of it all. It also didn't stop her from worrying about him. She usually didn't "listen" to her internal organs, but her gut was telling her that him going into that building was a bad idea.

And then it happened. The sound of metal hitting metal as the bomb ripped apart the building from the inside out.

* * *

Her breath caught in her throat as she watched the scene in front of her unfold. The building that Booth had just entered mere minutes ago was collapsing in on itself. The explosion had left her ears ringing and she could feel the debris pelting her skin. The blast had thrown her to the ground and she struggled to push herself up with, what was more than likely, her broken left arm.

"This isn't happening," she mumbled to herself. There was no way she could handle losing him too, no matter how pissed she was at it him right now.

"Booth!" her scream ripped from her throat, but was muffled by the scene of chaos that surrounded her. Sirens wailed in the distance and onlookers screamed and ran in panic.

Brennan brought herself to her feet with great effort. She ached all over and no doubt had a cracked rib or two. She stared at the wreckage trying to determine the best way to get into it. There had to be something that she could do. There had to be something she could do to save him unless…_no_. She scolded herself for even thinking it.

As she began to make her way over to the collapsed building, the paramedics arrived.

"Ma'am!" One of them was addressing her. She ignored him. Her injuries could wait, and she feared that Booth, however, could not.

Brennan realized then, that she hadn't really thought this thing through. Her job in these types of situations was to identify the remains that were brought to her; she had never gone searching through the wreckage herself. And yet that didn't stop her from hurling chunks of drywall out of her way with her good arm.

"Come on, Booth," she whispered. "Where are you?"

The paramedic from earlier approached her. "Ma'am, I need to check you out."

"I'm fine. Bones heal. Massive head trauma, on the other hand, does not," Brennan said flatly, continuing to toss drywall haphazardly around her.

"Ma'am, if you have a loved one who was in the building at the time, search and rescue will –"

"No, no, no, see you don't understand. This man, he's…he's my partner. He was the one to pull me out of the ground after I was buried alive. He was the one to save me when that psychopath was either about to stab me with a knife or sick his dogs on me. He was the one who came rushing all the way to New Orleans when he found out I had been attacked. I _owe it him_, to be the one who saves him."

Some shuffling in the wreckage caught her eye, and Brennan immediately ran to it and began digging. The paramedic appeared at her side again, but this time he was actually helping her dig instead of pestering her about her injuries. A hand clamped onto her wrist, but her moment of joy deflated when she noticed the wedding ring. It wasn't him.

She allowed the paramedic to finish the digging as she stood up to survey the scene once again. Where the hell was he? She tried to think back to her archeology training. This was sort of like that, wasn't it? But she hadn't been in a situation that required her to think like this in years, not since Maluku. And that's when she saw it, a flash of color. It was a pattern so crazy it could only be one thing: Booth's sock.

Brennan ran towards it, ignoring the jolt of pain that shot through her ankle. Yet another injury she hadn't even noticed. She knelt down next to the color and began to dig frantically with both arms, despite the wave of pain radiating from her left arm. She could feel tears running down her cheeks and she wasn't sure if they were from the pain or because of Booth.

_Please be alive_, Brennan silently begged as she uncovered his limp body. Sure enough, it was him. The first thing she did, after checking for a pulse, was examine his head for signs of trauma. When all she found were scraps and bruises, she proceeded to gently shake him in an effort to wake up him.

"Come on, Booth, wake up. Please. Do it for me…and Katie. Please Booth, we need you."

She couldn't bear to think about what would happen to Katie if he didn't make it through this; or even worse, what would happen to _her_.

"Wake up!" she practically screamed in his face. Her hot tears felt like they were burning her face as they ran off of her cheeks and onto his. "Please, Booth. Look I'm sorry, okay? I've been overacting. I…I…I'm in love with you. There, I said it. I love you."

Brennan looked up, frantically searching for the paramedic from earlier. He was gone. The whole scene was still buzzing with panic and chaos. No one seemed to be listening as she called out, "Can we get some help over here?"

She felt torn between needing to stay with him and needing to go find someone to help him. She struggled to stand up again, but apparently running over here on her bad ankle hadn't been the best idea. Brennan immediately fell on top of Booth after trying to put her full weight on it. Her eyes widened, as she was positive she had heard him grunt after she landed on him.

"Booth?" she asked tentatively. "Can you hear me?"

He mumbled something incoherent in response. Brennan closed her eyes as relief washed over her. When she opened her eyes, she began rubbing his cheek with the pad of her thumb as she watched him come to. His eyes slowly began to open and adjust to his surroundings.

"What happened?" he asked, groggily.

"I'm not entirely sure. There was an explosion…"

"Katie?"

"She wasn't with us," Brennan said, shaking her head.

"Why are you on top of me?"

"I fell," Brennan blushed, moving into a seated position by his side.

Booth slowly tried to sit up, groaning as his head throbbed in the process. "I feel like I've been hit by a truck."

"It was a building, actually," she said softly.

He looked over at her. She looked pretty banged up herself. She was cradling her left arm to her chest in a way that made it look like she was hugging herself. Her face was covered in soot, save for the lines on her cheeks that her tears had left behind. Blood trickled down the side of her chin from a cut on her lip. And to top it all off, she still looked positively terrified.

"Bones, you're shaking," he told her, watching her shoulders and hands tremble.

"I…I thought…I thought that you…"

"Hey, shhh I'm okay. You're okay. We're okay," Booth soothed, scooting over to her to wrap her in his arms.

"Booth, you should really be laying down. I don't want you over-exerting yourself. You could have a concussion or –"

"I'll be fine, Bones."

She sighed and allowed her head to fall onto his shoulder.

"The building," Booth started, looking around him. "With our suspect…he set the bomb off after I entered didn't he?"

He felt Brennan nod against his shoulder.

"Huh, guess you were right after all."

"For once, I didn't want to be right."

He placed a soft kiss on the crown of her head.

"So, uh does this near-death experience finally mean I'm fully forgiven and that you're ready to be with me?" Booth asked hopefully.

"No…yes. But only because in those minutes when I thought you were gone…" Brennan trailed off, choking on a small sob. "I can't lose you too, Booth. _I can't_. Without you I have no one."

"That's not true and you know it."

"Isn't it? Yes, I have Katie, but losing you means I have to raise her alone and I'm starting to realize that I couldn't do that. She needs a father."

"What about your family? And the team?"

"Honestly, I haven't spoken to my family since the holidays. After everything that happened in our past, we're just…not close. And the team? They're friends, some of them just acquaintances. They're not…" she trailed off again looking down at her lap.

"Hey. Look at me," Booth told her.

Brennan lifted her head so she was looking into his eyes.

"I'm not going anywhere."

"You could have died just now –"

"Weren't you just saying like an hour ago that we survive near death experiences all of the time? We're indestructible, baby!"

"Yes, but that was before…"

"Before what?"

"Before I realized just how much I love you."

From the way he was looking at her, Brennan deduced that Booth must have been unconscious when she'd said that earlier. Right now he looked very…

"Hey, you two need to come with me and get checked out!" the medic from earlier yelled, jogging over to them. He instantly recognized Brennan. "Oh good, you found your partner."

"I, uh, yeah," Brennan said, looking back over at him. He was staring at her very oddly. "What?"

"You've never said that to me before and actually sounded like you meant it."

"Well…I meant it."

"Took you long enough," Booth said with a smirk.

Brennan returned his smile. "You should just be glad that I said it at all."

"Trust me, Bones, I'm _very_ glad."

* * *

AN: I totally wrote this chapter during Spring Break while I was in Mexico. It is very random. Sorry about that… Also feel like everything here was very rushed…meh. I don't like it...


	14. Like Lovers Do

_I can hear you thinking what I feel._

_I know that what we've got is real. _

_And all we need to get us through is just to live like lovers do._

_Just like lovers do._

_I wanna feel that way, yeah like lovers do._

_They lose themselves for days. _

* * *

It was very difficult to care for a child when both parents were on crutches. Thankfully Brennan had only sprained her ankle, opposed to Booth's broken fibula, so she was able to get off of hers sooner. Of course there was also the matter of Brennan's fractured ulna. Needless to say, Cam and Sweets had been extremely helpful this past month.

Booth had been very fortunate. Besides the leg injury and various cuts and bruises, he only suffered from a few bruised ribs and a mild concussion. Things could have been much, much worse.

Brennan was sitting in the living room watching Katie bat her ball around the room again, when Booth hobbled in on his crutches.

"Hold it, right there," he told her, catching her trying to take off her wrist brace.

"What? I just want to check on its healing progress," Brennan said, shrugging her shoulders.

"You're not a medical doctor."

"Well no, but my doctorate is in bones, is it not?"

"No, it's not. It's in Forensic Anthropology."

"You say tomato, I say…"

"Bones…"

"See? It's even my nickname."

"Okay yes, but you have these things called skin and muscle which are in your way of your precious bones."

"I could –"

"No."

"But –"

"The doctor told you not to take it off. You of all people should know better."

"I'll put it right back on," Brennan protested.

"Can you even tell how much it's healed without looking at an X-ray?"

Brennan paused, staring at her right wrist as she clenched and stretched her fingers. "…I doubt it."

"So then?"

"I'm just sick of wearing this stupid thing!"

"You think I like wearing this?" Booth asked, lowering himself down onto the couch and waving his booted foot in the air.

"I know how long bones take to heal. My fracture should be healed by now."

"Maybe you need more calcium in your diet," he suggested as a smile formed on his face.

"My calcium in take is just fine, thank you very much."

"Apparently your bones say otherwise, and bones never lie," Booth quoted as his smile transformed into more of a smirk.

"Now you're just mocking me."

"I would never," he told her, leaning in for a quick kiss.

"Hmmm," Brennan hummed against his lips.

Booth pulled away, resting his forehead against hers. "So, now that we're a couple. I think there are a few things that we need to clear up."

"Like what?" she asked, glancing over at Katie to make sure she hadn't wandered away like previous times. She was still there, now attempting to build a tower of blocks.

"You know, you're probably the first girlfriend I've had who hasn't called me Seeley," he told her, leaning back against the couch with his hands folded behind his head.

"I can if you want me to," Brennan shrugged.

"God, no. You're not _Camille_, or Rebecca, or even Hannah."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes. And besides, if you called me Seeley, I'd have to call you Temperance."

"Please don't do that. Nobody calls me Temperance, not even my family."

"Tempe?"

"Don't call me that," Brennan said, shaking her head.

"So when I introduce you to people, I should say 'This is my girlfriend, Bones.'?"

"Well no, then you can use my name: Dr. Temperance Brennan."

"Is the doctor part really necessary?"

"It's part of my name!"

"Fine. Then you can introduce me as Special Agent Seeley Booth."

"That's kind of a mouthful."

"Hey, you get to use your title, I want to use mine."

"But my title is a single word. Yours is two." Brennan threw him a look that said 'I'm not arguing with you about this anymore.'

Booth sighed. "Okay, okay we'll just address this later when it becomes an issue. So, next order of business, our apartments."

"What about them?"

"We're still paying for them. We live here now."

"Well, yes, but –"

"Bones, we're in this together now: you and me and Katie. We can't keep holding on to our pasts and I for one, can't afford to. I'm going to sell my apartment, and I think that you should do the same."

"But what if this doesn't work out after all?" Brennan asked softly, looking down at her lap.

"What, you can't see us being together for the rest of our lives?"

"Nobody can predict the future, Booth."

"Well _I _can. And you know what I see for us? Kids of our own – siblings for Katie, summers spent having picnics and going to the lake, Christmases with the whole family, us – old and wrinkled and grey – living in this house where we watched our kids grow up… I see a future _with you_."

"Booth –"

"Do you love me?"

"You know that I do," Brennan sighed.

"Then sell your apartment. You don't need it anymore."

She looked into his eyes. "Okay."

"Just like that? No more arguing about it?"

"I'm sick of fighting with you; sick of fighting us. If this is what you want, I'll sell my apartment."

"I want _you_ to want it."

Brennan laced her fingers in between his, allowing her thumb to rub small circles on his hand. "I want you. And if this is what I need to do to prove to you that I'm serious, then I want it."

Booth leaned in, cupping her face with his other hand, and kissed her. He drew her lower lip into his mouth, allowing her to deepen the kiss. She reached up with her other hand, combing her fingers through his short hair. He pulled away, kissed her nose, and then started in on her neck. Brennan pulled him closer to her as a moan escaped her lips. Booth was slipping his hands up her shirt when the sound of Katie crying, pulled him away. They both sighed in unison.

"To be continued," Booth whispered into her ear, before crawling down on the floor to see what was bothering Katie.

"How do you plan on getting up from the floor with that boot on your foot?" Brennan asked, nearly out of breath.

"Wasn't really thinking about that, when I got down here," Booth confessed. "So Miss Katie, what seems to be the problem here?"

"Owie!" Katie cried, pointing to her fallen blocks.

"Oh sweetie, did your tower fall over on top of you?"

She nodded.

"Oh no. Where does it hurt?"

"Here," Katie said, touching her forehead.

"Well come over here, and I'll make it better."

She walked over to him and Booth kissed the spot on her head she had pointed out.

"Feel better?"

She sniffed and nodded, before wandering back over to the comfort of her circus ball.

"Nicely played," Brennan smiled offering him her arm without the wrist brace on it.

"Thank you. You know I really don't think you're going to be able to pull me up with one arm. You're just going to end up on the ground on top of me. And we already came close to traumatizing our daughter for life once today, so…"

"Fine, then get up on your own," Brennan told him, moving back over to the couch.

She watched as he crawled over to the couch and used the cushions to push his way back up onto the piece of furniture. He turned to her with a smug look on his face.

"Such nice arms," she mused, dragging her fingers over his bicep.

"Yeah, yeah," he laughed, batting her hand away. "Hey, there was one more order of business I wanted to discuss with you."

"And that is?"

"The Easter Bunny."

"Oh, no. No. This is where I draw the line. Santa Claus is one thing, but the Easter Bunny is an entirely different matter."

"Come on, Easter is just around the corner! We can hide little plastic eggs full of jellybeans and chocolate…"

"No."

"Do you want her to have a normal childhood?"

"Allowing her to believe in a rabbit that lays chocolate eggs on a Christian holiday dedicated to Jesus magically rising from the dead hardly sounds normal to me."

"So what'd you do on Easter when you were a kid?"

Brennan sighed. "I was forced into these fluffy floral dresses and dragged to church. And after that I was encouraged to find more of the candy-filled eggs hidden in our backyard than Russ."

"So then…"

"My childhood was far from normal, Booth."

"No, your childhood _was_ normal. It's your teen years that weren't."

"Okay, compromise. We can hide eggs, but they're from us, not the Easter Bunny."

"I suppose I'd be okay with that."

"You suppose?" Brennan asked, raising her eyebrows.

"Well half of the fun is the excitement of the Easter Bunny."

"He's just another tool like Santa used to make children behave. Apparently winter to winter is too long of a gap, so someone decided a springtime mythical creature needed to be created as well."

"But it's not like he brings children coal when they've been bad."

"So what does he do instead?"

"I don't actually know…"

"Booth…"

"Okay fine, no bunny, just chocolate eggs. Deal."

Brennan sighed with content and allowed her head to fall onto his shoulder.

"You know, I was thinking about planting some flowers out front. Brighten up the yard now that it's April," she told him.

"Feel free. It is our one and only house now you know."

"So I've heard."

"I know we've been living together for months now, but finally being a couple and finally deciding to sell our apartments, it feels like we're living together for the first time. It finally feels real," Booth said trailing his fingers up and down her arm.

Brennan turned her head to kiss his neck. "You know what would make it feel even more real?"

"What?"

"Us moving into the same room and turning your room back into the guest bedroom."

"How come I'm the one who has to move rooms?"

"Because my room used to be the master bedroom and yours used to be the guest room. You can leave your clothes in there if that's what you're really worried about. I do take up quite a bit of the closet."

Booth wrapped his arms around her, pulling her closer to him. "If it means that I can fall asleep with you in my arms every night, I'll do it."

"What a line," Brennan said rolling her eyes.

"You liked it."

"Or maybe I just like you."

He laughed. "Now who's the one throwing out lines?"

She paused, biting her lower lip, trying to force herself not to laugh as she said, "Did I catch anything?"

Booth burst out laughing harder than before. "You did not. No. You did not just say that."

His laughter proved to be contagious and soon she was laughing just as hard as he was. When they finally calmed down, he put his forehead up against hers, allowing their noses to rub together.

"I've missed this, us," he confessed.

"We've never really had an us like this before."

"Yeah, but…you know what I meant."

She kissed him in response, lingering, before pulling away to look at him.

"I love you, Booth."

"I love you too, Bones."

* * *

AN: Sorry this chapter is so short. It just sort of turned out that way… But hey you know it's actually fluffly which is a nice change of pace and sort of makes up for its length right? Yes? No? Well on Wednesday you get sexytimes again so there.


	15. Make You Feel My Love

_When the evening shadows and the stars appear._

_And there is no one there to dry your tears._

_I could hold you for a million years._

_To make you feel my love. _

* * *

April showers bring May flowers. A simple children's rhyme probably created to help them remember which month came first. She wasn't an expert on where such phrases originated, but she did know that this year that simple phrase had proved to be very true. It had rained a lot in April; so much that a lot almost felt like an understatement. But the weather had let up now that it was May, and the flowers that she had planted were blossoming with abundance. The yard was full of color, and spring, and life.

It reflected how things were going in her own life. Things finally felt normal again. Dr. Ross was proving to be a brilliant botanist and his minor in entomology was certainly helping with what Dr. Wessland lacked. Annah had even become friendlier, leading Brennan to wonder if all she needed was some warm weather. The glaring absence of her friends was still there, would probably always be there, but things were better now, easier.

And things with Booth were finally at a place where they were happy and at peace. If someone had told her that they'd be this way a year ago, she would have laughed in their face. A year ago, she'd lost him forever and hated him with every fiber of her being. Oh how quickly things could change…

Brennan stood in the kitchen, cleaning up after dinner, while Booth put Katie down for bed. She was busy scrubbing down the counter when she heard his footsteps enter the room. Suddenly, he was right behind her, arms on either side of her gripping the counter, pinning her in between him and said counter.

"You know Bones, I've always had this fantasy," he whispered into her ear.

"About me?" she asked softly.

"Yes. Jared was right on Christmas. I just have these moments where I dream about taking you up against a wall and screwing your brains out…metaphorically speaking of course."

Brennan drew in a shaky breath as she felt him harden against her ass. This was certainly a stage of their relationship she had never foreseen them getting to. They'd been acting like horny teenagers lately, and she didn't care one bit.

"You know I've always had this fantasy about you too."

"And what's that?" he asked, kissing her neck.

"You pinning me against a wall and just…devouring…"

She trailed off unable to focus, let alone finish, what she had been saying since Booth's hand was now snaking around her waist and heading south. His hand inched past the waistbands of both her pants and underwear until it was fully cupping her core. His other hand still gripped the counter.

"Booth," she breathed.

"You know I really think we should do something about how turned on we both are right now; maybe live out a fantasy or two while we're at it."

He let his fingers drag across her entrance. He flicked his index finger back and forth a couple of times, finally letting go of the counter to steady her as he felt her knees buckling. Brennan sunk back against him, lacing her arms behind his neck. Booth started peppering kisses down her jaw line and neck, eliciting a moan from her mouth. He used his other hand to unbutton and undo the zipper on her jeans, giving him a better angle. And just as suddenly as he had started, he stopped. He stepped away from her, waiting for her to come to him.

"Damnit, Booth, I was so close!" Brennan panted.

She spun around to find him undressing in the middle of kitchen.

"I know," he teased. "That's why I had to stop."

He pulled off the rest of his clothes, standing completely naked in front of her.

"Seriously you want do this here?" she asked.

"Why not? The kid's asleep upstairs, we both have this fantasy…I never let you finish."

"That is a very wicked grin you have on your face right now," Brennan mumbled, beginning to undress herself as well.

Booth just smirked as he watched her unhook her bra. She stepped over their pile of disheveled clothes and into his embrace. They exchanged lazy, slow kisses before he spun her around and pinned her back to the wall. He went back to kissing her, but this time they were more devouring, and frenzied. The handful of M&Ms she'd had after dinner suddenly became very apparent as his tongue worked on her mouth. His hands were tangled in her hair as one of her legs came up to wrap around his waist. Booth pulled away from her mouth and nipped at her ear, while hoisting her off of the ground so she could wrap her other leg around him as well.

He pushed into her then, smirking at the moan he immediately drew from her. Her arms came to wrap around him, in a sense enveloping his whole body with her own. It was a sharp contrast from the sweet love making they had been doing of late. This time it was primal, hunger fused with desire as he held her to him while taking her breath away.

Brennan's head fell back against the wall, giving Booth a vast amount of open skin to lick, kiss, and suck. His hands gripped her ass, pushing himself in deeper. His name escaped her lips on a moan, her tell that she was about to come. With one final stroke, she did, biting into his shoulder and taking him over the edge with her. Slowly, Brennan untangled herself from him and slouched back against the wall. Booth stood in front of her with his hands splayed out on either side of her head. Their eyes locked.

"Now there's one more thing that I can cross off of my to-do list," he told her on a breathy laugh.

Brennan shook her head, bringing a hand up to cup his jaw. "I wouldn't check that off any list. I think we'll need to do that again."

Booth bent down to recapture her lips in his. Her left hand came up to join her right on his face, as he tenderly kissed her already swollen lips. She eventually pulled away with a smile on her face.

"Explain to me what makes you so different from everybody else," Brennan said softly.

"What do you mean?"

"Sex is just so must better with you."

He smiled. "Remember what I told you a couple of years ago when we had that horse play case? That when you love someone, it's just different. It adds that extra little something that draws the line between crappy sex and whatever that just was that we just did. Face it, Bones, you're just so madly in love with me. You've never felt this way before."

"You're right; I haven't."

Booth kissed her nose. "Neither have I, not this strongly."

"Do you think we're going to last?"

"Why wouldn't we?"

"We fight… a lot."

"We haven't really fought in a while. And besides, fighting is healthy."

"Now you sound like Sweets."

"No, but Bones, I'm serious. It's better that we don't keep things inside or keep secrets anymore. And I already told you last month that I can predict the future and can see us living here together when we're old and grey."

"You can't _really_ predict the future, Booth."

"Well maybe not, but I do know this: you and I were meant to be."

* * *

Booth was enjoying a rather pleasant dream about the woman sleeping next to him when the sound of crying pulled him out of his sleep. Katie.

"It's your turn," he mumbled, gently pushing Brennan.

"No way. I got up last time," she muttered back.

"But I know I got up with her last night. She's at the point where she only wakes up once, if she does at all."

Brennan squinted at the clock. "I was up with her an hour ago. Your turn."

She pulled the covers up to her chin and rolled so her back was facing him. Booth groaned and shuffled into Katie's room to see what was bothering her.

"Hey, sweet girl, what's wrong?" Booth cooed, picking her up out of her crib.

Katie continued to cry in his arms. Booth put a hand to her forehand.

"You're burning up. Here, let's find that ear thermometer to take your temperature. Bones! Come here!"

He found the thermometer on one of the shelves of her changing table and coaxed her into letting him put it in her ear. Brennan shuffled into the room right as it beeped.

"What is it?" she yawned.

"She has a temperature of 102," Booth told her, handing her the thermometer so she could see.

"Oh no," Brennan started, suddenly more awake. "What do we do?"

"Don't ask me, you're the one with the doctorate!"

"Not in medicine! You have a son; you've done this before."

"The doctor's office was open when he got sick. It wasn't during the middle of the night. Should we take her to the ER?"

"No, it's not that serious. It's not like she's bleeding out of her skull. What did the doctor tell you to do with Parker? Do you remember?"

"I bet it seems pretty serious to her!"

"Booth, think!"

"Okay, okay. He gave us this purple liquid stuff and told us to put a humidifier in his room and umm…"

"Purple liquid stuff? Really?"

"It was a long time ago, okay?"

"Okay, maybe if we just take her to a 24 hour pharmacy, they'll know what to give her."

"But, Bones, do pharmacists actually know what to prescribe people? I thought they were just like, I don't know, chemists."

"No, no I dated one once. He was very good with symptoms and associating the right medication with them."

"Do I even want to know?"

"…not really."

"Okay then, moving on. You go put her in her car seat while I find a shirt."

"Well, I can, but I have to change too."

"Oh you look fine," Booth told her brushing past her out of Katie's room.

"I'm not wearing a bra."

"Who's gonna notice?"

"I will. It will only take me a minute. Not a whole lot can be done to help our daughter in the mean time."

Booth paused, pulling a shirt out of his dresser. "You just called her _our daughter_."

"She is though. Honestly, that's all you got out of that?"

"Right, sorry," he apologized, pulling the shirt over his head. "Here, I can hold her while you change."

An hour later, they'd finally located a pharmacist who could help them, and returned home with some 'red liquid stuff' (Katie had said no to the grape). The pharmacist had guessed that she had just contracted the bug that had been going around, and the medicine she had given them should help Katie to sleep through the night. She highly recommended that Katie should see her pediatrician in the morning, however.

Brennan stood over her crib now, watching her sleep. The medicine, as hard as it was to get Katie to drink it, had done the trick. With a small sigh of relief, she turned off Katie's light and returned to her bedroom.

"I think I'm going to take work off tomorrow," she told Booth, getting back under the covers.

"You? You never do such things! Who will ever solve murders without you?" he asked, mockingly.

"Arastoo is completely capable of doing the job without me. If he has any questions, I'll have my phone. Besides, Katie needs me and I have to take her to the doctor and –"

"I'll take tomorrow off too."

"You will?"

"Much like you, I have all of this vacation time I never use. If the squints get a big break in the case, they can call us. Until then, I'm going to be here, taking care of my family…and getting caught up on my sleep."

"You're a good man, Booth. Don't let anyone ever tell you otherwise."

* * *

It turned out that the pharmacist had been right. Katie had caught the local bug, probably from daycare. After a long day of struggling to keep her comfortable, Booth and Brennan had finally gotten her to sleep again. It was 8:00 now and the couple was practically passed out on the couch.

"Maybe we should just go to bed," Booth suggested with a yawn.

"It's only 8," Brennan protested. "We can find something to do."

"Like what?"

"I don't know. Perhaps we could watch another one of those home movies."

"Bones, are you sure? Last time…"

"I think that's part of why I want to watch one," she answered with a shrug.

"Are you in the mood for a good cry or something?"

"You don't understand. I _need_ to be okay. For Katie, for you, but most of all for myself. And the only way that I can tell if I finally am would be to see them again. So let's find one."

Booth leaned over and kissed her on the top of her head. "Okay, I'll go pick a random one out."

He pushed himself off of the couch and returned minutes later with a DVD in hand.

"None of them are labeled. So I have no clue what this is."

"It'll be a nice surprise then."

He nodded, putting it in the DVD player and returning to Brennan on the couch. The DVD whirred to life revealing the squint team assembled in Brennan's office. A single strand of garland was strung around the ceiling.

"Was this Christmas?" Booth asked.

Brennan nodded.

"_Jack, why is it necessary that you film this?" Angela asked, exasperated._

"_It's your first pregnant Christmas. It needs to be documented."_

"_I'm barely even showing yet."_

"_Well, by next Christmas we'll have an actual baby so…"_

"_Fine, whatever," she said, rolling her eyes. _

Booth chuckled to himself. "I had no idea Hodgins enjoyed filming so much."

Brennan smiled. "Oh yeah. It was his secret hobby."

"_I guess we should start exchanging gifts then," Cam suggested. "Wait, where's Booth?"_

"_He's not coming," Brennan answered quietly. "He's with Hannah." _

"_But he has to be here," Sweets protested. "This is our tradition. And I drew his name."_

"_Well he's not going to be here. Here Angela, he drew your name," Brennan told her, handing her a small box. _

"_You can't be serious? He's blowing us off so what, he can get laid?" Angela asked._

"_Angie –" Hodgins started._

"_It's his life. He can do whatever the hell he wants," Brennan said. _

"_Sweetie –"_

"_I tried okay? I told him how I felt and he still picked her. Now please, can we just –"_

"_What do you mean he still picked her?" Angela demanded. "What did you tell him?"_

"_Can we talk about this later?" Brennan asked, eyeing the camera. _

"_Brennan, he's supposed to be in love with you."_

"_He never said that," she answered, shaking her head. "Please can we just exchange gifts, do whatever, and not talk about this?" _

Booth grabbed the remote and hit pause.

"What are you doing?" Brennan asked.

"I can't watch this anymore," he confessed. "I don't need to be reminded of how badly I hurt you and how blind I was to all of it."

"It's okay, I'm over it," she told him, reaching for the remote.

"You're over it?" he asked, holding it away from her.

She sighed. "Yes. I have what I want now, _you_. And what happened, yes it was heart crushing and I've been holding a grudge about it for quite a while, but I'm not mad anymore. And seeing Angela and Hodgins no longer overwhelms me with sadness. I'm happy, Booth. I'm finally happy."

"Really? You are?"

"Yes! You know when we found out that Katie was sick, I panicked. But I think for the first time, instead of asking myself what Angela and Hodgins would do, I asked _myself _what to do. She is my daughter, _our_ daughter. We are going to raise her to be such a great person. And while I still miss my friends, I can't let it run my life anymore. We have so much more to look forward to, to keep dwelling on the past. I get that now. And while you may think that this random home movie selection was a bad choice, I think it was a great one. Because that woman, that version of me…she's gone. I finally feel like myself again. I haven't felt this way in years."

"You got all of that out of this video?" Booth asked with a laugh.

"No, of course not. It was just…it was good okay? Don't you feel it? Don't you feel like you can finally breathe again?"

"I've been able to breathe ever since you agreed to take me back."

"So what, I'm your main priority in life?"

"I just hate fighting with you. Not to say that this whole ordeal we've been put through was easy to get over. I mean I miss them like crazy and having Katie as my daughter is a huge change. But when we're okay, I feel okay. Cause it means that I don't have to go through all of this alone. That's what I've been trying to get you to see. You're not alone, Bones. You were never alone."

Brennan smiled and leaned over to kiss him.

"Thank you for being there," she mumbled against his lips.

"I'll always be here."

"So what do we do know? We've barely wasted an hour."

"Sleep?" Booth asked hopefully.

"How about some ice cream? Or some beer?"

"We could always have them together. You know like a root beer float without the float."

"That sounds disgusting."

"Don't knock it until you've tried it."

"Have you tried it?"

"Well no. But like you were saying earlier, this is our new start, our new life. Might as well just dive on in to the unknown together."

"When I said that, I meant on a much larger scale than a new drink concoction."

"Ah, come on, Bones. Where's that sense of adventure of yours?"

"Okay fine. But you're taking the first bite."

* * *

AN: Awww I forgot how precious this chapter was. Send me your love! :)


	16. All of a Sudden

_All of a sudden it's the summertime._

_Things change so quickly and I don't know why._

_And it's all right now, it's all right. It's all right now, it's all right._

_And you can stay here as long as you like._

_It's kind of nice to have you by my side. _

* * *

June had always been his favorite month when he was a kid. The weather was finally hot enough to go swimming and play baseball and ride his bike. He loved summer in general, but June was the first month where it really felt like summer. And even as he got older, and no longer had his summers off, June remained to be his favorite month.

Currently the month was living up to his expectations. He was at the pool with his three favorite people: Parker, Bones, and Katie. Brennan sat next to him, covering Katie in sunscreen. Parker was busy continuously jumping off of the diving board.

"I wish everyday was like this," Booth yawned, stretching his arms over his head.

"We'll be sure to retire somewhere warm," Brennan smiled. "Like L.A."

"First of all, Los Angeles? Really? And secondly, we're retiring together now?"

"Yes, really. It's warm and I could turn my books into movies. And we're partners, Booth. We don't work well with others, so I find that it is very logical for us to retire at the same time. "

"You're insane."

"Rude."

"Dad! Bones! Watch this!"

Booth turned his head to find his son bouncing on the high dive. "Whoa buddy, be careful! Landing wrong from that thing could really hurt. No belly flops or back flops!"

"Relax Dad, I'm not seven anymore. I'm not stupid either. Cannonball!"

Parker jumped off, tucking his knees into his chest and creating a giant splash.

"He favors that one jump over all of the others. Always has," Brennan mused.

"Well look at you," Booth started. "Memorizing my son's jumping preferences."

"What, you haven't noticed?"

"No, I – never mind. I just think it's sweet, that's all."

Parker ran over to them, dripping wet. "Did you guys see that? That lady over there said my splash was so big, I got her towel wet!"

"Did you apologize?" Booth asked.

"No. She didn't seem upset by it. She looked amazed."

"Parker –"

"Yes, we saw it," Brennan cut him off.

"Cool. Hey, do you want me to take Katie over to the kiddie pool for a little bit? We haven't had a lot of brother/sister bonding yet."

"Sure, that'd be great, Parker. Thank you."

She handed Katie over to him and watched as he took her over to the shallow little pool.

"Keep an eye on her, Parks!" Booth called after him.

"Don't worry, Dad! Sheesh, it's not like I'm going to let her drown."

"Booth, maybe should be a little easier on him. He's being a good big brother. And he's starting middle school in the fall. He's growing up and becoming a good man just like his father."

"Ugh, don't remind me. I still look at him and see him being Katie's age."

"That doesn't make any sense."

"It means I still see him as a kid, my little boy…not my little man."

"They grow up fast, don't they?"

"So fast. Just you wait, in no time at all Katie will be talking about boys."

"Please, don't rush these things."

Booth laughed turning to check on his kids again. Katie was sitting in the kiddie pool, splashing Parker's ankles as he laughed.

"He's always wanted siblings," Booth stated.

"Well, I'm glad we could provide him with one, even if it wasn't under the best circumstances."

"That's for sure."

They fell back into silence as Brennan picked up her magazine and began reading. Booth had to laugh. Most women he knew would be reading _In Style_ or some other garbage poolside. Not his Bones. Nope, she was reading _The American Journal of Physical Anthropology_. It amused him since he never thought that he'd be the kind to fall in love with the "brainy type." But love her, he did, brains and all.

"Interesting," she muttered.

"What is?"

"They seemed to have found this new technique to determine where the person lived based off the minerals in their bones."

"I'm sure it's very complicated and confusing."

"Actually, it's quite simple. You just –"

"No, no that's okay. I'm doing just fine without the squint talk explanation."

"Are you sure? It's fascinating."

"I wouldn't understand it."

"Suit yourself."

She resumed reading, allowing Booth to drift off for a little bit as the sun warmed his skin. In no time at all, he felt something wet land on his lap. He opened his eyes and found Katie staring at him.

"Where did you come from?" he asked, slightly startled.

Parker waved at him and then jumped back into the big pool.

"Here, I can take her," Brennan told him reaching for her. "Go play with your son."

Booth smiled, handed Katie over, and jumped into the pool after Parker. Brennan smiled, watching as they tried to dunk each other.

"Boys will be boys," she told Katie.

The child giggled in response just as Brennan's cell phone went off.

"Dr. Brennan," she answered.

"Hey, no work!" Booth called to her. "It's Saturday!"

Brennan waved him off focusing on the call. Parker took the opportunity of his dad focusing on Brennan to tackle him into the water.

"Hi, yes this is Dr. Berryman of Middle Tennessee State University."

"Oh Dr. Berryman, hello. It's been a while since I've heard from you. How are things?"

"Fine, fine. How about yourself? I heard about what happened to your friends. My condolences."

"Yes, thank you. It took some adjusting, but things are pretty good now here as well. So what can I help you with?"

"I have a dig opportunity I think you'll be interested in. A possible new descendant of _Paranthropus robustus._"

"I'm intrigued. Where at?"

"Egypt."

"But _Paranthropus robustus _was discovered in Southern Africa!"

"I know! That's what makes this so exciting! Even if it isn't a descendant, it adds to our theories of mobility if they were able to travel that far."

"I'm definitely interested. When is it?"

"We leave in August and we'll be there for about five months, probably."

"Oh that sounds –"

"Mama," Katie said, pulling on Brennan's towel and dragging her back to reality.

"Dr. Brennan?"

"It sounds great, but I have a 20-month-old daughter now. I can't just leave her for five months."

"Think about your career, Dr. Brennan. I heard about Maluku and what a let down that was. This…this is another opportunity to get published."

"I don't –"

"I don't need an answer yet. Just promise me you'll think about and I'll call back in July."

"All right, fine. I'll think about it. Thank you."

She hung up the phone and stared down at Katie in her lap. She couldn't really leave her for five months could she? And she couldn't leave Booth…look at what happened the last time they parted ways for so long.

"Everything okay, Bones?" Booth asked, pushing himself out of the pool and heading for his towel.

"Yes, fine."

"Who was on the phone?"

"Just an old colleague of mine."

"Ah, I see. Just calling to catch up?"

"Basically."

"Dada," Katie smiled, reaching for Booth.

"Come here, Katie girl," he said, taking her from Brennan.

She picked up her anthropology journal again, attempting to read. Only now she couldn't, because with each article she looked at, all she could think about was Egypt.

* * *

"Come on, I have an idea," Booth told her, once both of the kids were asleep.

"Booth, it's past midnight. I just want to sleep," Brennan complained.

"No, no come on. You'll like it."

He led Brennan out into the backyard and over to a blanket that he had strategically placed away from the tree cover.

"The stars are really bright tonight," he whispered, taking her hand and leading her over to the blanket.

She lay down next to him and gazed up at the sky.

"You're right. They are."

They remained in silence for a few minutes, as Booth rubbed small circles into her hand with his thumb.

"What are you thinking about?" Brennan asked eventually.

"If you were going to die tomorrow, what would you want to do?"

"Where did that come from?"

"You asked me what I was thinking about, and that's it."

"I – I don't know. I'd want to spend it with you."

"Me too."

"Booth…"

"I – sorry. I guess I just have a lot on my mind right now. Spending the day with you three, it just got me thinking about how bad it would suck to get in a car accident or something."

Brennan rolled over and propped herself up on his chest.

"Hey, now neither of us can see the stars," Booth said with mock protest.

She leaned forward and kissed his nose, letting her hair tickle his chin.

"No, but really, if you knew that you were going to die tomorrow, how would you want to spend your last hours?" Booth asked.

"In bed with you."

"I'm serious."

"So am I!"

"Brennan," he sighed.

"What? What's so wrong with that? I love sex with you and if we only had a few hours left together could you think of a better way to spend it?"

"That's not the point."

"Then what is?"

Booth didn't answer, instead adjusting his head so he could see the stars around Brennan's head.

"Is your tumor back and you're not telling me? Because if it is I swear Booth I –"

"No, no nothing like that."

"Then talk to me."

"Why do you trust me?" Booth asked, softly.

"What?" Brennan asked, cocking her head to the side. She was taken aback by the question; it really had come out of nowhere and had little to nothing to do with dying.

"Well it's just…it seems like ever since your family left, you've only ever trusted two people…Angela and me. And I mean, you used to _hate_ me. You _hated_ it when I called you Bones, and now you get upset if I don't. So just…why do you trust me?"

"I just do."

"Ah come on, Bones, you don't go around telling just anybody your secrets."

"You're not just anybody."

Booth remained silent, but he continued to hold her gaze.

"What do you want me to say?" she asked him.

"I…I don't know."

"I just…I've trusted you since the beginning. At Cleo Eller's funeral, I told you that my parents disappeared when I was 15. And I don't know why I told you that, I just don't tell people that. But you're different and that's really the only way I can think to describe it. Where is all of this coming from, Booth?"

"When you were giving Katie her bath, I dozed off. Parker really wore me out at the pool today. I know it was just a dream, but it felt so incredibly real."

"What happened in this dream?"

"You died."

Brennan cupped his face with her hands.

"And I know I'm being ridiculous and probably sound like a whiney teenage girl, but it physically hurts…the thought of losing you."

"There's nothing ridiculous about it. The number of times I've had that dream about you. You're getting shot, or drowning on that boat, or getting blown up in Afghanistan. After everything we've been through together…I'm here, Booth. I'll always be here."

She leaned down to kiss him. His hands tangled into her hair, keeping her there.

"Umm Dad?"

Startled, Booth and Brennan pulled apart and turned their heads in Parker's direction.

"Parks! How long have you been standing there?" Booth asked, untangling himself from Brennan.

"Long enough."

"Ahem, well, what I can I help you with?"

"Katie started crying and I don't know what to do to help her."

"I'll get her," Brennan said, pushing herself up off the ground and heading into the house.

"You love Bones, don't you?" Parker asked when Brennan was out of earshot.

"Yeah, buddy I do."

"Are you going to marry her?"

"See now that's a tricky question. Because I want to…I would love to, but Bones she…she doesn't believe in marriage."

"How does that work?" Parker asked coming to sit next to his dad on the blanket.

"It's complicated. But basically she doesn't see a reason for it."

"That's dumb."

"Parker," Booth scolded.

"Well it is. If two people love each other they should be able to stand before everybody and make a commitment to each other."

"When did you get so wise?" Booth asked as he nudged him with his shoulder. "Look I know what Bones and I have is unconventional, but it works for us. We're happy."

"Well as long you're happy. You've been unhappy for so long, and I hate seeing you that way."

"Did I look unhappy today?"

"No."

"Well then, I'm touched by your concern, but you don't need to be. This is the good life buddy," Booth said, ruffling his son's hair. "Hey look a firefly. First one I've seen all year. I remember you used to love catching those things."

"Ha yeah I did. I bet Katie will love it too someday."

"I bet she will," Booth yawned. "It's late. Let's go to bed."

He led Parker back into the house, told him goodnight again, and found Brennan brushing her teeth in their bathroom. He grabbed his own toothbrush, loaded it with toothpaste, and began brushing next to her.

"Well this is domestic," Brennan commented, spitting out the toothpaste in her mouth.

"And so very romantic," Booth said, spitting as well. "Look, we're combining our spit."

"Very mature," she laughed before taking a drink of water.

"What did Katie want?"

"A new diaper," Brennan responded, putting up her hair to wash her face.

"Oh well how nice of you to give her one."

"I try. You and Parker were out there for a while. Did you have a good talk?"

"Yeah. Smart kid, that one. Wanted to know when we were getting married."

Brennan stopped rubbing the soap onto her face and locked eyes with him in the mirror. "What did you tell him?"

"The truth. That you don't believe in marriage."

Brennan nodded and resumed washing her face. "Was he upset by this?"

"Sort of. He didn't get it. But I told him that we're happy and that's all that matters."

"Good Dad," she said, patting him on the head as she walked into their bedroom. "Did you bring in that blanket from outside? It's supposed to rain tonight."

"Yeah I did."

Booth crawled into bed next to her, watching as she put lotion on her hands.

"Lavender?" he asked, sniffing the air.

"Correct."

"We really have become a domestic couple, haven't we?"

"Who would have thought?"

"Angela," Booth stated.

Brennan burst out laughing. "You know, I bet you're right. If anyone could have predicted that we'd get here, it would be her."

"One of the things that saddens me the most about her being gone is the fact that she's missing all of this. She wanted us together from day one and now here we are."

"Well, the next time someone asks us why we're together, we have two options. We can either say that it was our dying friend's last request or that we're doing this to honor her memory."

It was Booth's turn to burst out laughing. "That's twisted…I love it. And you."

He gave her a quick kiss before turning off the lamp.

"I love you too. Good night."

"Good night, Bones."

* * *

AN: Yay for totally random fluffy chapters! Ahem. Only three chapters left after this one, and one more twist to be thrown your way. Reviews warm my heart. Also. I'll be out of town all of next week so I probably won't update again until the 4th or the 5th.


	17. Made For Us

_Call this what you want, it never seemed so close._

_Don't pretend you care._

_We both know that there were dreams we've had that were put on hold._

_Aren't we more than we've told?_

_Don't say it doesn't matter anymore. This was made for us._

_We've held all that we've wanted for so long._

_This was made for us. _

* * *

For a month, Brennan had tossed and turned with the decision to go to Egypt. She even went as far as to make a pros and cons list. Her only real cons had been Booth and Katie. She would have included her work at the Jeffersonian, but she had the tendency to leave every summer in the past, and nothing bad had ever come of it. Except for when _everyone_ decided to leave. So her pros list was much longer than her cons, and the more she thought about it, the more excited she was. She hadn't been on a vacation of any type since Maluku, and she enjoyed the thought of being able to get a way for while and rediscover her roots in physical anthropology.

She wanted to go, she did, but her single two cons were really weighing her down. How could she just leave Katie for five months, that little girl needed her. And besides, she would be missing her 2nd birthday, how could she do that? And then there was Booth, to whom she had promised that she'd always be here. But it's not like she was abandoning them, she going to work…for five months. Plus it was something that she really, really wanted to do.

When Dr. Berryman finally did call her back, expecting her final answer, she gave in and told him yes. She had made a promise to herself that her career would always come first in her life. Of course she had made that back when she saw herself never settling down with a family…but still, she needed this. This was the final step she needed in feeling like herself again. If she could just get back out into the field, she knew she would feel better. Her only issue now was how to tell Booth…

"Bones, come on we're going to be late!" he called upstairs to her.

"Why don't you just go on ahead since you're in the wedding party and Katie and I will just meet you there?" she called back down.

"Saves gas if we go together."

"I'm good for it."

"Bones!"

"Okay, okay fine," Brennan said, appearing at the top of the stairs with Katie in her arms.

"Well don't you two look beautiful?" Booth smiled.

"Thank you. I still can't believe that Sweets and Daisy are getting married today."

"Why, because you're so against marriage?"

"No, because Sweets could do so much better."

"Bones! That girl worships you."

"Yes, I know. But that doesn't make her any less annoying."

Booth chuckled as he followed her out of their house and helped Katie get buckled into her car seat.

"Are you sure we should be bringing her?" he asked.

"Absolutely. Michelle said she was coming and has no date, so she would love to watch her for us."

"She just wants money."

"We'd be paying a sitter either way. At least this way, she'll be right there with us."

Booth got into the driver's seat and started to head to the church. In the back of her mind, Brennan knew that this was a bad time to bring this up, but she also knew that she would just feel guilty until she told him.

"Booth, there's…there's something that I need to tell you," she confessed.

"Are you pregnant?"

"What? No."

"Oh okay, go on then."

"Okay well, I was approached with the opportunity to go to Egypt next month and work on the discovery of this new hominid species."

"Ha, what'd you tell them? Thanks, but no thanks?"

"I told him yes," Brennan said looking over to gauge his reaction.

"Yes?!" Booth exclaimed, tightening his grip on the steering wheel. "For how long?"

"Five months," she answered softly.

"Five months?! You – what – you're going to miss Katie's birthday and – what were you thinking? You're just going to pick up and leave us?"

"They need me over there."

"_We_ need you here. Jesus, Bones, think about Katie. Do you really want to be the second mom to abandon her?"

"Angela _died_, Booth. She didn't _want_ to leave her daughter."

"But you do? You have a choice here, Bones. You're not _required_ to leave."

"It's only for a couple of months; it's not like I'm leaving forever. And besides I go on these trips all of the time."

"Yeah, well that was before you had a daughter to worry about."

"It's not like I asked for this. I was just handed her by a terrible turn of events."

"But you _wanted_ it. A couple of years ago you told me that you wanted to have a baby with my sperm. Would you go off on these crazy trips for months at a time if you had gone through with it?"

"Yes. My career is important to me, Booth, you know that. And I will not let being a mother change who I am, whether we're talking about a child I gave birth to myself or that little girl in the backseat we call our daughter!"

"Right, exactly, our daughter. You're right, you haven't changed, Brennan. You're running. Just like you always do when you get scared!"

"I'm not running! I'm sorry that you're not a scientist and you don't understand the importance of this discovery."

"You're right, I don't get it. Man evolved from apes; got it, great, good, move on already!"

"I'm going, end of story."

Booth pulled their call into the church parking lot. "I forbid you to go."

"Oh you _forbid_ me?" Brennan laughed getting out of the car. "What is this 1952? I'm not your damn wife."

"No fucking kidding," he muttered, opening the back door to take Katie out.

"You're so insufferable sometimes. I hope you understand that."

"I know what insufferable means, Brennan. I'm not as stupid as you think I am."

"That's not what I meant. I meant…you know what I can't deal with this right now. I'm going inside. Give her to me."

"Are you sure? It's not like you wanted her to begin with or anything."

"Give her. To me," Brennan commanded, glaring at him. He grumbled something incoherent and handed her over.

"Whatever happened to that dream of having your own kid anyway?" Booth asked her retreating back. "Why'd you give up on it?"

Brennan stopped in her tracks. "Oh I don't know, let's see. You had a brain tumor that resulted in a coma which caused you to believe I was your wife. Avalon came around declaring our love for each other based off of those stupid tarot cards. Just when things felt normal again you decided to tell me that you were in love with me, but I wasn't ready to admit that I was yet. I left for Maluku and you left for Afghanistan, and when we came back and I was finally ready to tell you I wanted to start something…fucking Hannah shows up! So there, Booth, that's what happened to my precious dream."

"I knew it! I knew you were lying when you said you were over the Hannah thing."

"Oh well excuse me for feeling bitter about the whole thing. Maybe it's just easier for me to blame her for all of our problems in this relationship than to actually accept the fact that we're the screw ups."

"Right, cause it's totally her fault that you want to leave and go play Indiana Jones in Egypt for five months."

"You know that I hate being compared to fictitious characters," Brennan said through gritted teeth. "Look, can we just finish talking about this later? If I knew this was going to start World War Three, I would have waited until after the reception."

"What'd you think would come out of this? My undying support?"

"Yes. If you really love me, you should support my decisions."

"Not when they involve abandonment."

Brennan huffed and walked into the church, turning her back on him and this conversation. Let him act like a twelve-year-old about all of this. She didn't need his constant approval anyway.

* * *

The ceremony had been beautiful. Daisy looked gorgeous in her fluffy white princess dress and the look on Sweets' face when he saw her had been priceless. And unlike the last wedding he had attended, the bride wasn't already married. No, things had gone smoothly and perfectly. Expect, the entire time he was standing up by Sweets acting as best man, the only thing Booth could focus on was Brennan out in the audience. Katie happily sat on her lap, not knowing that anything was wrong, not knowing that her mother was leaving her for five months.

When it had come time to exchange the rings, Sweets had to poke Booth to get his attention.

"Everything okay?" Sweets asked, taking the ring from him.

Booth just nodded, trying to focus on the actual ceremony for what was left of it. But then they were saying their vows and his head turned back to Brennan. How could she just leave him? After everything. Had he done something wrong again?

The ceremony eventually ended, and they drove to the reception in silence. She didn't even speak to him as she unbuckled Katie from her car seat and headed into the hotel ballroom. He didn't get why she was mad, she was getting her way and leaving. He was the one who had every right to be pissed.

Upon entering the ballroom, Booth headed straight for the open bar. He was going to resort to drinking away his conversation with Brennan. This probably wasn't the best idea considering he still had to give his best man's toast later, but at this point he really didn't care.

"Are you sure you're okay?" Sweets asked him moments later. "You seem…distracted."

"She's leaving me," Booth told him, drinking a swig of the rum and coke he'd just ordered.

"Who's leaving you?"

"Brennan."

"You can't be serious."

Booth just stared at him, taking another drink.

"Well did she say why?"

"She's going to Egypt for five months for some anthropological something or other."

"Oh that's all?" Sweets asked, sounding relieved.

"That's all?" Booth repeated. "She's leaving me for five months! She's missing Katie's birthday! Why am I the only one who sees this as a bad idea?"

"She's just doing what Brennan does, Booth. Relax." Sweets patted him on the back and headed towards his table to find Daisy.

"She's running!" Booth called after him. "She's a coward!"

And of course, after Booth had downed one drink too many the maid of honor was finishing up her speech and the microphone was being passed to him. He stared at it in his hands for a minute trying to remember the speech he had prepared. But he couldn't get passed his anger, and the alcohol in his system certainly wasn't helping. So he just started speaking his mind…

"Okay then, well," Booth started, slightly fearing what was about to come out of his mouth. "Hello, hi everyone. Sweets and Daisy, they're some pretty great kids. But enough about them, I want to take this time to tell you all a little something about love."

_Oh no, here we go._

"I'm going to quote this guy, Neil Gaiman," Booth continued. "He had some pretty some great advice… Have you ever been in love? Horrible isn't it? It makes you so vulnerable. It opens your chest and it opens your heart and it means that someone can get inside you and mess you up. You build up all these defenses, you build up a whole suit of armor, so that nothing can hurt you, then one stupid person, wanders into your stupid life…You give them a piece of you."

He was speaking directly at Brennan now, watching her squirm uncomfortably in her seat.

"They didn't ask for it. They did something dumb one day, like kiss you, or smile at you, and then your life isn't your own anymore. Love takes hostages. It gets inside you. It eats you out and leaves you crying in the darkness, so a simple phrase like 'maybe we should just be friends' turns into a glass splinter working its way into your heart. It hurts. Not just in the imagination. Not just in the mind. It's a soul-hurt, a real gets-inside-you-and-rips-you-apart pain. I hate love."

Brennan had handed Katie to Michelle and was now running out of the ballroom.

"To Sweets and Daisy, may that last part never happen to you," Booth said in a rush as he handed the microphone off to whoever was next to him and ran after her. "Brennan!"

She spun around just outside the ballroom doors and advanced on him. "At what point did you think any of that was a good idea?" she asked, poking him in the chest. "What goes on between us is ours, you taught me that. You don't need to broadcast our problems to the entire party."

"I'm a little drunk, all right? Sorry."

"Sorry? That's all I get? You tell everyone that being with me is the most painful miserable thing in the entire world and all you can say is sorry? I didn't break up with you. I still love you. My leaving has nothing to do with you."

"Well if it's not me, then what is it? Why do you want to go do this so badly?"

"It's my career we're talking about here, Booth. This could be huge for me."

"Bullshit. That's not the real reason and you know it."

"Excuse me?"

"You are a best-selling author who has also published countless scientific articles already and you are the best forensic anthropologist in the world. You've done enough work in your career already to leave behind a legacy. And so what this discovery could get your name in textbooks or something? Making your name just another one of the hundreds that students have to memorize? You don't need this to help your career. So tell me why you're really leaving."

Cam had appeared out in the hallway by this point. "I hate to interrupt, but we can all hear you arguing in there."

"Great, wonderful," Brennan muttered, walking away from the door of the ballroom.

"Answer my question, Brennan," Booth said, walking after her.

"So what you can't call me 'Bones' when you're mad at me?" she asked instead.

"Apparently not," Booth sighed, crossing his arms over his chest. "Now, why are you really leaving?"

"Where exactly are you going?" Cam butted in.

"Not now," Brennan answered at the same time that Booth said, "Stay out of this."

"Okay, I'll check back later," Cam responded, excusing herself back to the ballroom.

"I just need this, okay?" Brennan finally said.

"But why?"

"I feel like I've lost myself. For the past ten months I've been forced into this role of mother and girlfriend and part-time botanist…all things which I'm not. My life has become Cheerios and mindless cartoons and stories about letters climbing trees and I just need a break. I need to feel like myself again. And going to Egypt and working on this project would give me that. I love you and Katie, but lately I feel like I'm drowning. Like overnight I've become this domestic housewife and that is not who I am."

"Well I'm sorry that being part of a real family is just so terrible for you."

"Booth, I never said that. I –"

"No, you didn't have to. You're used to being alone, I get that. I can take full custody of Katie if you want me to."

"No! No, I don't want that. I still want us to be a family. Just because I'm leaving –"

"You don't want this, Brennan. You just said that. If you feel so trapped by all of this, then by all means, leave. If Katie and I aren't enough reason to keep you here, then enjoy your five months in Egypt. But don't stand there and tell me that this isn't you _running_."

She was crying now, but he couldn't make himself care at this point.

"Your toast…is being with me really that awful?" she asked, wiping at her eyes.

"No. I love you and I love being with you, but the thought of you not being here for five months? I can't be apart from you for that long again, I need you. Katie needs you. Just suck it up and stay."

"I can't stay. Even if you don't understand, I need this."

"Fine. But don't expect things to just pick up where you left off when you get back."

"Are you breaking up with me? Over this?"

Booth remained silent.

"You see? This is why I told you no outside of Sweets office, why I fought this for so long. Because I _knew_ I would just end up hurting you in the end."

"When do you leave?"

"First week of August. Now we can spend these next two weeks being happy like we were or you can spend them hating and ignoring me. It's your choice."

"I don't want you to go, Bones."

"I know."

Sweets popped his head out from around the ballroom door. "Everything okay out here?"

"Sorry about that toast," Booth apologized, brushing past him and heading back into the reception without a word to Brennan.

She nodded, biting back more tears, as she realized that Booth had chosen his latter option.

"Hey, what's going on?" Sweets asked, moving over to try and comfort her. "Is he still being a baby about you going to Egypt?"

Her head snapped up to meet his. "You actually don't think I'm a terrible person for leaving for five months?"

"No. You're Dr. Brennan. It's what you do. Anthropology is really important to you."

"Why can't he see that?"

"Because he's in love with you. He's being selfish and only thinking about himself."

"He's thinking about Katie too."

"You can always Skype," Sweets suggested with a shrug.

"Will you talk to him? He may not want to listen to me, but maybe he'll listen to you."

"If he won't listen to you, I doubt he'll listen to anyone else."

"Just try okay? Because I need to get him to understand. We've come so far in these past ten months to go back to that place where we hate each other."

"Okay I'll try, but I doubt it will be as effective as Angela yelling at him."

Brennan couldn't help, but laugh.

"One way or another, Dr. Brennan, you and Booth will get past this. You guys are just…meant to be."

* * *

AN: *Hides in a corner.* So what does everyone think she's going to do? Is she going to stay? Leave for the full five months? Leave and then realize her mistake and come back early? Send me your guesses!


	18. Set Fire to the Rain

_Sometimes I wake up by the door._

_Now that you're gone must be waiting for you._

_Even now when it's already over, I can't help myself from looking for you._

_I set fire to the rain. _

_Watched it pour as I touched your face._

_Let it burn while I cried cause I heard it screaming out your name. _

* * *

The house was quiet. Too quiet. She'd barely been gone for a month, and already it felt like a year. Katie had been fussy the entire time as expected. Brennan had tried Skyping her once, but it hadn't been enough. The girl wanted her mommy.

Booth was lonely too. He hadn't realized how much he talked to her whether it be ranting, complaining, or a random comment about one thing or another. No wonder he had turned to Hannah for comfort and attention while he was in Afghanistan. Being alone sucked.

On Monday morning, he wandered into Cam's office and slumped down in her desk chair with a sigh. She walked in moments later, startled to find him at her desk.

"Problem, Seeley?" she asked, setting the victim's stomach she'd just removed from the remains down on her autopsy table.

"Why do I let her do this to me?"

"Let who do what?" she asked looking for her scalpel.

"Really? You're going to do that with me sitting right here?"

"I'm at work. This is what I do. So, yes." She cut into the tissue without waiting for him to respond and started to examine the stomach contents. "Oh look, steak."

"Okay that smells worse than the dead body itself. Seriously, Camille, this couldn't have waited?" Booth asked covering his nose with his suit jacket.

"Do you want me to solve this murder, or not?"

"How does learning what he ate prior to death help with anything?"

"It has in the past, okay? So I repeat, who is doing what to you now?"

"Bones! I…I let her get into my head."

"Oh, have you spoken to her lately?"

"No, I have not."

"Then I'm lost. Okay seriously, he swallowed a chicken bone too? Just why?"

"Will you stop doing that?"

"I have so many things I need to get done right now, I need to be working while you're venting to me. So go ahead, carry on."

Booth sighed. "Fine. She just…she's the most...remarkable ...maddening... challenging... frustrating person I have ever met."

"Is that a quote from Castle?" Cam asked, cinching her eyebrows together.

"What?"

"Nothing. Carry on!"

He shook his head. "I want to hate her. I want to hate her for leaving, for…for running. I want to hate her for putting her career first and claiming that her life has become too domestic for her liking. She's stubborn and she thinks too highly of herself and assumes that everyone else is an idiot unless they've proven themselves otherwise. She still doesn't understand pop culture references and she has the occasional tendency to be awkward."

"But?" Cam prompted, sifting through more of the stomach contents.

"But she's beautiful. And she's great with Katie, she really is. And I do love how smart she is…it's sexy. _She's_ sexy, from her smile to those eyes. God those eyes. Have you ever really looked at her eyes? They're like this beautiful sky blue with this golden ring right around her pupils. They're stunning. _She's_ stunning. And her hair… Plus she can be quite comical sometimes, like the other day…last month…"

"So, you miss her," Cam said flatly, properly disposing of the stomach contents.

"Find anything helpful?"

Cam shook her head no.

"Well yeah I miss her. I love her."

"But you don't want to," Cam stated, taking off her gloves and moving to wash her hands.

"Right, because she's maddening and…."

"And challenging and frustrating and remarkable. You said that. As did Richard Castle in last season's finale."

"Okay, what do you keep talking about?"

"My point is, Seeley that you can bitch and moan about her all you want, but she's your other half…some would argue your better half. Was now the wrong time for her to go to Egypt for five months? Maybe. But you have to stop and see things from her perspective."

"They were my friends too," Booth argued. "Everyone keeps saying 'Oh poor Brennan, she lost her best friend.' Well you know what? I lost them too. We all did. And she wasn't the only one who had Katie just dropped in her lap and who was forced to move and alter her life. I have the same perspective she does, and I'm not running anywhere."

"She doesn't adjust to change well."

"I know her better than anyone all right? So don't sit here and try to explain away her decision to leave."

"Then I'm not really sure what you want from me," Cam admitted moving around to stand in front of her desk.

"I want you to tell me that it's going to be okay. That after five months apart we can still be us. That after five months, maybe I won't be so mad at her and will finally understand why it is that she needed to get away so bad."

"She will come back to you with open arms I can guarantee it. She loves you. You just need to remember that she's Dr. Brennan. Traveling around the world for anthropological reasons is what she does. And just because she has a family now, that's not going to change that. You say that you know her better than anyone. So here's an idea: take a second and think about the woman you've fallen in love with. You've known her for what about nine years now? If you truly know who she is, then you know why she had to do this."

Booth was silent for a moment, ruffling through the piles of papers on her desk.

"Your advice has gotten a lot better since you told me to tell her about the Hannah thing," Booth mumbled at last.

"Yeah well I've learned from my mistakes. Maybe learned to channel a little bit of Angela too," Cam smiled. "So what are you going to do?"

"Try to make it to January. Damn it, I just realized she's missing Christmas too. I could invite her family over again, but it would just be awkward without her there."

"Jump that hurdle when you get there, Seeley. Now if you'll excuse me, I have to go check in on Daisy and Fischer."

"So that's what you're doing now? With Bones gone, two squinterns at once?"

"Yes. And if you ask me, Daisy and Fischer are polar opposites working together and even less is getting accomplished than normal around here."

"Then go on and be head boss lady. I'll be fine."

"You know you could always go talk to Sweets. I'm sure he'd love to help."

"He just tries to shrink me…still."

"Suit yourself," Cam called over her shoulder as she exited her office. "Have a good day, Seeley."

* * *

"All right Miss Katie, what do you want for dinner? How about some nice spaghetti?" Booth asked, ruffling through the kitchen cabinets.

"No. Cheerios," Katie told him.

"Sweetie, that's all that you've eaten in the past two days. It's time to eat something else. How about some chicken?" Booth asked, holding up a bag of frozen Tyson popcorn chicken.

"No. Cheerios."

"Katie, you need to eat something else."

She shook her head no and started chanting Cheerios over and over until Booth finally gave up and poured her a bowel of her favorite cereal.

"There are still a couple of weeks before your birthday and already you've entered the terrible twos," Booth told her, slumping down in a chair at the kitchen table.

Katie just watched him, contentedly munching on her cereal.

"Are you acting this way because you think you can get away with things with your mom gone? Parker used to do that and I wanted to be the fun dad, so I let him. But it's not like you're just staying with me for the weekend. You and me babe, we're in this together for a couple more months. You're gonna have to start cooperating with me. Cheerios are good for your heart and cholesterol and all, but those are hardly things a two-year-old needs to worry about."

She just continued to stare at him while eating.

"You know I've noticed that ever since she left, you've stopped talking other than 'no' and 'Cheerios.' You were starting to learn some good words too. I promise you kid, she is coming back. This isn't like when you lost your birth parents."

Katie still didn't have anything to say. Booth pushed himself out of the chair where he was sitting and moved to make himself some dinner. Just because his daughter was eating cereal for dinner, didn't mean that he had to. As he poked holes in the film of his microwave dinner for ventilation, he wondered how much more he could take of this single dad stuff. If Katie didn't eat something soon, he feared he may have to call in Rebecca.

* * *

"So what have we learned?" Booth asked the next day, swiping his card to ascend on the platform.

"Fischer and I are currently at odds about the cause of death," Daisy told him with a huff, shooting Fischer a dirty look.

"Look, I'm telling you. The puncture marks on the ribs have healed, they didn't kill him. Your newlywed brain is affecting your skill," Fischer explained.

"Newlywed brain? Ha! That's absurd."

"Actually, no it isn't."

"Okay, why don't you just call in another squintern for a third opinion?" Booth suggested. "We really need cause of death ASAP."

"I have time of death," Dr. Wessland butted in. "Judging by the larval stages of the blow flies I found, he'd been dead around five days by the time of discovery."

"Five days? How did he lose so much flesh in five days?" Booth asked.

"I'm not sure. Which is why I think these two are going about finding cause of death all wrong!"

"We can hear you, you know!" Daisy called back. "And we don't sit around criticizing your work, so don't go around criticizing ours!"

"But we do criticize his work," Fischer whispered.

"Oh shush," she whispered back.

Cam made her way over to the platform. "How's it going?"

Daisy, Fischer, and Dr. Wessland all exchanged a look before all talking at once, arguing with one another and trying to justify their cause of death theory to their boss. Cam shot Booth an exasperated look. He pulled her aside, allowing the squints to continue to argue amongst themselves.

"You know, when I said that we could get along just fine without Dr. Brennan, we at least still had Angela and Hodgins around," Cam said through gritted teeth.

"Hey, at least you still have people here unlike when we all left you a couple of years ago," Booth said, trying to get her to look on the bright side.

"Ugh don't remind me. I almost lost my job over that."

"I have finished the facial reconstruction," Annah announced, walking up to the two of them. "Here." She handed Cam her drawing.

"All right thank you. I'll have this run through missing persons."

"May I leave early? It is my baby brother's 21st birthday."

"It's only 11," Cam said, looking at her watch.

"Yes, I know. But until they decide on how he died, I have nothing else to do here."

"Well then, okay," Cam sighed. "But just for today. Don't make a habit out of it."

"Kisses," Annah called over her shoulder, heading out of the lab.

"Employee of the month right there," Booth joked with a chuckle.

"She's an excellent artist," Cam defended, holding up her drawing. "She just sucks at following a structured schedule."

"There has to be someone better."

"I know. I'd start interviewing again, but without Dr. Brennan here to voice her approval…"

"Bones hates her. It would probably be a welcome surprise to come back and have her gone."

"Unless I hire someone she hates even more."

"Well then tough. You're her boss. She's not yours."

"You do remember when I took over for Dr. Goodman, don't you? She has never seen me as her boss and she never will. If anything now, she sees us as equals."

"That's quite the compliment coming from her."

"Have you decided if you're still mad at her yet?" Cam asked, crossing her arms over her chest.

"It comes and goes."

"Personally, I think it's time to just let it go, but far be it from me to tell you how to live your life."

"Oh Camille, what ever would I do without you?'

* * *

"Should we see if the Phillies won their game today?" Booth asked Katie as she played with her blocks.

"No."

"What? You want them to lose?"

"Yes."

"Well that's not very nice. I don't go around telling you that I wish _The Wiggles_ would get canceled."

Katie giggled and rolled her ball into her block tower, knocking it down. She made an explosion sound.

"Ah going into demolition I see. That's a good career choice for you." He turned his attention back to ESPN as he heard the announcer mention Philadelphia. "Damn it they lost again! Pull it together why don't you? God, what a terrible season this has been."

He looked back over to find that Katie had wandered away.

"Hey kid, where'd you go?"

She scurried back in moments later with a book in her arms. Booth helped her crawl up onto the couch and she handed the book to him.

"Now who said it was story time? Sports Center is on!"

She pointed at the book and then gave him that begging look he just knew he was going to hate when she was older.

"All right, all right." He muted the TV in the background and opened the book. "Once upon a time as a Queen sits sewing at her window, she pricks her finger on her needle and three drops of blood fall on the snow that had fallen on her ebony window frame. As she looks at the blood on the snow, she says to herself, 'Oh, how I wish that I had a daughter that had skin white as snow, lips red as blood, and hair black as ebony'. Soon after that, the queen gives birth to a baby girl who has skin white as snow, lips red as blood, and hair black as ebony. They name her Princess Snow White."

Booth paused, flipping back to the cover to see what version of the story this was. "The Brothers Grimm? You know sweetie, the Disney version is probably what we should be reading."

Katie pushed the cover back out of his hands, and pointed back at the page to tell him to keep reading.

"You're right," he told her. "Bones probably prefers reading you Grimm rather than Disney."

He continued on with the story, smiling at how enthralled she was in it. "Not knowing that this new queen was indeed her stepdaughter, she arrives at the wedding, and her heart fills with the deepest of dread when she realizes the truth. As punishment for her wicked ways, a pair of heated iron shoes are brought forth with tongs and placed before the Queen. She is then forced to step into the iron shoes and dance until she drops dead… Okay seriously that's how it ends? That's terrible. Next time, we're finding the Disney version."

"Mama," Katie said.

"I know, I know. Bones hates Disney. But these dark and twisted fairytales are too mature for someone your age. Leave all of this death talk to your parents, not harmless little princesses."

"No, Mama!" Katie said again pointing toward the foyer.

Booth finally looked up and met Brennan's eyes in the doorframe. Her suitcase was in her hand behind her and she was soaking wet. A little half smile formed across her lips. He imagined that this must be like one of those moments in sitcoms where the live audience goes wild with applause and cheers.

"Is it raining?" he asked stupidly, at a loss for words.

"Appears to be," Brennan responded, finger combing her wet hair.

Katie hopped off of the couch and ran to her. Brennan scooped her up in her arms and twirled her around.

"I missed you so much, baby girl," Brennan said, placing a kiss on the top of her head.

She clung to her side, burying her face in Brennan's wet jacket.

"You're going to get all wet," Brennan laughed, trying to put her down.

When Katie wouldn't let her, she sighed reluctantly and hoisted her back up on her hip.

"Did the dig get canceled or something?" Booth asked, closing _Snow White_ and placing it on the couch next to him.

"No, it's still going on."

"Then what are you doing here?"

"I live here."

"Bones –"

"I came back, all right? Isn't that enough?"

Booth scrubbed a hand over his face. "Why don't you put Katie to bed and get changed, and then we'll talk?"

"Fine."

Brennan grabbed her suitcase and headed upstairs with Katie in tow. 20 minutes later, she wandered back into the living room.

"Have trouble getting her down?" Booth asked.

"Yeah, she wouldn't let me leave."

"I don't blame her."

She nodded, crossing her arms over her chest. She was wearing boxers and that old FBI sweatshirt of his again. Her hair had mostly dried from the rain, but now curled at odd angles from air drying. And yet she still managed to look beautiful. Brennan drew her lower lip into her mouth waiting for him to speak again.

"It's only been a month," Booth said at last. "What made you come back?"

"I'm in love with you…and Katie. And I've never felt this way about anyone before. And it terrifies me. It does, but…being away from you two is too hard."

Booth got up off of the couch and started to move towards her.

"And I'm sorry. I should've realized that yes, my life has changed, but it's not necessarily a bad thing anymore. I'm happy. I'm happy with sticky fingers and Cheerios and dirty laundry and you. The only thing I want is you."

He reached out and tangled her hair with his right hand. She parted her lips to kiss him, but he didn't let her.

"Say, 'I got off the plane,'" he whispered.

"What?"

"Just say it. I'll show you later."

"I got off the plane."

He closed the distance between them, kissing her with all of the passion he could muster. Their tongues danced as she kissed him back with such a fever, one would think she'd been gone for a year instead of a month. Booth pulled her flush against him, needing to feel her there right next to him, every inch of her body right where it should be. She pulled away from the kiss, breathless, wrapping her arms around him tightly. He returned her solid embrace.

"You put your arms around me and I'm home," she whispered. "Never let me go."

"I tried," he laughed. "I tried so hard. But I'm sorry too. I should have…I know you, Bones, better than anyone. I should have realized that you were just doing what Temperance Brennan does – being an anthropologist."

She kissed his neck. "I shouldn't have left. As hard as it has been for me to accept it, I am not that person anymore. I can't just put the job first like I used to. Family has to come first."

"You have no idea how happy I am to hear you say that."

Booth pulled apart from their embrace, took her by the hand, and led her over to the couch. Instead of sitting on the couch next to him, Brennan opted for straddling his hips. His arms wrapped around her torso as her arms laced behind his neck.

"How's the team doing at work?" she asked, toying with the little tuft of hair at the nape of his neck.

"You really want to talk about them right now?"

She shook her head, tilting her head down to kiss him again. She rocked her hips against his as the kiss intensified and he let out a little moan.

"I'm really glad you're home, Bones."

"I'm really glad to _be_ home. Thank you for not still being angry with me."

"Well you can thank Cam for that. She actually had some good advice for once."

Brennan smiled, dragging the pad of her thumb across his lips.

"Come on," Booth started. "Let's go to bed."

"But it's so early," Brennan protested.

"Sleeping isn't exactly what I had in mind," he said with a wink.

A devilish grin spread across her face as she pulled him off of the couch and pushed him upstairs. Yes, it was good to be home.

* * *

AN: Okay. So. I do not own the Castle references or the Friends references or the Grimm Brother's fairytales or even the two songs I quoted within this chapter. The final chapter might be posted at a really odd time because I have work week for sorority stuff next weekend, but it will be posted and then we can all cry together. Review please?


	19. New Year

_The sun is out, I rush to the window._

_Suddenly I just want to let go of the past and start all over again._

_So I say come on, open your eyes and see what's outside._

_There's nothing to fear, it's a new year._

* * *

_When I first took the job at the Jeffersonian, I never expected it to change my life the way that it has. It was supposed to be just a job; a way to pay the bills why allowing me to continue with my passion for anthropology. And that's all that it was for a while…until I found my place, my family. _

_To Dr. Jack Hodgins – You were the first one to join my team all of those years ago. You used to have quite the anger problem, but I think that meeting Angela loosened you up a bit. Ever since we almost died together buried alive in my car, I have felt a special attachment to you. I think sharing that type of experience with anyone would almost have to bring you closer, so I'm glad that I got to experience it with you. Thank you for, as Booth would put it, always having my back. You have been a great friend over the years and you are truly, deeply missed. And fear not, Katie is in the best of hands. We'll help her discover her daddy's passion for science. R.I.P._

_To Angela Montenegro – Where do I even begin, Ange? The way I see it, you saved me when I was drowning. You were the first person I ever really opened up to about my childhood and I will be forever grateful for your listening and support. I do believe that you once told me that you loved me like a sister. I agree with this. You were my sister, my best friend in my new makeshift family. While having lost you will never get easier, I have learned to make peace with it. And I want you and Hodgins to know that Booth and I are taking great care of your daughter and when she's old enough, we plan to tell her about how truly amazing her parents really were. I'm also sure you'll be happy to know that Booth and I are finally happy together. Thank you for never giving up on us. Your longing need for us to be a couple has proved to even push us together from the grave. You're one hell of a match maker. R.I.P. _

_To Dr. Camille Saroyan – I know that in the beginning we didn't have the best of relationships. Let's face it, I didn't trust you. You swooped in from New York, stole the job I was hoping to get and my partner. Don't worry, you can keep the job, I took back what I really wanted. I won't deny that we've had our differences over the years, but in the end you have become one of my closet friends. Thank you for everything. Your help and support over the past few months as been immensely helpful. Again, I thank you._

_To Dr. Lance Sweets – I won't lie; I used to find you very annoying. Some days, I still do. But Sweets, you, much like Cam, have been immensely helpful as of late and I'm grateful. I will never understand psychology, but you are still an integral part of this team. You've earned a spot in my little work family because let's face it; I have a soft spot for you. Never lose your optimism in life, Sweets. It makes you who you are. Oh and I forgive you for not telling me that Booth was still alive…finally._

_To my interns – You are a very intelligent group of young individuals. You each show a lot of promise and passion for the field. I wanted you to know that I'm proud of everything that you've been able to accomplish over the past several years. And as I know the time for your dissertations is approaching rapidly, I wish you all the best of luck. You each deserve a doctorate. I thank you for all of your contributions. _

_To Special Agent Seeley Booth – Here I am publicly announcing that you were my muse for Andy Lister. Are you happy now? But in all seriousness, you have been my rock. We've had our rough patches, but when I needed you the most, you were there. Thank you for always being there…it means the world to me. You have been my best friend and partner for nine years now and I honestly have no clue what I would do without you. I love you so much. There are great things down the road for us; adventures that we'll dive into together…because we are quite the dynamic duo. _

_And to my Katie girl – Sweetie, I know you're not old enough to read this yet, but I just wanted you to know how much you are loved. Every single person in this dedication loves you more than you will ever possibly know. May you find the same type of friends in your life that I have found in mine. Thank you for opening my eyes and allowing me to see what it was that I truly wanted in life. _

"Bones, come on! People will be getting here soon!" Booth called from downstairs.

"Be right there!" Brennan called back.

Today was Katie's second birthday. Exactly a year ago Angela and Hodgins were in the car accident that cost them their lives. Exactly a year ago Brennan and Booth were granted full custody of their daughter. In that year their lives had changed more than she ever thought was possible. They'd morphed into this whole new family. And while a day didn't go by that she didn't miss her friends, she had honestly never been happier.

Brennan descended the stairs and lazily draped her arms around Booth in an embrace. He kissed the top of her head.

"What were you working on?" he asked.

"The dedication for my last Kathy Reichs book."

"Who's it to?"

"Wait and read it yourself."

"Before it's published?"

"After it's published."

"But –"

"Not this time."

"So it's to me then."

Brennan sighed. "It's to everyone. It's been a long a year and I owe so much to so many people."

"Well we can start by throwing them all this party!"

"This party isn't for them, it's for Katie."

"Bones, she's two. She's not going to remember this."

"Well no, but I will. It's the first birthday party I've ever thrown and I just want it to be perfect."

"You're ridiculous."

"For wanting to have the perfect party for our daughter?"

"She's two."

She rolled her eyes and went to find Katie sitting in the living room.

"Well don't you look pretty in your new purple princess dress!"

Katie giggled and ran over to hug her leg. Brennan laughed.

"Happy Birthday my sweet girl. Do you know how old you are today?"

The girl shrugged.

"You're two," Brennan told her holding up two fingers. Katie copied her. "Very good."

"Are you really teaching her math on her birthday?" Booth asked, walking into the room with an armful of balloons.

"You need to start early with these things."

"Oooo pretty," Katie said, reaching her tiny hands for the balloons.

"Come on birthday girl, let's go outside and tie some of these around the tables," Booth told her. "I'll let you play with the extras."

Brennan followed them outside. "How much of your family is coming today?"

"Just Pops and Parker. Jared had to work, which actually may turn out to be a good thing. How about from yours?"

"My dad, Russ and Amy, and their girls."

"Good. Parker will have someone to play with. Who all did you invite from the Jeffersonian again?"

"I like how we're discussing this minutes before they're set to arrive."

Booth shrugged tying three balloons around the leg of the food table.

"Cam who said she was bringing Michelle, Sweets, and my interns."

"Oh what, no new people?"

"No."

"But I thought you said you liked Dr. Ross."

"I do. As a colleague. Not as someone I need to invite to my house for my daughter's second birthday. Oh and I invited Angela's dad, but I haven't heard from him."

"Well then. It sounds like we're going to have the perfect blend of friends and family."

"Just our luck."

He came over and kissed her. She smiled into the kiss as she heard the doorbell ring.

"I have to go answer that," she told him, trying to get away.

"Let them wait. They're early," he responded pulling her in for another kiss.

The doorbell rang again.

"Booth!" Brennan exclaimed, slapping him away. "Save that for later."

"Promises, promises."

She shook her head and went to go answer the door. Of course Max had been the first one to arrive.

"Hello honey," he greeted, drawing her into a hug.

"Hi Dad."

"Where's the birthday girl?"

"Out back with Booth. He's still tying balloons onto things."

"Quite the decorator that one," Max laughed.

Brennan rolled her eyes and directed him out back as the doorbell rang again. Soon enough everyone had arrived and the backyard was a buzz with activity. The kids kicked a soccer ball around, weaving in and out of the various adults. Sweets and Daisy sat with Russ and Amy, no doubt discussing the joys of their recent nuptials with the only other married couple at the party. Max and Pops, the ever proud grandparents, sat playing with Katie. Michelle appeared to be flirting with Wendell, something which Cam seemed to be all too aware of. The rest of the squinterns stood around talking about who knows what.

Booth wandered over to Brennan who was standing all alone behind the food table. He slipped his arms around her waist from behind, and she sank into his chest.

"What are you doing over here all by yourself?"

"Just thinking."

"About what?"

"Katie's first birthday. It looked a lot like this. Only our family wasn't here and Angela had invited all of these random people from daycare so we would have more people to talk to and avoid each other."

"That's why they were here?" Booth laughed. "So we could better avoid each other?"

Brennan nodded.

"Wow. She was such a good friend," Booth stated.

"She really was. Hard to believe that a year ago, we were barely talking to each other."

"No kidding. A part of me feels like I have just blocked that out of my memory."

"I think you should remember it. Just in case you ever feel like being mad at me again, you'll know what the consequences are."

"Oh. Right," he laughed again, nudging her.

"Hey you two!" Wendell called. "Stop being antisocial and come join the party! You can cuddle later when we all leave."

"Hey now," Booth started, stepping away from Brennan and moving to join his conversation.

Brennan shook her head and moved over to talk to her brother.

"Are these two bothering you?" she asked, gesturing to Sweets and Daisy.

"Hey!" Sweets protested.

"No, Tempe, they're fine," Russ assured her.

"Okay good. Thought I would check," she answered, placing her hand on his shoulder.

"How are you?" Russ asked, patting her hand.

"I'm good. Really good. It's the best I've been in a long time."

"I'm glad. It makes me feel better to know that after everything you've been through, you've finally managed to find happiness in your life."

"Well it wasn't easy."

"With you it never is."

She smirked and shoved him.

"Ah now there's that little sister I've been missing," he teased.

"It's your own damn fault."

Russ looked hurt for a moment, no doubt thinking back to how he had just left her.

Brennan smiled again. "I'm just kidding."

"But you don't kid," Daisy interrupted.

"People change, Miss Wick…er Mrs. Sweets…Daisy. People change, Daisy. Even the ones who are most reluctant to it."

"I'm proud of you, Dr. Brennan. A couple years ago, you never would have said that," Sweets commented.

"Being a mom has made me soft I guess."

"Do you ever think you and Booth will have kids of your own?" Amy asked.

Brennan looked back over to Booth. He was talking to Wendell still, swinging an invisible bat. He was probably discussing the Phillies' recent win which had included two home runs one of which was a grand slam. She was surprised at herself for even knowing that.

"Probably," she answered at last. "At least one."

"I'm trained in midwifery you know," Daisy offered.

"We'll uh…revisit our options when it actually becomes necessary to," Brennan countered.

"Speech!" Max called, suddenly standing up.

"What are you talking about?" Brennan sighed from ten feet away.

"You and Booth, as our hosts, should make a little speech welcoming us and what not," Max explained.

"Why?"

"Because I don't know how many more of these parties I have left in me," Pops answered. "And I enjoy a nice heartfelt message."

Booth and Brennan found each other's eyes from across the yard and they both smiled. They both headed back to the patio and everyone gathered around them on the grass. Max carried Katie over and the other kids even stopped kicking the soccer ball to listen.

"Okay well welcome," Booth started. "We'll all sing 'Happy Birthday' to Katie later when we cut the cake. Umm…why don't you take over, Bones? You're the best-selling author."

"Okay umm right. So most of us were here a year ago celebrating Katie's very first birthday. It was a different time then. Angela and Hodgins were still with us and Booth and I hated each other very much."

Light laughter rippled through the group.

Brennan continued. "So much has changed. Some things for the better and some things for the worst, but such is life. I will never forget my friends whose lives Booth and I basically took over."

More laughter.

"But I no longer let their memory eat away at me during every waking moment either. I have learned how to be happy again and I have all of you to thank for that. If I've learned anything this past year it's that life as we know it can change in an instant. And we have to stop living in the past and start living for the future. After all, no one wants to look back on their life and wonder, if only. I've spent too much time wondering 'if only' in my own life in regards to certain things and I've finally stopped. You people here are my family; by blood or by, dare I say it, fate."

Booth nudged her with his elbow, no doubt recalling their very first conversation.

"So as this next chapter of our lives begins, I want you all to be a part of it. If we all had glasses I'd suggest we raise a toast, but since we don't, let's all sing Miss Katie 'Happy Birthday' and then cut the cake!"

Random people clapped as the group broke out into song.

"Better than Cyndi Lauper," Booth whispered, heading back inside to get a knife.

Brennan smiled.

* * *

The party had ended hours ago and currently Booth and Brennan sat outside in lawn chairs, refusing to clean up. Katie was curled up asleep on Brennan's lap.

"Guess we wore her out today," Booth smirked.

"Maybe I should wake her up. If I don't she'll wake us up bright and early tomorrow."

"And here I thought you were a morning person."

She groaned, stroking Katie's fine little curls. "You know, Amy asked me today if you and I were ever going to have a baby of our own."

"Did she now? What'd you tell her?"

"I told her yes, we'd probably have at least one."

"This is news to me."

"Booth, do you want to make a baby with me?"

"Hmm, right now?"

"No, not right now, you idiot."

"Hey now. Name calling."

Brennan rolled her eyes, shaking her head. Booth reached over and took her hand in his.

"I would love to make a baby with you," he told her.

"All right. I'll put it on my to-do list."

"Bones!"

She laughed. "Perhaps we should clean up."

"Meh."

"Or we could continue to sit here doing nothing."

"I like that option."

"Do you?"

"Yes. You know, Bones, this is the start of our brand new life together."

"New memories, new life."

They smiled at each other knowing that what lay ahead of them would definitely be worth the long and agonizing journey. They had each other, a daughter, a promise for a new baby, and great friends and family. And quite honestly, what else was there? This was the end of their beginning and their start of a new, happy life.

* * *

AN: BRB, crying. But no really guys, I'm so sad this is over. This baby was my labor of love for over a year and now it's all posted and over and stuff. Thank you all so much for joining me on this angst-ridden journey. I know sometimes I was a bit too angsty, but I thrive off of writing it so…sorry. Happy ending though woo! Also, yes there was another line from Castle in this chapter. I'm sorry, but I had to. It fit perfectly.

Future stories currently in the works: A little AU "Back to the Future" type of Bones story (that I totally named The Future in the Past before that was released as the premiere title) and my first ever multi-chapter Castle fic. Stay tuned!


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